• February 11, 2012

Uhhh
Your Wonkette was just having some drinks at various patio restaurants in downtown Minneapolis yesterday when strange dorks began walking around, in bizarre costumes. Here we have, uh, “Ninja Hitler,” maybe? And he’s pulling a gimp in a wagon made of … household garbage? Like many other disheveled stringy-haired losers seen around town on Sunday, the gimp was wearing a green scary-face mask, possibly from the Scream movies? But they weren’t all so elaborately costumed.

Tards
This, unfortunately, is the more common look for the ‘tards visiting the Twin Cities. Tragic.

Bye, Lamers!
Then they got on their bus and went home, the end. Ha ha, not really — they don’t have a bus.

Thanks for not having money so you don't ruin all the bars!
Here’s to you, Paultards! Like Sarah Palin, you are the comedy gift that just keeps on giving!

{ 39 comments }

Jill Sixpack September 1, 2008 at 1:53 pm

Ninja Hitler is a woman, baby!

columnv September 1, 2008 at 1:54 pm

wtf… balloons???

Gopherit v2.0 September 1, 2008 at 1:55 pm

Nice to see you’ve found something to do.

insert_namehere September 1, 2008 at 1:55 pm

Man, you guys have no compassion.

Actually, I’m thinking Ron Paul needs to be in the race, mostly because I have the BEST campaign slogan EVAH:

“Ron Paul – An excuse to get out of the house!”

El Bombastico September 1, 2008 at 1:55 pm

That’s a mighty fine-looking ironing board. Obviously not a Paultard, who are generally less concerned with the crispness of their clothing.

ManchuCandidate September 1, 2008 at 1:56 pm

Why does a Paultard need a Soviet uniform?

cheeto_christ September 1, 2008 at 1:56 pm

I see, he’s gonna iron his own shirts? and this is somehow related to Paul going for the PUMAS? I guess i don’t get it. Political theater can be so difficult to understand sometimes.

The Incomparable Tiny Valdez September 1, 2008 at 1:57 pm

Pic 2: looks like somebody is going to get ironingboarded. Also, great mullets.

A Geek Tragedy September 1, 2008 at 1:58 pm

“Paultard” will be the name of Bristol’s baby (if it’s a boy)

TheRealJimbo September 1, 2008 at 1:59 pm

Is she wearing a “Protect your nuts” t-shirt?

SuperRounder September 1, 2008 at 1:59 pm

Thank you Paultards. I thought the hurricane and the knocked up teenager would suck the funny out of this convention.

Lamers. Awesome.

The 3-Legged Man September 1, 2008 at 2:02 pm

Your picture shows that you have hotness potential. But why are you always shown with that inarticulate bearded guy?

shortsshortsshorts September 1, 2008 at 2:04 pm

These same geniuses were going up and down Montgomery Street here in SF chanting against the WTO. A few good people decided to go out and protest against the first amendment in response (yes we had signs). It seems the virus is spreading however. Good to see our faithful editors drinking a beer, however. Thank you for that.

mr.november September 1, 2008 at 2:07 pm

SKS eight months pregnant and drinking a beer?!?

If *your* water breaks, get on the Lamers bus and pop that puppy out.

shortsshortsshorts September 1, 2008 at 2:10 pm

[re=77768]The 3-Legged Man[/re]: Hey man, I know you’re kidding, but the bearded guy is pretty much a sex god. If you wish to get laid you must worship him. You have no idea how many times Ken’s topics and talking points have gotten me in the sack for butsecks.

itgetter September 1, 2008 at 2:10 pm

“Ha ha, not really — they don’t have a bus.”

Paultards do not need a bus. They have a goddamn passenger blimp.

SayItWithWookies September 1, 2008 at 2:11 pm

In the spirit of disaster recovery being a states’ rights issue, the Paultard convention is going full bore (as it were).

jokerontheleft September 1, 2008 at 2:11 pm

isnt that mask from V for Vendetta, and why would V and Ninja Hitler start hanging out….i need more perspective from those Twin cities.

zkemeny September 1, 2008 at 2:13 pm

The Libertarians are holding a CosPlay Convention?? Awesome!!!

And the “gimp” is wearing a V for Vendetta mask
http://vforvendetta.warnerbros.com/img/V4V_cover.jpg

Unfairman September 1, 2008 at 2:32 pm

It’s not a V for Vendetta mask, you smart people who don’t seem to know so much! It’s a Guy Fawkes mask. You know that guy, fox? Tried to blow up Parliament one day cause he was bored or something. I’ve been to London, and it’s not THAT boring, though being from America I could have used a good explosion here and there.

And being from Minneapolis, I can say that everyone from the TC carries ironing boards around. Boy Scouts were big around here back when I was a wee lad, and every boy was in it, though a lot of us dropped out when it was determined we actually had to “work” for “badges”. Who has the time? Anyway, the point is that the Boy Scout motto is “Be prepared”. You never know when if the occasion you’re attending will require pleats or creases in your pants, so it’s good to “b prpred”.

The Girl Scout motto, on the other hand, is “Buy Some Fucking Cookies, Please”.

Ken Layne September 1, 2008 at 2:36 pm

Oh come on you people, do not play along with the Paultards and act like you know about their favorite movie with Natalie Portman as Guy Fawkes.

grendel September 1, 2008 at 2:38 pm

That is clearly not Ninja Hitler… It’s a female ninja Stalin clone. C’mon people. Get with the program.

Oscar Folsom Cleveland September 1, 2008 at 2:44 pm

http://www.redpills.org/wp-content/img/HillaryWitch.jpg

This late entry, a guest speaker from the West…..

echoman2000 September 1, 2008 at 2:48 pm

The people you see when you don’t have a gun. But I digress.

Retarded baked Alaskan babies.

Virgin/non virgin muffin top pregnant bride for christ.

Water breaking in mid air.

Guns. Dead Polar bears. PTA president = czar of the complete universe (which is only 6000 years old, btw).

And why am I’m still sober? It’s past noon, for christ sakes.

Ladies and germs, John Water’s presents: PUSSY AND PIE in BREEDING OR DIE!

Staring: Megan Mullally as Pussy.

Abigail Breslin as Pie

Olsen twins as Trig and Track.

chascates September 1, 2008 at 3:07 pm

Gotta ask, what kind of local beers do these Paultards brew? Or is Hamm’s still the choice?

Steven Hyde September 1, 2008 at 3:07 pm

Wonkette posting from The Local. Outstanding! Hope you enjoyed a nice Big Ginger. I also hope you caught the Paultards on Parade down Nicollet yesterday. Slim Pickens on the missile was nice, though I couldn’t read the writing from my vantage point.

Cheers.

–Hyde

schvitzatura September 1, 2008 at 3:12 pm

Cue to ~1:09

We’re gonna find out where you Ron Paul fans stand!

kellygrrrl September 1, 2008 at 3:17 pm

will Barbie and Skipper be rocking some cool military ensemble?
I thought they were coming in their rain gear

Hurricane MkKain 08

The 3-Legged Man September 1, 2008 at 3:19 pm

Wow, this thread really has traction. 28 comments….

oh, look! a new comment on the Bristol Palin thread! See ya! Love ya!

DoctorCulturae September 1, 2008 at 3:27 pm

ooh those suds looks makes hmm I am mmm. Excuse me, off to the fridge for a Leinenkugel Octoberfest.

ladymacbeth September 1, 2008 at 4:47 pm

i think the first picture is a scene from ‘endgame’.

RuperttheBear September 1, 2008 at 5:25 pm

Did you kick their babies again?

no_u September 1, 2008 at 6:46 pm

#1 *is* Guy Fawkes, but more accurately, it’s Epic Fail Guy:

http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Epic_Fail_Guy

brown_recluse September 1, 2008 at 10:11 pm

Amy Goodman gets arrested but these cosplay psychotics roam free?

SovietShark September 3, 2008 at 6:30 pm

Hahhahaha…. I am now a female ninja Stalin clone? That’s really great. What made me laugh the most was the Ninja Hitler bit.

I didn’t realize the Minnesota Anonymous (mnraid.org) movement against Scientology was related at all to Ron Paul. We stumbled along the “Liberty Parade” and took our chance in it, and it went amazingly well. Anonymous and politics? Rubbish.

As for my uniform… I have 4 of them. Yeah, they are all uniforms of the former Soviet Union. Not much of a commie, and even less of a Nazi. But damn, if I wasn’t then why would I wear something like that?

Anyway, you guys gotta decide; Ninja Hitler or female ninja Stalin clone? I will be watching.

Alan Scott September 4, 2008 at 2:46 am

Stalin clone, Stalin clone. You Commie bastard. :-p

Altanon September 4, 2008 at 6:40 pm

Wow this article Fails, Ken Layne please do research before posting misleading or wrongful information On the internet yea i read it but wow this article fails.

As for Sovietshark i think you look more like a Female Hitler who had Buttsecks with a Stalin clone and 9 months later they had you=D

this Link here will help you do some research Ken (http://www.libertyparade2008.com) same with this one (www.google.com)

Thanks for your time
-AltAnon-

incognitus September 4, 2008 at 8:38 pm

Wow, I will be shocked and appalled if anyone takes such unresearched and poorly written drivel like this as newsworthy. This sort of “lol im so funy” approach with it’s weak insults to try to get a rise out of the readers is basically on par with blogs written by eight-year-olds who lie and click the “Yes I’m over 13″ link on Livejournal. The only fact I can find in this entire “article” is that Minneapolis has several patio restaurants that serve drinks. Congratulations. I hope in the future you learn to do homework and not just post your “lol paultards are funny because everyone says so” BS.

And no, I’m not a Ron Paul supporter. I just don’t think it’s fair to criticize anyone without information. That includes Paul supporters, Palin, and the Anonymous members in the first photograph on this page. Do your homework, man.

King Nerd September 10, 2008 at 12:18 pm

Speaking of getting educated. Minnesota Anonymous will be strutting our stuff for the eigth time in as many months right outside the Minneapolis $cientology office this Saturday, Sept 13th from 11am-4pm. 1011 Nicollet Ave. You could probably write about that instead of bawwwing about some old guy that doesn’t have a snowball’s chance in Hell of winning the election.

Besides, rumor has it the cult of $cientology paid some monies to fund Ron Paul’s campaign, in direct opposition to the clauses in their tax-exempt status. So, its not like you wouldn’t still get some anti-Paul chuckles out of it.

Also, I vote Ninja S.S. Jury is still out on whether SovietShark is male or female.

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