• February 12, 2012

Flower necklaces are not cool, BarryOh dear. Looks like it’s about time for Michelle Obama to deploy one of those “he farts in his sleep and never flosses”-style truth bombs, because the Hawaiian Unicorn is getting a leetle too big for his britches. “I have become a symbol of the possibility of America returning to our best traditions,” Barack Obama told a group of House Democrats, who promptly wrote down this embarrassing quote verbatim and called up their reporter friends to tattle on him. Barry should take a page from our current president’s playbook and work on becoming a symbol of America returning to our worst traditions. [Washington Post]

{ 69 comments }

AfghanVet July 30, 2008 at 10:27 am

Egos cannot handle other egos when said egos get more props then their egos. Don’t hate the player, hate the game.

freakishlystrong July 30, 2008 at 10:28 am

“Hubris” is the new “Uppity Nigra”

EnBuenOra July 30, 2008 at 10:30 am

NO. It is NOT what he said:

A DEMOCRATIC SOURCE SAYS: “His entire point of that riff was that the campaign IS NOT about him. [The Post] left out the important first half of the sentence, which was along the lines of: ‘It has become increasingly clear in my travel, the campaign, that the crowds, the enthusiasm, 200,000 people in Berlin, is not about me at all. It’s about America. I have just become a symbol … .”

http://www.politico.com/blogs/bensmith/0708/Spinning_symbolism.html?showall

graceless July 30, 2008 at 10:31 am

Am I the only one enjoying this?

Frampton Comes Alive July 30, 2008 at 10:32 am
ManchuCandidate July 30, 2008 at 10:33 am

Can we parse this a bit, WaPo?

“I have become a symbol of the possibility of America returning to our best traditions”

I have to call bullshit on this meme as no egomaniac uses pansy ass words like “possibility”, they use definite words.

Just as Judge Dredd Sly Stallone once said, “I AM THE LAW!”
Or as Michael Keaton once procalimed, “I’M BATMAN”
General Douglas MacArthur, “I HAVE RETURNED.”

RuperttheBear July 30, 2008 at 10:35 am

He does fart in his sleep, but –so help me Jeebus– it smells like cinnamon. You think those are rolls down in the kitchen, but no.

And I’ll just let you guess what smells like bacon frying.

AngryBlakGuy July 30, 2008 at 10:35 am

…now that he is a “symbol”, can I replace the Jesus fish on my car with a picture of him?

magic titty July 30, 2008 at 10:36 am

[re=47544]EnBuenOra[/re]: Many thanks for this. I kinda really hat eht efucking media for the way the reinterpret what a person says to make him seem the asshole.

emo July 30, 2008 at 10:37 am

“Not about me”, wouldn’t fit the MSM, Obama is uppity theme of the week.

Darehead July 30, 2008 at 10:38 am

Farting in one’s sleep and never flossing?

Indeed, these are among the best American traditions.

Did George Washington floss his wooden teeth? No, he wanted to escape flossism and establish a free republic.

Did John Adams suck his butt cheeks in so as not to fart? Of course not. Why does WaPo hate the founding farters?

TGY July 30, 2008 at 10:39 am

[re=47544]EnBuenOra[/re]: Thank you.

magic titty July 30, 2008 at 10:39 am

[re=47550]magic titty[/re]: my bad, on the misspellings. but the medias are still punk bitches. that was the main point.

Serolf Divad July 30, 2008 at 10:39 am

Obama also once sad, and I quote: “I… am… your… God.”

confusionanddelay< July 30, 2008 at 10:39 am

I’m starting to think that Dana Milbanks might blow goats. What? You say he only said that he watched his daughter blow bubbles and pet goats? Whatever. Dana said he blows goats.

Larry McAwful July 30, 2008 at 10:40 am

Could popularity and appearing to be presidential hurt Barack Obama? Could John McCain’s flip-flopping and floundering help the Arizona senator? See tomorrow’s Washington Times for an in-depth look at the problems Barack Obama’s advantages will cause the Obama campaign, and the benefits that John McCain’s drawbacks will cause the McCain campaign. Take our poll: do you favor the popular and scary black man with the terrorist name? Or do you like the unpopular, brave, noble war hero who is the only decent human being in this year’s presidential race? We report, you decide!

user-of-owls July 30, 2008 at 10:40 am

[re=47547]ManchuCandidate[/re]: Alexander Haig, “I AM IN CONTROL HERE.”

confusionanddelay< July 30, 2008 at 10:41 am

Why would he floss? His plaque is made of fairydust.

Doglessliberal July 30, 2008 at 10:41 am

Oh no! Michelle is on Vanity Fair’s best dressed list, so the whole famly is going to be insufferable now. http://www.vanityfair.com/style/features/2008/09/bestdressed_slideshow200809?

( [re=47544]EnBuenOra[/re]: and this is really good to have, thanks. )

RuperttheBear July 30, 2008 at 10:43 am

[re=47549]AngryBlakGuy[/re]: Here you go. RIGHTEOUS.

Walter Sobchak July 30, 2008 at 10:44 am

Barack Obama IS aware of all American Traditions.

user-of-owls July 30, 2008 at 10:46 am

[re=47547]ManchuCandidate[/re]: of course, the relevant declarative for the McCain side would be Admiral James Stockdale, “WHO AM I? WHY AM I HERE?”

AnnieGetYourFun July 30, 2008 at 10:46 am

[re=47550]magic titty[/re]: Like the McCain rape joke? I think the MSM took that one too far. What? They didn’t cover it hardly at all? Well, surely he meant something nice by it.

MoodProcessor July 30, 2008 at 10:49 am

So, when do we get to kill and eat these BS artist c0cksucking reporters?

SayItWithWookies July 30, 2008 at 10:49 am

Pffft. Next they’re going to be saying he wasn’t even at the wedding at Cana.

AngryBlakGuy July 30, 2008 at 10:52 am

…this is so boring; someone wake me up when he starts turning water into wine or something.

ReelectTilden July 30, 2008 at 10:52 am

Well, I was a little worried when he visited Jerusalem that he would ascend directly to heaven from the Dome of the Rock.

Deepthroat July 30, 2008 at 10:54 am

So sorry for this selfish little post, but I figger’ why not use my valuable DC Wonkette resources… Anyone in DC area know of a good place (other than Craigslist) to find apartments in DC, Arlington or Alexandria area? I’m commin’ home! (submissions will be rewarded with a drink at the beautiful and prestigious Crystal City Restaurant)

freakishlystrong July 30, 2008 at 10:55 am

The “Librul” media sucks, they were drooling over this on MSNBC, they couldn’t waitto trash Obama. There must be a Gaffe Signal that goes up so the press can pounce on “bad” news about Obama, cuz if theres none out there, we can count on them to create it.

tsunami July 30, 2008 at 10:56 am

milbank is a twit.

and, anyway, o is our best hope for betterment. he is, dare i
say it…lincolnesque.

he even has the big tall hat…remember…

http://bagnewsnotes.typepad.com/bagnews/images/obama-abe.jpg

magic titty July 30, 2008 at 10:58 am

[re=47569]AnnieGetYourFun[/re]: Absolutely. They really stuck it to him for being and old prick, didnt they? And that time he called his wife a cunt. They raked him over the coals for being sexist. I remember fondly, Hillary Clinton talking about the sexism of John McCain.

But to be fair, most rape jokes are funnier the more debasing and racist they are. So, keep on keeping on, Walnuts.

4tehlulz July 30, 2008 at 10:58 am

See, this is objective media at work. WaPo smacks down one Obama smear, yet substitutes another to maintain balance.

Doglessliberal July 30, 2008 at 10:58 am

[re=47577]Deepthroat[/re]: try this–a friend got a nice one this way.
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/rentals/?nid=top_rentals

Delicious July 30, 2008 at 11:01 am

Shit. Where’s the liberal media bias when we really need it?

Losers.

policonoclast July 30, 2008 at 11:02 am

I can’t read this stuff when the new HILL’S 50 MOST BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE are out there to ridicule!!!

http://hill6.thehill.com/cover-stories/50-most-beautiful-people-on-capitol-hill-2008—top-10-2008-07-29.html

Buffy and Hildegard July 30, 2008 at 11:05 am

Time is on the ball as well: http://thepage.time.com/2008/07/30/obama-declares-the-moment/

God help me for what I am about to say, but I actually *gulp* agreed (sign-of-the-cross) with something Craig Crawford said, “even if it were true, don’t you have to be somewhat arrogant to think you can be president of the United States?”

Snarxon's Holler July 30, 2008 at 11:08 am

Hopey’s VP2B Tim Kaine will make Hopey look EVEN COOLER, with that 1930′s hair that brings to mind Lucky Lindy’s Nazi-sympathizing half-brother Jake.

Or maybe Uncle Cletus from Deliverance.

But where’s his axe-handle/banjo?

tsunami July 30, 2008 at 11:09 am

[re=47593]Buffy and Hildegard[/re]:

“I actually *gulp* agreed (sign-of-the-cross)
with something Craig Crawford said,…”

mmmmm…three Our Fathers and a Hail Mary ought to
put you back in a state of grace.

dustyrebel July 30, 2008 at 11:10 am

Let’s try it again…this time with the full quote:

“It has become increasingly clear in my travel, the campaign, that the crowds, the enthusiasm, 200,000 people in Berlin, is not about me at all. It’s about America. I have just become a symbol…”

http://marcambinder.theatlantic.com/

ReelectTilden July 30, 2008 at 11:13 am

[re=47589]policonoclast[/re]: Vito Fossella is one of them? Interesting choice.

Mo MoDo July 30, 2008 at 11:14 am

His turds have the smell and consistency of freshly baked rolls.

Buffy and Hildegard July 30, 2008 at 11:18 am

[re=47602]Mo MoDo[/re]: My Bear does not shit “turds” you vulgar racialist — he “passes” rainbows.

Frampton Comes Alive July 30, 2008 at 11:18 am

[re=47602]Snarxon’s Holler[/re]: No banjo–How about a harmonica?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=smvxB4RvOxQ

shortsshortsshorts July 30, 2008 at 11:22 am

[re=47599]dustyrebel[/re]: There is even more to the quote:

“Allah Dirka Jihad Allah destroy America hate whitey sherpa Jihad. It has become increasingly clear in my travel, the training, that Allah, the hate for America, bombing at least 200,000 people in Berlin, is not about me at all. It’s about a peaceful death. I have just become a symbol. Give me my 40 virgins, and some mother fucking ovaltene.”

WadISay July 30, 2008 at 11:25 am

In other news, Obama was reported to have done a ghetto crotch-grab and made a rapper-style hand gestures while hitching up his pants after taking a crap. No video exists of the episode, but the Obama campaign has not denied it, either.

AfghanVet July 30, 2008 at 11:29 am

[re=47589]policonoclast[/re]: According to NPR, at least 10 of them nominated themselves.

Snarxon's Holler July 30, 2008 at 11:32 am

[re=47606]Frampton Comes Alive[/re]: BOY HOWDY!!

Ain’t never seen khaki overhauls before!!!

lilblackcorvette July 30, 2008 at 11:35 am

[re=47593]Buffy and Hildegard[/re]: eggzactly

emo July 30, 2008 at 11:35 am

dana milbank – tired reporter doing tired reporting. Just “forgot” to include the whole quote, because it didn’t work with his tired theme

Washington Post:
ombudsman@washpost.com or call 202-334-7582.

magic titty July 30, 2008 at 11:36 am

[re=47607]shortsshortsshorts[/re]: And didn’t he quote the Ol’ Dirty Bastard’s seminal record “Dog Shit” right after that statement?

jamescarmel July 30, 2008 at 11:36 am

Barack Obama is aware of all of America’s best traditions.

/memed-to-death

AnnieGetYourFun July 30, 2008 at 11:37 am

[re=47583]magic titty[/re]: I’ve actually been mulling over the rape joke in my head for a while, trying to figure out if there is something that I’ve missed that would make it funny to someone who was kind of sick. And I got nothin’. Cultural reference from the 1870s that we just don’t recall, perhaps?

masterdebater July 30, 2008 at 11:38 am

“I have become a symbol of the possibility of America returning to our best traditions,”
I don’t know Barry. Down south they have some traditions we shouldn’t be too hot to return to, even if they consider them some of our best traditions.

Servo July 30, 2008 at 11:40 am

I found a Cheeto that resembles him. It’s a sign.

4tehlulz July 30, 2008 at 11:42 am

[re=47629]Servo[/re]: [re=47629]Servo[/re]: Dana Milbank?

Delicious July 30, 2008 at 11:43 am

I like Milbank. He can be pretty funny. The quote he had was probably all the quote he was given.

Honestly, I think this is a good little reality check for Obama. Personally, all this “being presidential” stuff doesn’t bother me and I see why he’s doing it, but I also see that it can irk others. He probably should shift gears and go hang out in front a closed Bennigan’s. What he can’t afford to do is pretend he’s above it all like Kerry did when he got Swift-boated.

In the meantime, fuck those stoopid lazy media whores!

Servo July 30, 2008 at 11:53 am

[re=47633]4tehlulz[/re]: [re=47633]4tehlulz[/re]: [re=47633]4tehlulz[/re]: Obama.

sanantonerose July 30, 2008 at 11:58 am

Snarxon, I KNEW there was something odd looking about Kaine. It’s mosdef the 1930s ‘do. Dude needs a fedora, stat.

pondscum July 30, 2008 at 11:59 am

[re=47589]policonoclast[/re]: I now understand what you locals mean by “hot for DC.” Yikes!

Deepthroat July 30, 2008 at 12:10 pm

Doglessliberal: thanks! finding a place in DC that isn’t +2K, sketchy or in bumfuck SUCKS

Snarxon's Holler July 30, 2008 at 12:19 pm

Having this recurring image/dream-sequence: of Elmer McFudd as Captain Ahab chasing the Gweat Half-White Wabbit. “Awwogant wabbit! Dwats!!!”

Probably shoulda skipped the mushwoom omelet for breakfast …

magic titty July 30, 2008 at 12:21 pm

[re=47624]AnnieGetYourFun[/re]: Well, think about that Vogue cover of Gisele and Lebron James, but instead, insert a large ape, and Fay Wray. And then the ape’s huge cock.

See, it’s funny, right? Rape. haha.

Tawmn July 30, 2008 at 12:24 pm

[re=47547]ManchuCandidate[/re]: I AM THE WALRUS –John Lennon

Clever_Sobriquet July 30, 2008 at 1:01 pm

[re=47552]Darehead[/re]: Founding farters? Excellent young grasshopper

policonoclast July 30, 2008 at 1:05 pm

[re=47614]AfghanVet[/re]: [re=47666]pondscum[/re]: [re=47601]ReelectTilden[/re]:

I know! This is rich soil, Wonketeers. My nominations:

Best name: Carl Baloney

Best WTF??: Rich Guerard (“Rich Guerard has tried his hand at modeling.” I read “yodeling” the first time)

Most attractive woman: Emily Zammit (#8)

Reason to hate her: “In other areas, she’s fearless. Zammit began horseback riding as a young girl. She loved it, got a grey horse she named Partly Cloudy, and eventually graduated to competitive horse jumping.”

yellowdogdem July 30, 2008 at 1:18 pm

[re=47636]Delicious[/re]: “The quote he had was probably all the quote he was given.”

Yes, exactly! What reporter would ever bother to do his own research anymore? I mean actually doing your job is so old school.

yellowdogdem July 30, 2008 at 1:20 pm

[re=47547]ManchuCandidate[/re]: Will Smith. “I am legend.”

slavojzizek July 30, 2008 at 1:36 pm

[re=47589]policonoclast[/re]: Hard to take it seriously, since numbers 1-10 aren’t Barak Obama.

NedPepper July 30, 2008 at 1:51 pm

New book title, “Mr. Trump meets Senator Obama, as ego’s collide”

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