Trump
Trump Will Give Blue States Coronavirus Aid, Just Needs ONE TEENY TINY 'Favor Though'
NO QUID PRO QUO!
April 30, 2020 10:54 AM
Golly, that Pam Karlan impeachment witness lady sure was correct, wasn't she! In case you forgot impeachment, because it was so many decades ago, constitutional expert Karlan compared Trump's "I would like you to do us a favor though" extortion of Ukraine with a hypothetical wherein the president would try to withhold hurricane disaster aid from a state, unless they "brand my [political opponent] a criminal." Karlan's example was hurricanes, but pandemic works too.
This week Trump threatened to withhold coronavirus aid from states with cities that have sanctuary city policies, because of how Trump hates Mexicans a whole lot, because of how he is a wild-eyed mouthy bigot.
<p>It came up in an answer in one of his many press conferences this week, the ones we thought he said he was going to stop doing because of how every time he speaks, more people die of coronavirus or related causes:</p><video width="100%" controls="">
<source src="https://s3.amazonaws.com/roar-assets-auto.rbl.ms/runner%2F17142-trumpsanctuary2.mp4" type="video/mp4"></source>
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</video><p>Trump whined about not wanting to bail out (blue) states for "25 years of bad management," which echoes the extortion line Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell <a href="https://www.vanityfair.com/news/2020/04/mcconnells-plan-to-fund-blue-states-is-still-deeply-cynical" target="_blank">has been saying</a> this week, about how he doesn't want to give out "blue state bailouts" unless he can put those states in a headlock and force them to enact Republican policies to protect big business. </p><p>And then Trump <a href="https://www.businessinsider.com/trump-coronavirus-aid-threatens-to-withhold-states-sanctuary-cities-2020-4" target="_blank">demanded</a> "sanctuary city adjustments" from blue cities, saying he doesn't even think sanctuary city policies are popular with "radical left folks," because when you are a white bigot, you almost always think everybody else secretly agrees with your bigotry but is too shy to say so. </p><blockquote>"If it's COVID-related, I guess we can talk about it, but we'd want certain things also, including sanctuary-city adjustments," he told a White House event meant to promote measures to help businesses during the pandemic.<br><br>"That's one of the things I think about," he added. "If we were going to do something for the states, I think they'd probably want something having to do with sanctuary cities and other different points that we can discuss a little later on."</blockquote><p>That's that demented word salad babbling we love to hear from Donald Trump.</p><p>So Trump just wants to extort blue cities and states into letting his ICE act like a common Gestapo toward immigrants, in exchange for federal help surviving a pandemic. He didn't mention asking them to make up some dirt on Joe Biden, but we bet he wouldn't mind that either. And if they won't, maybe he just won't help! </p><p>Trump has been <a href="https://www.wonkette.com/donald-trump-sanctuary-cities" target="_blank">trying to force</a> states and cities <a href="https://www.wonkette.com/stephen-miller-gonna-end-sanctuary-cities-by-pissing-off-airline-passengers" target="_blank">to get rid of</a> sanctuary policies <a href="https://www.wonkette.com/stephen-miller-sanctuary-cities-plan" target="_blank">since the beginning,</a> there's hardly any need to rehash it all here. It's been one of the primary features of his presidency, because of how he's a bigot. He <a href="https://www.wonkette.com/amp/judge-rules-trump-sanctuary-cities-executive-order-as-unconstitutional-as-all-the-other-ones-2569200104" target="_blank">tried to pull</a> this sort of extortion with an executive order way back in 2017. Obviously now he and his Hitler mini-me Stephen Miller think maybe they have the leverage to finally get this done. </p><p>So will this amount to anything? <em>Wellllllllllllllll</em> who knows. Obviously, Trump and Mitch McConnell are somewhere in the same playbook this week, so clearly the GOP is on this "let's extort blue states and force them to look like us and dress like us and do Handmaid's Tale shit like us" train together.</p><p>But at the same time, Donald Trump expressing his anal glands at a reporter is sometimes just that. The East Room of the White House gets all stinky, but once somebody Lysols the place — NOT THE <a href="https://www.wonkette.com/dear-fox-news-viewers-do-not-inject-yourself-with-bleach-or-try-to-swallow-a-tanning-bed" target="_blank">CORONAVIRUS-CURING LYSOL,</a> DON'T USE THAT! — nothing actually happens. </p><p>We made a mistake yesterday. When Trump <a href="https://www.wonkette.com/president-meat-sweats-hereby-orders-americas-meat-makers-to-keep-making-him-meats" target="_blank">announced</a> he was HEREBY ORDERING all the meat plants must remain open, we made the mistake of taking him a <em>little bit</em> too seriously — as did most of the media — and forgetting that often when Trump announces a thing, it's something he just kind of made up on the fly because his diaper is full and GRRR ANGRY. But then when the real order comes out, it's some weak sauce cutting-room-floor bullshit his aides gussied up to make him feel better. The GIVE ME MEATS executive order was still bad when it came out, of course, but what he really did was order state governments not to <em>close</em> meat plants. Which ... OK. It's still bad, but not quite what Trump said.</p><p>And of course, when Trump <a href="https://www.wonkette.com/trump-suspending-immigration-because-hey-where-are-the-f-cking-tests" target="_blank">"banned immigration"</a> or whatever a couple days/weeks/months/years ago, to protect Americans from the hordes of immigrants who are storming our borders and taking all the jobs that don't exist during the pandemic, the executive order that came out really didn't do shit about fuck.</p><p>Point is it's always a pretty bad idea to take Donald Trump's words too seriously, because that man is fucking idiot. Let's wait to see what he actually does.</p><p>[<a href="https://www.businessinsider.com/trump-coronavirus-aid-threatens-to-withhold-states-sanctuary-cities-2020-4" target="_blank">Business Insider</a>]</p><p><strong>Follow Evan Hurst on Twitter <a href="http://twitter.com/evanhurst" target="_blank">RIGHT HERE, DO IT RIGHT HERE!</a><br></strong></p><p><strong>Wonkette is fully funded by readers like YOU. If you love Wonkette, SUPPORT WONKETTE FINANCIALLY.</strong><br></p><p></p><p><a href="https://amzn.to/33mKzZe" target="_blank">Do your Amazon shopping through this link, because reasons</a>.</p><p></p><p></p><form name="donation" method="post" class="donation-form"><p class="subheadline">How often would you like to donate?</p><div class="form-row row--plan"><label class="plan-type__label"><input type="radio" name="plan_type" value="once" class="plan-type" required="" checked> Just once
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Impeachment
Fired Intel Community Inspector General Very Nicely Tells President Crime-Baby To Eat A Bag Of F*ck
Michael Atkinson has a few more things he'd like to say!
April 06, 2020 11:01 AM
Friday night, in a late news dump, we learned that Donald Trump fired Michael Atkinson, the intelligence community inspector general, because we guess he was having a little shithole authoritarian temper tantrum and that was the only thing that would make him feel better. Yes, Trump did this in the middle of a pandemic that he is so serious about that he's obsessively trying to make Americans ingest an unproven drug that may or may not be effective.
Atkinson's sin, obviously, is that he protected the whistleblower who made America aware that Trump was trying to steal another election by actively extorting Ukraine to announce fake investigations into Joe Biden in exchange for military aid that Congress had already appropriated and was desperately needed by Ukraine in its hot war with Russia. Atkinson also made Congress aware of the whistleblower complaint, which is what he was supposed to do according to the law. And yes, that includes Adam Schiff, because he is the chairman of the House Intelligence Committee.
In other words, Trump fired Atkinson for doing his job, exactly as we'd expect an un-American barely elected president with authoritarian tendencies to do.
Atkinson has responded to being fired, and it's quite a statement, albeit an extremely professional one:
It is hard not to think that the President's loss of confidence in me derives from my having faithfully discharged my legal obligations as an independent and impartial Inspector General, and from my commitment to continue to do so.
Yep, that's what happened! Here is the full statement:
<p class="shortcode-media shortcode-media-rebelmouse-image">
<img type="lazy-image" data-runner-src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yMjkxNTA3Mi9vcmlnaW4uanBnIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTU5Nzk4NjM0MH0.alXpugb_x9J93nsl9fREHRZC8NT82o2R-6QZGn_SkTw/img.jpg?width=980" id="5e5b5" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="d87a7890c9be1926d04000ff76dd3e71" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image">
</p><p>Atkinson gave a fervent defense of our American process for protecting whistleblowers from regimes that just cannot stop committing crimes, defended his lawful handling of the Ukraine whistleblower complaint, and signed off with a message for the other IGs, which kinda boils down to "Yes I am being fired for doing my job, and Donald Trump is trying to intimidate all the other IGs who are witnesses to his crimes. Fuck him."</p><p> Of course, he says it nicer than that:</p><blockquote>Finally, a message for any government employee or contractor who believes they have learned of or observed unethical, wasteful, or illegal behavior in the federal government. They are counting on you to use authorized channels to bravely speak up -- there is no disgrace in doing so. It is important to remember, as others have said, that the need for secrecy in the United States intelligence Community is not a grant of power, but a grant of trust. [...] I have faith that my colleagues in Inspectors General Offices throughout the federal government will continue to operate effective and independent whistleblower programs, and that they will continue to do everything in their power to protect the rights of whistleblowers. Please do not allow recent events to silence your voices. </blockquote><p>"Please do not allow recent events to silence your voices." Ooh, we wonder what he means by that!</p><p>Before coronavirus became the only thing we have time to think about, Trump <a href="https://www.wonkette.com/white-house-purges-all-deep-state-imperialist-running-dogs-it-inexplicably-hired" target="_blank">was on a rampage</a> purging <a href="https://www.wonkette.com/purge-beginneth" target="_blank">all the people</a> who witnessed the crimes he committed against Ukraine and against American democracy, for which he was rightfully impeached forever and then acquitted in a Kremlin-style Susan Collins sham trial in the Senate. Trump's little stunt Friday night shows you where his heart really is, and it's not with the thousands of dead bodies piling up, deaths he could have done something to prevent if he wasn't singularly focused on exacting retribution against the patriots who saw something and said something about his crimes. </p><p>Trump's mal-developed shitbaby pattern continues even in the coronavirus crisis, as we saw the other day when the (acting) secretary of the Navy <a href="https://www.wonkette.com/navy-captain-booted-for-caring-more-about-4-000-sailors-lives-than-he-cares-about-donald-trumps-ego" target="_blank">relieved Captain Brett Crozier</a> from command of the <em>USS Theodore Roosevelt</em> after Crozier spoke out to protect the 4,000 sailors in his keep from the mindfucking incompetence of the Trump coronavirus response. Trump <a href="https://www.politico.com/news/2020/04/04/trump-brett-crozier-letter-165020" target="_blank">claims</a> he didn't personally make the decision to fire Crozier, but that didn't stop him from publicly bitching and moaning about Crozier this weekend. And if Trump in fact did not make the decision, it doesn't negate our point, but merely confirms that Thomas Modly, the (acting) secretary of the Navy, is a Trump hack who doesn't need to be told to do Trump's dirty whiny ass titty baby work.</p><blockquote>"The letter was a five-page letter from a captain, and the letter was all over the place," Trump said. "That's not appropriate."<br><br>"I thought it was terrible, what he did, to write a letter. I mean, this isn't a class on literature. This is a captain of a massive ship that's nuclear powered. And he shouldn't be talking that way in a letter," Trump said.</blockquote><p>Fuck you.</p><p>And of course, Trump also<a href="https://nypost.com/2020/04/06/trump-defends-firing-terrible-intel-watchdog-michael-atkinson/" target="_blank"> found time</a> during the pandemic this weekend to bitch and moan some more about acting ICIG Michael Atkinson, whom he had fired the night before. </p><blockquote>On Saturday, Trump defended his move to fire Atkinson during a press conference, saying, "I thought he did a terrible job. Absolutely terrible."<br><br><span></span>"He took this terrible, inaccurate whistleblower report and he brought it to Congress."</blockquote><p>That <a href="https://www.wonkette.com/donald-trump-grrr-mad-lets-read-the-whistleblower-complaint-thats-making-him-grrr-mad" target="_blank">whistleblower complaint</a> was 100 percent fucking accurate, maybe the dumbshit president of the United States should <a href="https://www.wonkette.com/trumps-ukraine-transcript-is-real-and-it-is-bugf-ck" target="_blank">READ TEH TREAJSJD;KFADKKFJAJICRRIPT5!11!1PENIS!</a></p><p>Trump also said of the whistleblower during that presser that "somebody should sue his ass off," and babbled more about "fake reports" and "perfect calls," because he literally knows 100 words and just recycles them over and over again:</p><p class="shortcode-media shortcode-media-youtube">
<span style="display:block;position:relative;padding-top:56.25%;" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="6671bda800efb406c26eb713957d16bb"><iframe type="lazy-iframe" data-runner-src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/tqUjOyVxf1A?rel=0" width="100%" height="auto" frameborder="0" scrolling="no" style="position:absolute;top:0;left:0;width:100%;height:100%;"></iframe></span>
<small class="image-media media-caption" placeholder="Add Photo Caption...">Trump says of whistleblower: 'Somebody ought to sue his ass off'</small>
<small class="image-media media-photo-credit" placeholder="Add Photo Credit...">
<a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tqUjOyVxf1A" target="_blank">www.youtube.com</a>
</small>
</p><p>This is what Trump is using his corona-lingus press conferences for these days. Whining and bellyaching about the few remaining competent people in the United States government, both the ones he's fired and the ones he hasn't had a chance to fire yet.<br></p><p>Isn't it awesome that Trump is whining like this while dead bodies pile up all around him? This must be what MAGA really means.</p><p>[<a href="%22The%20letter%20was%20a%20five-page%20letter%20from%20a%20captain,%20and%20the%20letter%20was%20all%20over%20the%20place,%22%20Trump%20said.%20%22That's%20not%20appropriate.%22%20%20%E2%80%9CI%20thought%20it%20was%20terrible,%20what%20he%20did,%20to%20write%20a%20letter.%20I%20mean,%20this%20isn't%20a%20class%20on%20literature.%20This%20is%20a%20captain%20of%20a%20massive%20ship%20that's%20nuclear%20powered.%20And%20he%20shouldn't%20be%20talking%20that%20way%20in%20a%20letter,%E2%80%9D%20Trump%20said." target="_blank">Politico</a> / <a href="https://nypost.com/2020/04/06/trump-defends-firing-terrible-intel-watchdog-michael-atkinson/" target="_blank">New York Post</a>]</p><p><strong>Follow Evan Hurst on Twitter <a href="http://twitter.com/evanhurst" target="_blank">RIGHT HERE, DO IT RIGHT HERE!</a></strong></p><p><strong>Wonkette is fully funded by readers like YOU. If you love Wonkette, SUPPORT WONKETTE FINANCIALLY.</strong><br></p><p></p><p><a href="https://amzn.to/33mKzZe" target="_blank">Do your Amazon shopping through this link, because reasons</a>.</p><p></p><p></p><form name="donation" method="post" class="donation-form"><p class="subheadline">How often would you like to donate?</p><div class="form-row row--plan"><label class="plan-type__label"><input type="radio" name="plan_type" value="once" class="plan-type" required="" checked> Just once
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Impeachment
Trump Firing Intelligence IG For Doing His Job? Sure, Why Not?
It's just the way things are now.
April 04, 2020 01:30 PM
Late Friday night, among a slew of other announcements, Donald Trump announced that he would be firing intelligence community inspector general Michael Atkinson, whose decision to tell lawmakers about a whistleblower's assertions about Trump's dealings with Ukraine resulted in Trump getting impeached. Of course, as an independent watchdog, this was literally an example of Atkinson doing his actual job, but the Trump administration has always been much bigger on loyalty than on people doing their actual jobs.
In a letter, Trump (or someone writing for him, as is more likely the case) explained that he needs to have the "fullest confidence" in his inspectors general, and that as long as he has the power to fire those he does not have "confidence" in, he will do so.
Via New York Times:
"As is the case with regard to other positions where I, as president, have the power of appointment, by and with the advice and consent of the Senate, it is vital that I have the fullest confidence in the appointees serving as inspectors general," Mr. Trump wrote. "That is no longer the case with regard to this inspector general."
The president has long discussed his desire to fire several inspectors general, and he has been talking to aides about his desire to oust Mr. Atkinson since last fall, tarring the inspector general as disloyal because he sought to share information with Congress about the president's efforts to pressure Ukraine into delivering him personal political benefits.
Mr. Atkinson's fate was sealed after the trial on impeachment charges ended, said one Trump administration official, who spoke on the condition of anonymity to discuss a delicate matter.
<p>Trump then stated that he would soon nominate another inspector general who "has my full confidence and who meets the appropriate qualifications." </p><p>This should not surprise you. It should also not surprise you that technically, the President is not supposed to be allowed to just straight up fire an inspector general out of nowhere. That, in fact, is pretty illegal. </p><blockquote>Under the law that created the position of the inspector general for the intelligence community, the president can only remove that person a month after notifying the intelligence communities of his intentions and rationale.<br><br>But rather than being permitted to serve for another month, the White House told Mr. Atkinson late Friday that he was being placed on administrative leave, according to multiple people familiar with the matter. The move effectively circumvents the 30-day safeguard by sidelining him immediately.<br></blockquote><p>Clearly, the only thing he has true "confidence" in is his ability to do obviously illegal shit with absolutely no consequences.</p><p>Trump also announced the hiring of five new inspectors general, believed to be people who would be a lot more loyal to him. </p><p>The only surprising thing here, really, is that Atkinson wasn't fired before. Trump has made it very clear that he considers it everyone's job to be both loyal and "nice" to him, personally — if they want to keep their jobs or get ventilators and masks so that the people in their state don't die. That means that as long as there is something he can do about it, there can be no such thing as an independent watchdog. The only way to keep one's job in the Trump administration is to be the Squeaky Fromme to his Charles Manson. There is no room for any Linda Kasabians in the mix. (Sorry, been watching a lot of documentaries lately) </p><p>This, unfortunately, is just how things are going to be until he is no longer president. Of course, given the way he's doing things, it is entirely possible that we will all be dead by then. </p><p>[<a href="https://www.nytimes.com/2020/04/03/us/trump-inspector-general-intelligence-fired.html" target="_blank">New York Times</a>]</p><p><strong>Wonkette is independent and fully funded by readers like you. Click below to tip us! Also if you are buying stuff on Amazon, <a href="https://www.amazon.com/ref=as_li_ss_tl?ie=UTF8&linkCode=sl2&tag=wonkette0f-20&linkId=e6057399a4696aad6e79c000ca483f54&language=en_US" target="_blank">click this link</a>!</strong></p><p></p><form name="donation" method="post" class="donation-form"><p class="subheadline">How often would you like to donate?</p><div class="form-row row--plan"><label class="plan-type__label"><input type="radio" name="plan_type" value="once" class="plan-type" required="" checked> Just once
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National Politics
Mitt Romney Coward Again
Maybe we should investigate the Bidens in Ukraine after all, says Romney!
March 06, 2020 05:10 PM
Oh, we were so nice to Mitt Romney for a minute there, when he decided to be the only Senate Republican with half a brain and a quarter of a conscience, and voted to convict Donald Trump on the abuse of power article of impeachment. Romney recognized that the House managers had proven their case up one side and down the other, that Trump had extorted a foreign country to announce fake investigations into the Bidens in order to help him steal the 2020 election, and that Trump had gone so far as to withhold aid from that country until he got that announcement.
He appeared to understand that all the shit about "Biden" and "Burisma" coming out of corrupt motherfuckers in Ukraine was false, and also Russian propaganda. Good job, Mittens! Strap the dog to the roof and take a road trip, YOU'VE EARNED IT!
This week, Mittens reacted to World's Stupidest Senate Republican Ron Johnson wanting to send stupid Russian propaganda-infused subpoenas in his Homeland Security Committee investigation into fake Biden Ukraine scandals, by saying that yes, it does seem that something like that might be viewed as li'l bit nakedly political and problematic, considering what Trump just did. He even said, "There's no question that the appearance of looking into Burisima and Hunter Biden appears political. I think people are tired of these kind of political investigations."
Correct as usual sometimes, Mitt Romney!
Anyway he's going to vote in favor of the subpoenas Ron Johnson wants, because coward.
<blockquote>Republican Sen. Mitt Romney of Utah plans to vote in favor of a subpoena as part of the Senate Homeland Security and Governmental Affairs Committee's investigation into Burisma, a key decision that could advance the GOP <a href="http://www.cnn.com/2020/03/04/politics/joe-biden-congress-investigations/index.html" target="_blank">investigation into the Ukrainian energy firm tied to Joe Biden's son</a>.</blockquote><p>Fun fact: Republicans hold an eight to six majority on the Homeland Security Committee, which means that if Romney had decided to have principles this month, at least some of the Senate Republican Biden Ukraine bullshit, which is 100 percent <a href="https://www.wonkette.com/lets-play-russia-if-youre-listening-mad-libs-come-on-itll-be-fun" target="_blank">working in concert with Russia</a> (NO COLLUSION!) to help Trump get re-elected, could have been stopped. </p><p>(We do not mean they are literally working <em>together</em> or the Senate GOP had a conversation with Russia where they said "LET'S DO A COLLUSION!" so cool your fucking horses and cram a Russian nesting doll up your ass without lube, <a href="https://www.wonkette.com/does-trump-campaign-not-realize-judges-can-actually-read-the-mueller-report" target="_blank">GOP.</a> We just mean the modern GOP helps Russia and hurts America every day.)</p><p>Point is, this shit wouldn't have made it out of committee.</p><p>But now it will!</p><p>Thanks, Mittens! Protecting democracy one day out of the year ain't that bad, is it!</p><p>Leaves the other 364 days a year for being a great big fuckin' coward. </p><p>What happened, Mittens? <a href="https://www.wonkette.com/donna-brazile-good-again" target="_blank">Ronna</a> give you a wedgie at the most recent Mormon Romney Family Magic Underpants Swap? Wouldn't put it past her.</p><p>And with that mental image esconced in your head, it's time for your OPEN THREAD!</p><p>[<a href="https://www.cnn.com/2020/03/06/politics/mitt-romney-supports-ron-johnson-subpoena-burisma/index.html" target="_blank">CNN</a>]</p><p><strong>Follow Evan Hurst on Twitter <a href="http://twitter.com/evanhurst" target="_blank">RIGHT HERE, DO IT RIGHT HERE!</a></strong></p><p><strong>Wonkette is fully funded by readers like YOU. If you love Wonkette, SUPPORT WONKETTE FINANCIALLY.</strong></p><p></p><form name="donation" method="post" class="donation-form"><p class="subheadline">How often would you like to donate?</p><div class="form-row row--plan"><label class="plan-type__label"><input type="radio" name="plan_type" value="once" class="plan-type" required="" checked> Just once
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