• February 13, 2012
  • GOOD-BYE, VOTERS, I’M GOING TO PRISON! Convicted bribe-taking Alaskan state Rep. Vic Kohring spent his last hours of freedom today standing on the roadside with a home-made “THANKS ALASKA” sign, waving at people driving past him. He got caught in some Ted Stevens’ scam, and now he’s off to a federal prison in the Mojave Desert for up to 3-1/2 years. [TPM Muckraker]

{ 34 comments }

Doglessliberal June 30, 2008 at 4:19 pm

from Alaska to a low security day camp somewhere hot and sunny? The idiot himself has the chutzpah to say it is like a vacation!

SayItWithWookies June 30, 2008 at 4:20 pm

Hey at least he thanked them. Some representatives just slip away in the middle of the night and never write or call again.

stankfest June 30, 2008 at 4:20 pm

Maybe he will get some cool prison tatoos while inside.

Joey Ratz June 30, 2008 at 4:21 pm

If he’s getting 3 and a half years in the slammer, what will Ted Stevens get?

freakishlystrong June 30, 2008 at 4:23 pm

[re=27084]Doglessliberal[/re]: Maybe it’ll be more like a “honeymoon”, and he’ll be the wife…

Doglessliberal June 30, 2008 at 4:27 pm

[re=27090]freakishlystrong[/re]: ah, yes. That’s why he is so excited to be there.

carerer June 30, 2008 at 4:33 pm

He spent the whole morning rush hour on the highway shoulder and no one swerved to hit him. He should try it on the DC beltway.

WadISay June 30, 2008 at 4:34 pm

Alaska has roads?

freakishlystrong June 30, 2008 at 4:35 pm

[re=27088]Joey Ratz[/re]: With any luck, a ride on the Bridge to Nowhere…

Gopherit v2.0 June 30, 2008 at 4:39 pm

[re=27090]freakishlystrong[/re]: He should get a divorce then get married in the slam. Family values first, Kohring. No out of wedlock sex with your celly.

Why didn’t he roll over on Ted Stevens for a reduced snetence? Does his skeletal claw scare him that much?

Q2 June 30, 2008 at 4:42 pm

(hooh! aah!) (hooh! aah!)
(hooh! aah!) (hooh! aah!)

(Well, don’t you know)

That’s the sound of the men working on the chain ga-a-ang
That’s the sound of the men working on the chain gang

Gopherit v2.0 June 30, 2008 at 4:44 pm

[re=27104]Gopherit v2.0[/re]: or sentence even?

shortsshortsshorts June 30, 2008 at 4:46 pm

It would be better if they just dropped him off 20 miles Northeast of Ridgecrest and let him free. I would give him… 6 hours until death.

polar_bear June 30, 2008 at 4:48 pm

The thing about Alaska is that there aren’t really any rules. People kind of do whatever and assume it’s not a problem. Take for example, driving laws. Most roads are covered rock hard compacted snow most of the year, so people kind of just guess/create lanes at whim. Only during break-up does it become apparent that everyones been driving on the sidewalk. Furthermore, it’s hard to stop on ice-pack, so people routinely drive right through red lights. Marijuana laws? Not really. Gun laws? Haha. Alaska wouldn’t even take responsibility for enforcing many use-laws on its public lands, so Federal Agencies took on the burden. The point I’m trying to make here is that Alaskan politicians are all destined to be corrupt until this entire state sucked dry of natural resources and completely paved over.

TGY June 30, 2008 at 4:49 pm

One hopes he was generously splattered by mud from an eighteen-wheeler sporting a selection of truck-nutz.

SuperRounder June 30, 2008 at 4:49 pm

Hey Vic, watch out for your cornhole, buddy.

Godless Liberal * June 30, 2008 at 4:58 pm

[re=27088]Joey Ratz[/re]: Re-elected?

anabellum June 30, 2008 at 5:03 pm

is that sasquatch at the beginning of the video?…..

WhatTheHeck June 30, 2008 at 5:14 pm

Like all politicians in denial, Vic is already working his constituents for his re-election bid 3.5 years hence. In his mind, he has done nothing wrong.

Hey, maybe Dubya will issue a pardon before Vic sees the soap drop in the shower.

WaldoJeffersHead June 30, 2008 at 5:17 pm

Don’t drop the soap, Vic!

gurukalehuru June 30, 2008 at 5:26 pm

@gopherit v2.0 Maybe he did roll over on Stevens for a reduced sentence. Maybe they’re going to take Stevens out to the middle of the bridge to nowhere and throw him off. Maybe.

weirdiowasculpture June 30, 2008 at 5:31 pm

Vic Kohring is placed in a cell with a hardened, tattooed career criminal.

Career criminal: You wanna be the husband or the wife?
Vic (trembling): Uh, I guess, the husband?
Career criminal: OK, you can be the husband. Now get over here and suck your wife’s dick.

weirdiowasculpture June 30, 2008 at 5:32 pm

[re=27136]gurukalehuru[/re]: So that would leave Ted in the middle of nowhere?

Combover June 30, 2008 at 5:39 pm

You can ignore this. I’m just checking out my new avatar picture.

weirdiowasculpture June 30, 2008 at 5:45 pm

[re=27146]Combover[/re]: Try this one.
http://www.core77.com/reactor/images/04.05_combover.jpg

columnv June 30, 2008 at 5:53 pm

[re=27116]TGY[/re]: your response is excellent b/c you mention a “selection” of truck-nutz.

Causes the mind to wander…

Fata Morgana June 30, 2008 at 5:58 pm

Prison rape is not funny, as it statisticly happens to 18-year-olds who are slender of build and Gay, and thus do not have the strength or social network to defend themselves against a brutal, violent attack.

However, in the case of Vic Kohring, Ted Stevens, or (though this is just wishful thinking) Karl Rove, Prison rape is comedy GOLD.

Better have your wife stop off at Costco for the 50 gallon drum of Vaseline before her first visit, boys! And always remember to answer to “Sally” the first go-round…they get restless if they have to say it twice!

S.Luggo June 30, 2008 at 6:12 pm

How many years has that sign been sitting in Vic’s garage? I mean, Day-Glo is so 1980s.

Johnny Zhivago June 30, 2008 at 6:19 pm

Time to kiss the baby!

shortsshortsshorts June 30, 2008 at 7:53 pm

I, for one, am also in love with the grim reaper.

shortsshortsshorts June 30, 2008 at 7:57 pm

[re=27248]shortsshortsshorts[/re]: wrong post you shmuck.

Cape Clod June 30, 2008 at 10:14 pm

[re=27084]Doglessliberal[/re]: Your right. Maybe the politicians in Alaska would behave better if we built some gulags for them there. They also might behave better if they weren’t all Republicans but that’s only a theory.

The 3-Legged Man June 30, 2008 at 11:11 pm

You are a bit harsh on the Alaskans. I mean, only a handful of state legislators have actually been convicted. Don Young has barely spent $1 million of his campaign funds on attorneys and rightfully has refused to say why. Stevens only threatened to quit or have a depressive episode a few times when they were voting against drilling in ANWR. Lisa M only appears to have been appointed out of nepotism.

You really love to judge a state on a few anecdotal bits of evidence, don’t you? Yes, you do.

Terry July 1, 2008 at 9:14 am

[re=27115]polar_bear[/re]:

Imagine if you will, sitting at a red light in Anchorage in January with a tractor trailer in the lane next to you. The road is hard packed ice and snow. The light turns green. The truck starts forward a bit too fast and starts fish tailing a wee bit, right toward you.

Boy, does that get the old adrenals working first thing in the morning

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