Your Weekly Top Ten Cannot Get Over Revelation That Trump Is Racist

US of America News
Your Weekly Top Ten Cannot Get Over Revelation That Trump Is Racist

Oh hi! It's time for your weekly top ten post, which falls on a VERY WEIRD NEWS WEEK, because it is the week we SUDDENLY FOR THE FIRST TIME learned Donald Trump is racist. Whoa if true, riiiiiight? But there were also many other stories, and some of them are in your top ten list, which is below!

First though, let's ask you for money. You like that idea? YEAH YOU DO. You see, we have no ads, therefore all our operating expenses and all our salaries are paid by YOU! Yes, you right there, and you really are looking nice today. Wonkette is taking on new writers and trying to give raises to the ones who work eleventy-three hours a week already to tell you amazing stories, and we want to be able to do this MORE AND MORE, especially now that it's 2018 and we have a chance to TAKE THIS COUNTRY BACK! Or at least Congress! So please please please sign up to do monthly donations, so we can grow and grow! Will you do that? They can be small monthly donations, medium monthly donations, or YOOGE monthly donations. It takes all kinds! We even take thousand dollar and million dollar donations, OR MONTHLY MILLION THOUSAND DOLLAR SUBSCRIPTIONS, like if you are a secret famous celebrity fan of Wonkette! Seriously, if you are able -- DO NOT MONEY US IF YOU CAN'T AFFORD IT -- then pull out your wallet and sign up to throw money on our face every month! You can also pull out an envelope and stamp and send money to Wonkette, PO Box 361, Polson MT 59860 (new P.O box address! Update your address book!). Whatever, just please support us any way you can.

For instance, you could BUY ALL THE HATS! One says "IMPEACH!" (See below.) The others say "HELL. NO." AND "LITERALLY ANYONE ELSE 2020." Click here for more info!

There are many other products in Ye Olde Wonkette Generale Store! You should buy them!

Look, it's the traditional Wonkette Baby Donation Pressure Lion Of Cuteness, encouraging you to throw your wallets at us OW OW OW YOUR WALLET IS HEAVY LIKE A BRICK:


Did we mention we love you?

We shall now count down the top 10 stories of the week, chosen as usual by Beyoncé:

1. Roseanne Conner Does Not Deserve What Roseanne Barr Is About To Do To Her. Can't we just have a Darlene show?


3. It’s Real Fuckin’ Obvious Why GOP Didn’t Want Us To Read The Fusion GPS Transcript. And we would know because, again, we blogged it for SIX HOURS.

4. Camp David: Trump Holds DREAMers Hostage For Wall, Ryan Wears Questionable Outfit. Such a weird ass press conference last weekend.

5. All The President’s Lawyers: WTF Is Going On With Rod Rosenstein? We have so many questions, and we are WORRIED.

6. Trump Declares Self ‘Like, Really Smart,’ Not Dumb Like Everybody Says. If you have to say it out loud, it's probably not true, Donald.

7. Oprah 2020 Hopes Crash And Burn After Alex Jones Says Thing. RIP Oprah's presidential wishes!

8. Oprah’s Speech Was Amazing, Now Shut Your Fucking Mouth. Can you believe it was THIS WEEK we were talking about that? Seems like a million years ago. Every week is one long hell now.

9. Jake Tapper Disembowels Stephen Miller Then Wipes His Gut Blood On His Face Like In A Horror Movie. It was brutal!

10. Deleted Comments: The Swiss Are Working On An Artificial Vagina. Well all righty then!

So there you go. Those are your top ten most clicked upon stories, according to Beyoncé. They are very good stories!

Oh, hey, sign up for our newsletter RIGHT NOW DO IT DO IT DO IT:

You are very good, so here is a picture of Wonkette Toddler Human Woman wearing a sari:

OK bye.

Yours in baby Jesus,


Follow Evan Hurst on Twitter RIGHT HERE.

Wonkette salaries and servers are fully paid for by YOU! Please pay our salaries.

Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the managing editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

Follow him on Twitter RIGHT HERE.


How often would you like to donate?

Select an amount (USD)


©2018 by Commie Girl Industries, Inc