Watch Out Virginia! Ralph Northam Held Down Your Mother While MS-13 Raped Her, With Votes
Republican nominee for governor of Virginia Ed Gillespie released a campaign ad earlier this week aiming to stoke fear in the cul-de-sacked bedroom communities of Northern Virginia. Because Democratic nominee Ralph Northam voted against a measure in the General Assembly which would have prevented localities from passing "sanctuary city" laws, the ad says, he would let MS-13 run wild through the streets and scenic byways of Virginia.
"Wait, what the hell are you talking about? Didn't we just have an election LAST YEAR?" you are saying to yourself, right now, after reading that paragraph.
Well, the Commonwealth of Virginia elects her governors in odd-numbered years following US Presidential elections so as to keep the riffraff and federal executive branch groupies from voting. Since the turnout will only be about half as many people as when Hillary Clinton won the state’s electoral votes in 2016, getting out the vote is critical for both parties. So Ed Gillespie needs significant portions of the conservative base to be sufficiently afraid to motivate them to vote. Let's watch the ad!
Since you people obviously are not watching it, it's some local news clips about MS-13 violence in Virginia and then some stills of Latino gangsters with face tattoos and of Ralph Northam through a spooky bluish sepia-type filter. Here is the transcript, conveniently lifted directly from Gillespie's campaign website:
Anchor 1: MS-13 appears to be surging again.
Anchor 2: The dangerous street gang MS-13 are responsible for the recent murder in Bedford County.
Anchor 3: Those crimes have been increasing around our region.
Narrator: MS-13 is a menace, yet Ralph Northam voted in favor of sanctuary cities that let dangerous illegal immigrants back on the street, increasing the threat of MS-13. Ralph Northam’s policies are dangerous.
Ed Gillespie: I’m Ed Gillespie, candidate for governor, and I sponsored this ad for a safer, stronger Virginia.
I AM AFRAID; CAN ANYONE CONSOLE ME?
Oh, thank you, ThinkProgress,for pointing out that the Gillespie campaign just grabbed a pic from a Google image search for "El Salvador gangster" and that those scary guys are not even in Virginia, nor are they members of MS-13. They are some other gang in El Salvador you have never heard of, so you don't even know to be afraid of them. You can read the Gillespie campaign's comment to ThinkProgress over there, but it boils down to, "They all look the same to me."
We should also note how they came to nail this albatross to Ralph Northam's ass, as told in the Richmond Times-Dispatch. As the Lieutenant Governor, he breaks ties in the state Senate (much like the vice president in the US Senate). This past session (which coincided with the gubernatorial primary campaigns), there was a bill before the Senate that was supposed to ban "sanctuary cities." Majority Leader Tommy Norment (R-JC Penney Boys' Department) was the last senator to cast a vote, and he voted against the bill to force a 20-20 tie. Lt. Gov. Northam fulfilled his obligation to break the tie and voted to kill the bill. Then, Sen. Norment made some parliamentary maneuvers to retake the vote, and the bill passed with his support.
BUT! Boring Ralph was on the record voting against banning sanctuary cities (ipso facto he is FOR GANGS). That very same day, the Gillespie campaign was running with the story. Undoubtedly, this swayed some racists who were still on the fence between Enron Ed and his primary opponent: Trump racist Corey Stewart.
In other adventures in PR at the Gillespie campaign, the boys are taking on another conservative boogeyman: The Washington Post. A couple weeks ago, campaign chairman Pete Snyder scrawled off a 750-word rebuttal to an editorial. WaPo told him they don't take unsolicited Op-Eds, but he's welcome to write a letter to the editor, which have a 250-word limit. Begrudgingly, Snyder killed his darlings, and WaPo ran his letter. However, the campaign is NOT happy with how the paper edited the letter, writing in a press release, "The piece was also reduced to 223 words — well short of the agreed upon word limit." You can read the original op-ed submission and the letter that eventually ran at the Gillespie campaign website. Frankly, the cut-down version seems to be represent the ideas in the longer piece pretty well.
In sum, vote for Ed Gillespie because he will keep Virginia safe from MS-13 violence by being a complete bitch about a newspaper's Letters to the Editor policy.