WTF With Impeachment This Week And Like Such As? Let Us 'Splain You Easy!

Get ready, y'all, we are in for a WEEK in the impeachment inquiry of Donald J. Trump.

In case you've been wondering, ABC News/Ipsos did some polling this weekend on where people are after the first two big hearings, and we can report that everybody in America is on this plane right now, watching Marie Yovanovitch testify and going "Holy shitballs, this woman is incredible."

Just kidding! That is not what the poll says, and not least because it is unsafe to poll people when their trays are not in their upright positions!

Um anyway, what were we saying before we made that stupid and pointless joke? Oh yeah, POLL.

Poll says fully 70 percent of Americans think what Trump did to Ukraine (bribery, extortion, begged them to steal an election for him) is WRONG. Meanwhile, only one in four think he did nothing wrong.

Considering how Trump's historical ceiling for support has been around 40 percent, with the hardcore base being 30 or 35 percent, we'd say this means there has been erosion among the base. Indeed, when you look at the numbers from a partisan perspective, you find that 85 percent of Democrats say INPEACH and LOCK HER UP, but only 65 percent of Republicans say Trump did nothing wrong. (DEMS IN DISARRAY, EVERYONE!)

Now, to be clear, only 51 percent currently say Trump should be impeached and removed, whereas 13 percent say he did wrong, but he shouldn't be impeached or removed for it. So maybe some of his base is like "Yeah sure he did crimes, but he should NOT do the time," because of how they worship him as their lord and savior.

Still, though, these are not good numbers for a president who's just going into week two of public impeachment hearings. ABC News/Ipsos finds that 58 percent of people are "very" or "somewhat" closely following the hearings -- so far -- and that out of the "very" closelies, two-thirds of those agree that Trump should be INPEACH and LOCK HER UP.

With that in mind, HOO BOY, let's review what's a-comin' down the pike this week for President Crime Spree. As always Wonkette will be liveblogging ALL OF IT.

All morning hearings start at 9 AM Eastern, and all afternoon hearings start at 2:30 PM.



Lt. Col. Alexander Vindman, and Mike Pence's aide Jennifer Williams. They've been gunning for Vindman and calling him a double agent traitor spy ever since he came forward, and now their "star witness" is saying Vindman has "bad judgment." Meanwhile, Trump has been shit-tweeting Jennifer Williams the past couple of days as a "Never Trumper." So that's fun!


Kurt Volker, the former Ukraine special envoy who was part of the so-called "Three Amigos" leading crime foreign policy in Ukraine, and Tim Morrison, the NSC Russia dude who said Vindman had "bad judgment." (Seriously, read all about Tim Morrison, HE IS THEIR STAR WITNESS. He agrees with everybody else's accounts of Trump's crimes, but he doesn't think they are crimes, due to his legal expertise as Not A Lawyer.)



GOOOOOOOORDON SONDLAND! Yes, the man who told a whole Ukrainian Arby's that Volodymyr Zelenskiy LOVES DONALD TRUMP'S ASS PARTS and who also grrr argh-ed to Tim Morrison about how Rudy Giuliani "fucks everything up," will testify! (He is funtimes at quotes!) Unfortunately, he also has a bad tendency to "I do not recall," especially as pertains to crimes he may have personally carried out for Donald Trump. BUT we think at this point he's more concerned about protecting his own ass than he is about polishing Trump's ass to make it pretty for Volodymyr Zelenskiy, who loves Trump's ass.

What we are saying is that we cannot wait for Wednesday morning.


Deputy Assistant Secretary of Defense Laura Cooper and Undersecretary of State David Hale. Sorry for how y'all gotta follow Gordon, you guys :(



Former NSC Russia adviser Fiona Hill! She saw EVERYTHING.AND ALSO UPDATE! David Holmes, who heard Gordon Sondland on the phone with Trump, when Gordon said Zelenskyy loves Trump's ass parts and Trump loudly asked about the investigations he was demanding, will be testifying along with Hill.


There is no afternoon. Or, like, there will be an afternoon, but it won't have any testimonies in it. AFTERNOON WILL EXIST, EVERYONE, RELAX.

And that's what we know so far.

Get ready and get set and get go!

See y'all bright 'n' early, and now you may OPEN THREAD.

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Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the managing editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

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