The Daily Show: Number One in Fake News
V.O: George Washington sayeth he be honest.
WASHINGTON: I cannot tell a lie!
V.O.: But hear ye from those who knoweth him best.
VETERAN: I have served with George Washington.
I hath served with George Washington.
George Washington be not forthright about his war record.
Washington cares not a wit for his fellow man.
I know. My slave told me.
V.O.: And what of the legend crossing the Delaware?
VETERAN: He was not on the boat for that fateful night George Washington slept here.
This be not even the Delaware. Twas done at a tore trait studio in Weehawken.
VETERAN: I still notice the contours of Washington's face. We thinks they appear a trifle Hessian.
Look at him standing up in a boat. If he stands up in a boat, it's just bad boatsmanship.
Think ye know George Washington, think ye again.
My evidence be true.
V.O.: This paid for by continental campaign.