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Tom Osborne: Protecting Your Children from Titties Since 2004

football good, titties badIs former Nebraska head football coach Rep. Tom Osborne a hypocrite for founding the Sex and Violence in the Media Caucus? Of course not.


Let's say you're the head coach of a college football powerhouse, the kind that corn-fed, apple-cheeked farm kids look to for role models. One of your players throws a woman down the stairs! Another invites a woman into his room! (Sweet.) But then "pin[s] her down and ejaculate[s] on her face in front of his friends"! (Ooooh. . .) So, as that football coach (remember?), you'd just suspend the players for a game or two. Fair enough. Or, as Tom Osborne said when he was in just that position with a player he coached: "It's not as though Lawrence is an angry young man all the time and a threat to society." That's right. Just sometimes. And just the female half.

What's more, no breasts were revealed. And as far as we know, none of these episodes took place during a nationally televised half-time show.

Thanks to reader D.P. for helping us to clear up this issue.

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PHILLIPS SUED FOR ASSAULT EX-GIRLFRIEND MCEWEN SAYS FOOTBALL STAR OFTEN HURT HER, ONCE SEXUALLY [SJBLAW]

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