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Wingnuts' 'We Are The 53 Percent' Just Proves Point of '99 Percent' Movement

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Right-wing hobo prince Erick Erickson started a cheeky conservative response to the popular "We are the 99 percent" tumblr with his very own "We are the 53 percent" site using the Republicans' parrot-poop false "point" that only 53% of Americans pay taxes. The site is remarkable only for the fact that the user-submitted stories are just as depressing and virtually identical to the "99 percent" stories, except that these struggling Americans are militantly defensive of their poverty and anusburgers. They are mysteriously very excited to spend the sum of their waking existence working bone-dissolving hours on the brink of a health problem-induced catastrophe! SO THERE, LIBTARD WHINERS. Let us read a few at random, for tears and misery and patriotism.


Food stamps and welfare, they are manna or whatever from Jesus! Which is how this person managed to start over, screw you hippies:

Oh god, this one is really depressing. This man, he has no health insurance and a near-zero wage, but he doesn't blame Wall Street. He blames only himself for being poor and barely able to survive despite working zillions of hours, as the Bible teaches us.

Yeah, SUCK IT UP, COMMUNISTS.

See, brainwashed tree dweller turds? Some people are HAPPY eking out the miserable existence equivalent of a Wal-Mart "63% off on laboring humans sale" working 394 hours a week for sub-living wages and no health insurance, why aren't you? Because you're complainers, which is ILLEGAL and UN-AMERICAN. Shut up and go watch Nancy Grace give free blow jobs to Satan on Dancing With the Stars, to remind you why America is still great. [We Are the 53 Percent Tumblr]
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Oh hi! Michael Cohen is going to jail, because he is guilty! Just like Paul Manafort is guilty and GO THE FUCK TO JAIL! WHERE HE ALREADY WAS! (Read up on that here!) And all this news came out in the same hour, somehow, because we live in the dumbest fucking episode of "Law & Order" Dick Wolf ever threw on the cutting room floor, on account of how it was too stupid for words.

However, Cohen avoided a big nasty trial (or series of trials, like Manafort opted for) by just cold pleading guilty to a buncha fuckin' crimes, like a crimer who does a buncha fuckin' crimes all the time. And he implicated Donald Trump in a couple of them!

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HOLY FUCK this afternoon! Michael Cohen just finished a hearing in a New York courtroom where he said, "DURRRR I AM SO GUILTY," but this post is not about that. This post is about how Paul Manafort verdict has just come out! He has been found guilty on eight of the 18 charges he faced in the Eastern District of Virginia (EDVA). The jury is hopelessly deadlocked on the other 10, and so a mistrial will be declared on those and Paul Manafort may get to be retried on them, in addition to his next trial over conspiracies against the United States and witness tampering, which starts next month in Washington DC. Maybe the government will decide Manafort is going to die in jail anyway, and play hooky from retrying those other counts. They probably need a vacay, don't you think?

Trump really does hire the best people!

NBC News's Ken Dilanian broke the news that Manafort has been convicted on five counts of tax fraud, one count of failing to report a foreign bank account on an IRS form, and two charges of bank fraud. The short version of that is that he is guilty of EIGHT FEDERAL FELONIES (so far) and he is going to jail for EIGHT MILLION YEARS for each count. (OK, that is probably not completely accurate. But still, welcome to prison, Paul Manafort!)

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