The Endorsement of Jesus
It isn't often that Wonkette gets to break the biggest political endorsement of the last two millennia, but today we bring you the Good News that Jesus has actually been watching! And He has some advice for people that are wondering how He'd like you to vote in the primaries and in November 2008. That advice? Stay home, because they're all hypocritical assholes who are using your religious values against you. Also, don't listen to Pat Robertson and James Dobson, because they're only interested in their own political power and aren't really that cool with the Big Guy. Jesus thinks you should vote for who you think will do a decent job because none of them have any real morals anyway and voting based on a religious worldview is thus pointless. Um, suddenly we at Wonkette are kinda down with this Jesus guy, and not just because he can turn water into wine.