Thompson Papers Reveal Fundamental Misunderstanding of Barnyard Analogies

Two Americas - WonketteFred Thompson was in the Senate for eight magical years. And for those who wonder what, exactly, he was up to during those years, he graciously made all of his Senate records public a little while back. From them, we learn:

* W: 40 L: 32.

* Got pissed at Joe Lieberman and Chuck Grassley when they stole his Goo Goo Clusters.

* Bob Woodward is an embarrassing hack.

* Makes up stupid faux-down home metaphors, gets even more obnoxious when called on them:

In 2001, New York Times columnist William Safire wrote Thompson to ask what he had meant when he said "the ox is in the ditch" when it comes to postal reform. "Once again, you remind me that the rest of the country doesn't necessarily use the same phrases as a country boy from Tennessee," Thompson replied, confessing he'd actually never seen an ox in a ditch -- or frankly, an ox. "As usual, I have no idea where this comes from. All I know is that when the ox is in the ditch, it is a very serious matter -- very serious. A big ox, a small ditch, a big load and a hot day -- well, you can see the problem."

Yeah, we're starting to see the problem. It's as plain as an otter in a duck pond. In the south, where such things happen. Because we are just like you, idiotic American Voter.

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