GOP to Push for Anti-Flag-Eating Amendment

This past Memorial Day caretakers at the Oak Hill Cemetery in Neenah, Wisconsin noticed that more than two dozen American flags were missing from the graves of military veterans. Who was to blame — commies? terrorists? beatniks? No, the answer was even more chilling: our so-called “friends” in the rogue animal kingdom.

For years — dating back, some say, to the start of the Bush administration — squirrels had been stealing and desecrating flags, shredding them for use as lining in their disgusting nests. Dozens were found in one such bunker in 2006.

But now, as the Iraq war drags on, other anti-American beasts are getting into the act. Even blackbirds are “trying to fly away with pieces of the flags.”

After their offensive raids, the animals mockingly leave behind the wooden dowels that the flags once so proudly flew from.

‘Critters’ Blamed for Missing U.S. Flags [WTOP]