Donate

Who Will Be Next to Work With Scary Jim Webb?

John Warner is set to announce his retirement from the Senate in a minute or two (and probably will have announced it by the time we get this post up), setting up a total free-for-all in Virginia, where it was basically a given that he would continue being their Senator until the end of time. But one day someone noticed that John wasn't actually raising any reelection money or setting up a campaign, and now Republicans are going to desperately try to hold on to a seat that, a couple years ago, woulda been a total given. Let's take a look at some of the likely candidates:


Tom Davis (GOP)

Pros: Moderate, intelligent, well-liked.

Cons: Northern Virginia cake-eater, intelligent, supposedly a Christian Scientist but his wife is a doctor! Wtf is that about?

Jim Gilmore (GOP)

Pros: ...we've heard of him.

Cons: Mike Gravel is running a less embarrassing presidential campaign.

Mark Warner (Dem)

Pros: People in Virginia already conditioned to just vote for the dude named "Warner."

Cons:

PS If John Warner announces that he is running again just pretend this post is about 2014. It's the Friday before a three-day weekend, no one's paying attention anyway.

Va.'s Sen. Warner to announce 2008 plans [USAT]

Related: A Stroll Down John Warner Memory Lane [Extreme Mortman]

Donate

How often would you like to donate?

Select an amount (USD)

Newsletter

©2018 by Commie Girl Industries, Inc