The Maskless Marauder Returns To The White House, Takes Labored Breath Of Freedom


Donald Trump checked himself out of Walter Reed hospital Monday and declared himself as fit for duty as he ever was. Arriving at the White House Monday evening, Trump went up two flights of stairs to the Truman Balcony. This was already more exercise than he takes when he’s well, but it was worth pushing his COVID-riddled lungs to the limit so he could cosplay Mussolini and Eva Peron.

The still-contagious president immediately took off his mask, because he’s learned nothing and is incapable of demonstrating concern for others or modeling sensible behavior. This is the same man who looked directly at an eclipse and dared the sun to smite him. That orange makeup he thinks looks natural was back, presumably applied by terrified staffers with ten-foot poles.

According to the New York Times, Trump campaign advisers thought they could have a “political reset” if Trump survived the disease he’d caught through his own negligence and stupidity but at least appeared sympathetic and finally ready to take COVID-19 seriously. These people have apparently never met their candidate.

Trump didn’t just tweet that he felt better than he had in decades, because he was juiced up on steroids, but he also claimed that "maybe I'm immune, I don't know” during a campaign video filmed on the balcony. He is not immune. He is still very ill. And his obvious drug-induced euphoria means he should not have access to the nuclear codes.

[The New York Times]


Stephen Robinson

Stephen Robinson is a writer and social kibbitzer based in Portland, Oregon. He writes reviews for the A.V. Club and make believe for Cafe Nordo, an immersive theatre space in Seattle. He's also on the board of the Portland Playhouse theatre. His son describes him as a “play typer guy."


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