Your Top Ten Is Fashionably Late, OK? FASHIONABLY.
Hello again! There was a bit of a mix-up this morning owing to the holiday... half week, and so I did not have access to the top ten posts earlier! But I do now! Isn't that exciting? (You: "It sure is, Robyn!") It is exciting. It is almost as exciting as the street fest going on outside of my apartment this whole weekend. Sure, it's loud, but it also means that I can get a piña colada in an actual pineapple any time I want and then go spend a stupid amount of money on jewelry that makes me look like a high school art teacher. It's like I'm living at a Sandals resort except I'm... still in Chicago?
Enough with the filler, let's get to the top ten posts of the week, shall we?
10. Louie Gohmert Has Thoughts About The Anal Opening. Louie Gohmert. The Anal Opening. Gohmert.
9. Teen Vogue: Wanking Is Magic
8. Happy Birthday America, Trump Got You This Constitutional Crisis
7. Diamond & Silk Know Who Did Slavery, KAMALA HARRIS
6. Looks Like Our First Dem Campaign Deathwatch Is Already Underway
5. WTF Happened With Mike Pence's Airplane Ride Today? It Would Be Irresponsible Not To Wildly Speculate!
4. Trump's Single Finger Salute To America
3. Oh No, BuzzFeed Is Being A Gay Homo-Fascist Again
2. In Which Junior Briefly Attempts To Accuse Kamala Harris Of Not Being A Black Person
1. I Think It Was The Fourth Of July
Those are some real nice posts, there! So if you missed one of them, you can go back and read it now! Isn't that nice?
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Robyn Pennacchia is a brilliant, fabulously talented and visually stunning angel of a human being, who shrugged off what she is pretty sure would have been a Tony Award-winning career in musical theater in order to write about stuff on the internet. Previously, she was a Senior Staff Writer at Death & Taxes, and Assistant Editor at The Frisky (RIP). Currently, she writes for Wonkette, Friendly Atheist, Quartz and other sites. Follow her on Twitter at @RobynElyse