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You may have heard the SHOCKING! news that Wendy Davis, Democratic candidate for Texas governor and Yr Wonkette's 2013 State Legislative Badass, has written a memoir, Forgetting To Be Afraid, in which she discusses, for the first time, that she (shudder! gasp! hide the children!) had not one but TWO abortions: the first, in 1994, when she terminated an ectopic pregnancy, which doctors said was necessary to save her life; and the second, two years later, when her unborn daughter, whom she had already named Tate Elise, had "a severe brain abnormality" and would be in a "permanent vegetative state," if she even survived to term. It was, she said in an interview with Robin Roberts of "Good Morning America," a "tragic experience" for her family.

Or so she would have you believe. But these are lies, ALL LIES, and fortunately the intrepid conspiracy theorists at The Gateway Pundit have the real story (with bolding and ALL CAPS so you know it's true):

To label survivors of ectopic pregnancies as women who have had abortions is incredibly offensive to all those grieving women who WANTED their pregnancy.

Abortion is a choice.

Wendy Davis calls her ectopic pregnancy an abortion purely out of political expediency and not based in any medical knowledge. It is a tragedy that women DO NOT CHOOSE. Shame on Wendy Davis for using others’ trauma for her self-serving political tool.

How, you might ask, does investigative journalist Rachel Pulaski know that Wendy Davis has no idea what she's talking about when she refers to the termination of her ectopic pregnancy as an abortion? Because, duh, Pulaski asked a doctor. Which doctor? None of your business, it is "a licensed medical physician," and that's all you need to know. And this licensed medical physician told Pulaski the real truth:

An ectopic pregnancy is not a viable fetus and must be removed to save the mother’s life. The fetus cannot survive where it has implanted and must be removed or the mother will bleed to death. No medical professional calls the removal of an ectopic pregnancy an abortion. Nobody. We call it a laparoscopy or laparotomy for removal of an ectopic pregnancy. It is not an abortion.

We assume that The Gateway Pundit has any number of licensed medical professionals on its speed dial to anonymously opine on any number of issues that require medical expertise, and far be it from us to question the qualifications of this particular anonymous licensed medical professional. We will simply point out a few things.

Like, for example, that doctors frequently use technical terms for medical procedures, so whether it's a laporatomy or, say, a D&C, which is short for dilation and curettage (the most common type of procedure used to terminate a pregnancy), it's not unusual for doctors to say words other than "abortion" to describe specific pregnancy-terminating-and-or-fetus-removal procedures.

And let's also keep in mind that most of the "human life amendment" proposals do not include an exception for ectopic pregnancies. Backers of such amendments are quite happy to call treating an ectopic pregnancy an abortion, and besides, they're pretty sure it's not all that dangerous anyway. Needless to say, opinion is not unanimous on this question -- here are some Catholics arguing about whether saving a penis-home's life is murder or not.

Also, for another example, abortions are not defined by whether a non-viable fetus threatens the life of the mother. This, of course, is the rule according to "pro-lifers," who have insisted for decades that the termination of a pregnancy for any reason whatsoever is still an abortion, and Bad And Wrong and MUUUUUUUURDER, and you will burn in hell, you whore, for KILLING YOUR BABY! even if it will kill you first, or it's already dead inside you.

Remember, these are their rules. In fact, whenever "pro-life" legislators are debating new neat ways to restrict women's access to abortion, for any reason whatsoever because there is never a good reason for an abortion obviously, sometimes they will include a "life of the mother" exception, but often, they will not. Those legislators see no distinction between ectopic pregnancies and the regular kind. They see no distinction between pregnancies women have planned and wanted or pregnancies women do not want. Abortion is abortion is abortion. And it's all Bad And Wrong.

Except now we have this novel idea that if the pregnancy threatens the life of the mother, it isn't really an abortion at all because she wanted that baby, so therefore, Wendy Davis is a lying liar who lies. And how dare she insult all those women who've had to reluctantly terminate pregnancies -- without having abortions because they wanted those babies, so obviously it is not called abortion -- just to save their own lives. Shame on Wendy Davis for comparing their legitimate tragedies with her happy-go-lucky just-for-fun baby-killin', even though she had what The Gateway Pundit now recognizes is a legitimate tragedy, but she does not deserve sympathy because she's "Abortion Barbie," so there. Hmmph.

Excuse us while we climb up on our soapbox for just a moment to point out that this is exactly the point people who support safe and legal access to abortion -- like, hey! Wendy Davis! -- have been trying to make. Women decide to keep or terminate their pregnancies for all sorts of reasons, and none of them should have to beg and plead with their government for the right to save their own lives or determine whether and when to have babies.

That's why, last summer, Wendy Davis stood on her pink-sneakered feet and filibustered for 13 hours to try to stop Now-Indicted Gov. Rick Perry and the menfolk of the Texas legislature from passing yet further restrictions to make it that much harder for women -- some of them just like Wendy Davis -- to be able to make important health care decisions for themselves.

And that is why we want you to help us help Wendy Davis beat Texas Attorney General Greg Abbott this November. Because Texas women don't need another Republican governor who wants to legislatively mansplain to women what's best for them. They need Wendy Davis. And she needs our help. Please click here and show some Texas-sized love with your Texas-sized dollars to Wendy.

[ABC News/Gateway Pundit]

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