TSA To Make Life Slightly Less Pleasant, Again
Hey, remember when the TSA discovered people traveling with cheese and wires and declared it to be signs of terrorist dry runs? But then it turns out that they weren't? Well, now we're going to make extra sure that they aren't. Gaming nerds will think twice before they bring their precious Nintendo Wiis and XBox 360s and PlayStation Whatevers onto airplanes in their carry-on bags, because now they're going to have to fish them out and put them on the conveyor belt at the security checkpoint, just like you have to do with your laptop!
In a good example of the sort of initiative that $11 an hour will buy, the idea for this new pointless exercise "came from a frontline security officer who screens passengers every day who observed that game consoles and DVD players are complex devices much like laptop computers." Yes, apparently the bureaucrats at the TSA didn't realize that, under the current rules, a bomb disguised as a video game console would get less scrutiny than a bomb disguised as a laptop. That's probably because neither one actually exists, but now, thanks to this heroic screener, the rules for getting on planes are now consistently pointless.
To speed up the boarding process, gamers are urged to put their consoles in their checked luggage, from which they will be stolen by baggage handlers.
In other sad news, nursing mothers will now be allowed to bring more than three ounces of breast milk onto planes, ruining the chances of flying perverts everywhere to see boobs. The breast milk will have to be "declared for inspection at the security checkpoint," which I don't even want to know what that means.