Wonkette's Weekly Top 10 Has Gone Fishin', By Which We Mean Our Kids Went Fishing, This Work Never Ends
Everybody holding up? Anybody need anything? We've still got a few clams left in the can, if you need a thing and want to email rebecca at wonkette dot com for help! Don't be shy!
In the meantime, while you're psyching yourself up to ask for some social welfare like a common European, please to enjoy the top 10 Wonkette stories of the week, as chosen by the Founding Fathers. Those guys just stick their noses in EVERYTHING!
10. Republican Governors Explain, Poorly, Why They Are Being Coronavirus Idiots. So weird how people who don't believe in "government" are bad at "government."
9. Let's Go Shopping At YOUR Online Shops! Robyn collated all your Etsy shops for easy reference!
8. The 565,286 Worst Lies Fox News Is Telling Your Nana About Coronavirus RIGHT THIS SECOND. They were a lot of lies.
7. Which Inspector General Is Trump Saturday Night Massacring This Lovely Tuesday Afternoon? He's up to seven now, or at least that's what he's threatening.
6. California Gov Newsom Has Crazy Idea That Just Might Work. Doktor Zoom is our new Gavin Newsom correspondent, probably.
5. Dr. Fauci To 'Fox & Friends': F*CK YOUR FEELINGS. Waaaah, we are Fox News. Waaaaah.
4. Prancercise In The Time Of Coronavirus. Evan did some exercise. I told him to just address it to Callyson only, because none of the rest of you would be caught dead exercising. Did he? I don't know.
3. Jobless Floridians Will Starve Because Rick Scott Spent $77 Million On A Crappy Unemployment Website. Shit's fucked up yo.
2. QAnon Idiots Very Concerned About Mole Children Now. These people are not well. It is sad.
1. Let's Do MORE Shopping At Our Readers' Stores! And the second installment, for your reference!
There, now you have something around which to comment. We love you. Remember, Wonkette is ad-free and supported ONLY by YOU, if'n you want to keep us going through this fucking shit.
Rebecca Schoenkopf is the owner, publisher, and editrix of Wonkette. She is a nice lady, SHUT UP YUH HUH. She is very tired with this fucking nonsense all of the time, and it would be terrific if you sent money to keep this bitch afloat. She is on maternity leave until 2033.