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Paul Ryan was asked today whether, like some top Republicans, he might have any nagging doubts about EPA administrator Scott Pruitt's ability to keep wrecking the environment. You know, anything at all that might lead him to think Pruitt should leave office, maybe a lot later this year, perhaps after the summer beach-oiling season. Here, enjoy his puzzled reply, in which he appears to channel Al Sleet, the Hippy-Dippy Weatherman, only without the funny parts:



Prew-witt, you say? Doesn't really ring a bell. You certainly can't expect the Speaker of the House to stay on top of every last little made-up "controversy" in the world, now can you?

We bet, if we try really hard, we could come up with some other things that Paul Ryan does not know. Especially since listicles look right nice with our new platform!

The End! Oh, also, Paul Ryan is thoroughly unaware that the best, most comprehensively fact-checked listicles and dick joketicles can be found right here at Yr Wonkette, and that we love our readers very much for helping us pay the bills!

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Doktor Zoom

Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.

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BREAKING ACHTUNG EVERYBODY CRY AND PANIC AND HAVE ROLLICKING SEXUAL INTERCOURSE, BECAUSE ROBERT MUELLER DID THE THING.

We don't know what the thing means yet, but we know that he gave the thing to Attorney General Bill Barr, who is presumably looking at the thing right now. Donald Trump is at Mar-a-Lago, so he does not have the thing, because NO THING FOR ILLEGITIMATE PRESIDENTS. Studies show that according to sources close to the investigation who may or may not be close to the investigation, we might have some real information on what is inside the thing sometime this weekend.

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Whatcha doin' down there at Mar-a-Lago, Mister Normal President Of America?

OK ... huh?

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