It's time to go to Denny's or IHOP for your late night grub, Fam. Even if Waffle House is the only 24-hour late night breakfast spot in your town, you’ve got to know by now you are taking an unnecessary risk walking into a Waffle House while being black. That’s if you even get in the door of course!

Run, Miss Girl, run! And please consider yourself fortunate for not having gained entry into that place! No doubt Waffle House would have found some reason or another to call the cops had you been allowed inside. That would have just spiraled into being assaulted and exposed, with the racist police department coming to the conclusion that any mouthy black girl deserves what she gets. Or you can look to the most recent example of a young black man getting choked and assaulted by the KKK with badges. What could he have possibly said to warrant this aggression. Oh, that's right -- it doesn't matter! Black bodies are so much racist fodder.


Seems like Waffle House is a guaranteed spot for racial violence, right? Well they do have a completely unsurprising long history of racism. In 2001, Waffle House was sued by members of a gospel group who were told to leave after taking a seat at the counter in Monroe, North Carolina, because some white folks needed the seats. That was 2001, not 1961. Monroe and Greensboro, North Carolina, are two hours apart and apparently still in bed with Jim Crow.

In 2005, a multi-state suit against the Waffle House chain alleged that blacks were being denied service or when they were, they were given "unsanitary food." Apparently Waffle House executive management chalks up their litigious history to one of the many pitfalls of being a large business.

We serve all races,” said co-founder Joe Rogers. “We’re just a target. We’re not guilty and never have been.

Of course not! Joe Rogers's own racist ignorance died with him in 2017 but Junior sure seems like a doozy. Seems Joe Rogers Jr. was recently embroiled in a yearslong sex tape case. His former housekeeper claimed harassment and Junior claimed extortion. All them isms do tend to go hand in hand, no? Helluva family institution, Waffle House!

Oh yes, racism is truly a "unique American phenomenon."

Protests have been scheduled to highlight the current spate of racist and documented Waffle House hijinx, with high profile activists beseeching change. C'mon, them the type of good ole southern boys that do not care about black folks protesting. The woman thrown to the floor with breasts exposed simply asked for a corporate phone number -- to lodge a protest -- and what did she get? She caught a case!

We just need to stop working there and stop trying to spend money there. Waffle House needs to be motherfucking deleted from our consciousness and cease to exist as an option all together. Waffle House is a set up one way or another. Y'all need to go start a Pinterest board with some white-hood-free late night dining alternatives and if there are none, get you some recipes to try at home. Their grits can't be that good!

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A Nice Lady

A Nice Lady is a not very nice third place winning Jeopardy! contestant mouthy black broad perpetually plotting an escape from corporate shackles...


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