WONKETTE WORLD EXCLUSIVE! MUST CREDIT WONKETTE!
Sources tell us that She Who Must Not Be Named has recently told friends that there is nothing to the BIGGEST DRUDGE WORLD EXCLUSIVE OF THIS WEEK! She's returning to the States before the end of the month; maybe this whole KerrySex thing will all have blown over by then. (We're bored, aren't you?)
We're especially relieved to pass this on, since it means we will no longer be haunted by the bizarre "Harold and Maude"-type mental images the rumor conjured. And we never really believed anyone would have sex with Kerry anyway.
Now let's get back to talking about those National Guard pay stubs and General Turnipseed!
Bush Orders Release of Military Records [AP/Yahoo]