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Regretful teen-aged witch Christine O'Donnell has endorsed bland gazillionaire flip-flopper Mitt Romney -- or, to the Newt Gingrich campaign, Mitt Romney the cultist. Why endorse Mitt? According to O'Donnell's appearance on CNN this morning, it's because "He's been consistent since he changed his mind." Uhh.

We are pretty sure this development means Mitt Romney is going to dump his longtime wife and marry Christine ("to be more like Newt") and then be the goofy dullard businessman while unemployable housewife O'Donnell comically tries to "stop using witchcraft" (masturbating) while he's at work. This is Romney's "northeast strategy," we think.

Anyway, super exciting news, on the endorsement front: Christine O'Donnell has thrown the full influence and power of her never-elected national-joke status behind poor little rich boy Mitt Romney. Obama probably doesn't even have to campaign next year. [LAT/Think Progress]

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Ann Coulter is not impressed with Donald Trump's presumptuous plan to stop ripping babies away from their mothers and sending them to infant prison. For quite a while, Ann has been obsessively lamenting the very idea that American people even have children to "fill their lives with joy," but now (lol, "now") Ann has shifted her rage to immigrant people. Every time you watch her waving her alien-length arms around in a ritualistic frenzy over how shitty liberals are, just remember that we have already seen the emptiness of her soul laid bare. Remember that time she wanted to eat your baby because you got a tax credit?

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Screenshot- Right Wing watch via Fox News
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It's just another Wednesday in an America that snatched kids from their parents and locked them up in old Walmarts. Trump just signed an unneeded executive order ending his heinous child separation policy, but his "the bad guy mobster in a mobster movie" tactics might've had some permanent damage. What remains of the shriveled-up soul of the grand old poor-screwing Republican party has finally had enough.

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