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Christmas Monsters Steal Thousands of Toys From Underprivileged Children

News

Oh, just die already.

  • Massachusetts police are investigating the theft of approximately 1,500 "Toys for Tots" toys that were supposed to be delivered to needy children rather than thieved. This comes just days after a similar incident in Maine, in which a shrewd entrepreneur silent-auctioned an entire Toys for Tots warehouse on eBay. C'MON AMERICA. Children are already the most underprivileged and neglected demographic -- the child poverty rate is currently at an incomprehensible twenty percent -- so is it possible maybe not to steal toys from needy children, since most of the poor tykes are literally starving? Or is that too much to ask? Geezus Christ. Hundreds of years from now, historians will look back and say, "When everyone started stealing Christmas toys from orphans -- that was what made America exceptional. And thank goodness all those greedy fuckers died in a nuclear holocaust." [Fox News]
  • The Senate might actually vote on the totally noncontroversial, should-have-passed-a-million-years-ago START treaty sometime today! Dirty old tortoise Mitch McConnell is not pleased. [McClatchy]


  • What do warmongers want for Christmas? More "Special Operations ground raids across the border into Pakistan’s tribal areas," or so it seems. Ball's in your court, Santa. [NYT]

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Roger Stone, you got some 'splainin' to do, Mister! Remember all those times Stone swore on his Nixon tattoo that he never had any contact with Russians, wasn't a campaign surrogate, and wasn't tipped off to stolen DNC emails in advance? Like that time he told the Washington Post:

"I've never been to Russia. I didn't talk to anybody who was identifiably Russian during the two-year run-up to this campaign," he said. "I very definitely can't think of anybody who might have been a Russian without my knowledge. It's a canard."

Stone told the House Intelligence Committee the same thing last September, but, LOL FUNNY STORY! Seems that Stone just plum forgot about that time in May, 2016 when Trump communications advisor Michael Caputo asked him to meet with Henry Greenberg, "a man with a Make America Great Again hat and a viscous Russian accent." The Washington Post reports, Greenberg was offering sexxxxy Russian dirts on Hillary Clinton, which Stone and Caputo were only too happy to grab by the pussy. But they just couldn't get there!

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Congressman Beto O'Rourke, who hopes to replace Ted Cruz in the US Senate this fall, is one of several Texas and El Paso leaders participating in a march to the just-opened tent city at the US/Mexico border in Tornillo, Texas, where children have already been imprisoned "placed."

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