Wednesday Nice Time: Eric Holder Tells Darrell Issa to STFU


The hardest part of covering the political firestorms currently sucking all the oxygen out of the atmosphere is that nearly all of the players are such unlikable dicks. In fact, out of everyone in the media and every politician who has thrust his or her sneering visage in front of the cameras to uselessly bloviate and/or scare any small children who wander into the room while their parents are watching CNN, the only ones yr Wonkette has not yet wanted to strangle with piano wire are President Barry and Old Handsome Joe Biden (OHJB does not sneer, ever. He smiles grandly, warmly, holding us in the soft embrace of those pearly whites). Before clicking play on the above video we wondered who would be the first figure to make us <headdesk> until we had enough brain damage to qualify for disability. Would it be heavy-lidded bag of fail Eric Holder, a man of once great promise who now makes us tense up whenever he opens his mouth? Or would it be walking gonorrhea virus Darrell Issa, whose very existence is an affront to human dignity?

Luckily for us, Eric Holder is as sick of Darrell Issa as we are. So when Issa, in the course of a very civil exchange about a request for documents, decided to slip in a quick jab and then dance away, the Attorney General would not let him:

Holder: “I’m sure there must have been a good reason why only the to-and-from parts were---

Issa: Yes, you didn’t want us to see the details. Mr. Attorney General, knowing the two…

Holder: No, no, that’s what you typically do and I’m not going to stop talking now.

From there Holder essentially told the greasy, squinty-eyed weasel to STFU and DIAF, calling his behavior “unacceptable” and “shameful.” Clearly Eric Holder has had all he can stands and he can’t stands no more.

Of course Holder is just learning what all of us in California (outside his district anyway) have known about Darrell Issa for better than a decade, since even before the vulgar poop ferret tried to back-door his way (heh) into the governor’s mansion in Sacramento. At least he wound up giving us this classic:

And the laughs we still get watching that are the only remotely positive benefit Darrell Issa has ever provided his nation.




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