Streets of Washington Safe, Thanks to Us

After last weekend’s Collin Finnerty debacle (yes, we are taking full responsibility for the little prick’s assault conviction), we’re kicking ourselves for not catching this: the judge who cited us in court is the father of Daily Candy’s DC editor. Blogger Brunch Bird, with the assist:

Armed with the information about this father-daughter connection, I’m a little surprised that Bayly’s ruling in the Finnerty case didn’t come under the heading “All Rise (For Great Bargains)!” or didn’t include the words, “natch,” “gal,” or “yummy,” or close with him imploring those in attendance to go check out the 40-percent off sale at the Supreme Court gift shop down the street, because “You’ve totes earned it after sitting through this trial, darling.”

Remind us not to go on trial in this town. Though if it ever happens, we’ll just print ourselves an unassailable alibi in Wonk’d.

Order in the (Family) Court [Brunch Bird]