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Photo Credit:Gage Skidmore


Let's briefly note the irony of Donny Bonespurs representing the United States in Vietnam on Veterans Day. He finally made it to Danang! AHEM.

This weekend, Putin got a chance to check in with his protégé at the Asia-Pacific Economic Cooperation Summit. A perfect opportunity to assure the old fool that he did too win all the votes in 2016. And Putin is only too happy to whisper sweet nothings in the orange presidential ear.

Then Trump obediently trotted off to tell reporters that he is THE LEGITIMATEST PRESIDENT EVER! Via Axios,

I just asked him again. He said he absolutely did not meddle in our election, he did not do what they are saying he did.

Right. And the Russian hack of the DNC, Russian attacks on voting machines in 39 states, deceptive Facebook ads paid for in rubles, and the conclusion of the NSA, ODNI, CIA and FBI that it was Russian hacking directed by Putin? Per CNN,

I mean, give me a break, they are political hacks. So you look at it, I mean, you have Brennan, you have Clapper and you have Comey. Comey is proven now to be a liar and he is proven now to be a leaker. So you look at that and you have President Putin very strongly, vehemently says he had nothing to do with them.

Got it. Career civil servants who served under Democratic and Republican administrations are all hacks, said the guy who hired Carter Page and George Papadopoulos.

So WHODUNIT?

[T]hat whole thing was set up by the Democrats. Look at Podesta, look at all the things that they have done with the phony dossier. Those are the big events.

Well, at least he didn't call it The Dodgy Dossier. But this is entirely too stupid to argue about. It's like climate change -- the science is in, and people who choose not to believe aren't going to be convinced by any evidence. And frankly, we're all suffering from outrage fatigue right now.

To the extent there are tea leaves to be read in the reeking compost heap of Donald Trump's ramblings, however, we should note that he's got a brand new talking point: We can't investigate Russian interference in the election because ... North Korea.

If we had a relationship with Russia, that would be a good thing. In fact it would be a great thing, not a bad thing, because he could really help us on North Korea. We have a big problem with North Korea and China is helping us. And because of the lack of the relationship that we have with Russia, because of this artificial thing that's happening with this Democratic-inspired thing. We could really be helped a lot with Russia having to do with North Korea. You know you are talking about millions and millions of lives. This isn't baby stuff, this is the real deal. And if Russia helped us in addition to China, that problem would go away a lot faster.

So if Democrats don't quit examining the hacks in 2016 and shoring up the electoral system against future attacks, Russia will have hurt feelings and go running into the arms of North Korea. And then millions of people will die, and it will be all John Podesta's fault. It's just so obvious!

Donald Trump routinely threatens to rain fire down from the sky on North Korea, resulting in the deaths of millions of South Koreans.

But if shit goes sideways and people get dead, we should all blame Hillary Clinton. Got it? Also, too, we have to kill the Mueller investigation in the interest of national security!

Look for this nonsense in constant rotation on the Fox propaganda network next week. Up is down, down is up, and if we secure our voting machines against Russian hacks, then the terrorists win!

[Axios / CNN]

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Five Dollar Feminist

Your FDF lives in Baltimore under an assumed identity as an upstanding member of the PTA. Shhh, don't tell anyone she makes swears on the internet!

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Robbin Young. Fair use so we can all see the boob picture she sent to her 12 true loves.

Robbin Young starred in the Roger Moore masterpiece For Your Eyes Only as the seventh female lead, "Girl in Flower Shop." She also starred in a bunch of Playboys, and the DM's of a humble Romanian hacker who stole her heart. But he was not a humble Romanian hacker, he was 12 Russian military intelligence officers in a trench coat. And now Young has shared those DMs and pictures of her buzzies with the Sun, because that's the one that's fookin' classy.

See how she loved! See how Guccifer ghosted her ass! See how she loves him (them) still! See how she was all up in Seth Rich and shit! (We think Young's judgment might not be awesome.) Also she wrote this "erotic poem," and we're going to need you to read it.

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And now it is time for your weekly reminder that in the Trump era, FUCKING APESHIT OUTRAGE WORKS.

On Monday, Donald Trump, the transactional president who for some godforsaken reason sees Vladimir Putin has his one true father, discussed making an Art Of The Deal with Russia that involved letting Robert Mueller interrogate the Russian spies who hacked America in 2016 (with Russian supervision, of course, in Russia) in exchange for sending Putin whichever American citizens hurt Putin's poor fragile butthurt pansy-ass feelings the past several years. One of Putin's targets is Michael McFaul, the former ambassador to Russia, whom Putin just hates. Hillary Clinton isn't on the official list yet, but give it a few weeks.

On Wednesday, Sarah Huckabee Sanders looked at reporters and told them Trump's people were considering the idea, but hadn't decided yet, because it's so hard for the Trump administration to decide how many treasons to do per week.

But hooray! The White House has decided that, after literally every American with a patriotic bone in his or her body said, "THE FUCK YOU SAY," they will not send Americans to Putin's gulag after all. The Washington Post reports:

The White House announced Trump's opposition Thursday as the Senate prepared to vote on a resolution telling the president not to honor Putin's request, which would have exposed former U.S. ambassador Michael McFaul, among others, to Russian questioning.

"It is a proposal that was made in sincerity by President Putin, but President Trump disagrees with it," White House press secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders said in a statement.

Oh my fucking Lord, Shuckabee, did you really type that Putin's offer was "sincere," or did Donald grab the statement after you finished with it and add those words in illiterate Sharpie in the margins, along with "DOES NOT MEAN PUTIN IS NOT MY BEST FRIEND" and "NO COLLUSION"?

By the way, that resolution passed the Senate with flying colors:

WOMP WOMP, Trump! Sorry American freedom and democracy stepped all over your dick again! Guarantee it's gonna happen again! Go fuck yourself! Enjoy the 48 Big Macs you have for dinner tonight! Don't talk directly into the soccer ball Putin gave you, 'less you want it to talk back to you in Russian!

OK post over.

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[Washington Post]

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