• February 13, 2012
  • HA HA HA WE MET THIS GUY IN ST. PAUL: This dude Tim was walking around The Liffey telling everybody about his great idea to start a fundraising site for Barack Obama’s brother in Kenya, and Ken kept asking him if Obama’s brother would need an iPhone. “It’s got GSM,” he said, and this Republican tool wandered off in bafflement and disgust. [Help Obama's Brother]

{ 33 comments }

Gopherit v2.0 September 11, 2008 at 11:36 am

What? You mean a republican wants to buy a poor person something other than bootstraps?

Delicious September 11, 2008 at 11:36 am

call Tim at 612.327.4152

SayItWithWookies September 11, 2008 at 11:37 am

What’s that word for when you set up a charity and then keep the money? Oh, it’s on the tip of my tongue. I think it rhymes with “flawed.” Rats, I wish I could think of it.

Gopherit v2.0 September 11, 2008 at 11:40 am

[re=92483]Delicious[/re]: I know. I was tempted to put him on the Mormon and Scientology “Visit/Call me” pages.

StripesAndPlaids September 11, 2008 at 11:42 am

Gee, they want to help Obama’s brother. That makes them magnanimous do-gooders doesn’t it? They should get some kind of award for being so self less.

Toonces September 11, 2008 at 11:48 am

How about we establish a “Send Tim a one-way ticket to Kenya fund”

WadISay September 11, 2008 at 11:49 am

If Tim’s last name was Pawlenty, that’s the governor. After the convention, most Repubs went to north Minneapolis to hunt the poor with high power rifles and night vision glasses, or ride them down in their SUVs. How awful for you, having to endure a whole convention hall of these pumped-up douches and their elbow in the ribs yuks.

Call me stormy September 11, 2008 at 11:50 am

You know what would help the dude? A visa.

Texan Bulldoggette September 11, 2008 at 11:50 am

Well, if any Republican actually did help Hopey’s brother that would be more than any Republican has ever done for black person since….EVER.

StripesAndPlaids September 11, 2008 at 11:55 am

Barack Obama doesn’t care about black people.

ManchuCandidate September 11, 2008 at 11:56 am

Why would a real Repub he-man would want a GSM based cellphone? Damn Frenchies invented that and it’s used by pretty much everyone outside of US America. A CDMA cellphone would be a perfect gift for that douchesack to send to Barry’s destitute half bro. Much like Repub Foreign policy, it’s a military solution (CDMA was originally used in military radios), expensive (CDMA phones cost more due to licensing fees for Qualcomm), unreliable in an urban environment and useless outside of US America.

grendel September 11, 2008 at 11:58 am

[re=92524]Texan Bulldoggette[/re]: That’s not true… only since Lincoln.

grendel September 11, 2008 at 11:59 am

[re=92530]ManchuCandidate[/re]: Send him a CDMA phone and a military issue arctic combat parka. That would be a classic mind fuck.

Texan Bulldoggette September 11, 2008 at 12:01 pm

[re=92536]grendel[/re]: I know–I just hate to lump Lincoln in with Republicans.

grendel September 11, 2008 at 12:03 pm

[re=92539]grendel[/re]: Oh, and all of the “McCain / Romney” shirts Mittens had printed up that he doesn’t know what to do with now

grendel September 11, 2008 at 12:04 pm

[re=92543]Texan Bulldoggette[/re]: I want to see a Zombie Lincoln kicking John McCain’s ass and eating Karl Roves (and thus Dubya’s) brain..

Johnny Zhivago September 11, 2008 at 12:04 pm

The joke of it all is that Kenya probably has a faster, more reliable GSM network than we have in the US.

Texan Bulldoggette September 11, 2008 at 12:04 pm

[re=92543]Texan Bulldoggette[/re]: I think if Lincoln were alive today he’d probably be a Paultard or an Independent at the least. Seems like he didn’t hate the colored folks the way the modern Repubs do.

Lionel Hutz Esq. September 11, 2008 at 12:05 pm

Of course they need to get him a phone. How else will you be able to cruise him for buttsex unless you can call him up when you are lonely. Republicans are practical that way.

Still, I’m pretty sure I must be a half brother of Obama somehow…, so how ’bout starting a fund for me?

Oh, by the way, 9/11!

Da Derga September 11, 2008 at 12:05 pm

I love that just above the “Donate” button, it says: “Help a Brother Out”. It just gives an extra kick of racist douchiness.

Gopherit v2.0 September 11, 2008 at 12:05 pm

[re=92523]Call me stormy[/re]: Fat chance. A black muslim would need to be a member of the president’s family to emigrate here.

Johnny Zhivago September 11, 2008 at 12:06 pm

[re=92539]grendel[/re]: Even better, send him one of these:

http://uflarkistan.com/teleflark.htm

Gopherit v2.0 September 11, 2008 at 12:06 pm

[re=92516]Toonces[/re]: Simple enough. Tim can join the Army.

JadedDIssonance September 11, 2008 at 12:07 pm

Um, and it’s his “Half-Brother.” We all know those aren’t real.

botlrokit September 11, 2008 at 12:07 pm

[re=92524]Texan Bulldoggette[/re]: …since making the suggestion that victimless crimes shouldn’t be imprisoned?

oh, sorry. That wasn’t a republican suggestion, wasn it?

Texan Bulldoggette September 11, 2008 at 12:10 pm

[re=92558]JadedDIssonance[/re]: Yeah like Cindy’s two half sisters living in trailers next to a Joshua tree in the desert. Maybe Howard Dean could start a fund for them.

Lionel Hutz Esq. September 11, 2008 at 12:12 pm

[re=92552]Da Derga[/re]: Well, it used to say “Can a Nigger get a break?” So they have improved it slightly.

Texan Bulldoggette September 11, 2008 at 12:12 pm

[re=92559]botlrokit[/re]: Errr…you lost me. How do you imprison a victimless crime? When did I talk about crime–victimless or otherwise? Translation: I have no idea what you’re talking about.

botlrokit September 11, 2008 at 1:07 pm

I was slightly agreeing with you. Apparently not in my (or your) native tongue, my bad. You’ll have to forgive me… liquid lunch.

Texan Bulldoggette September 11, 2008 at 1:19 pm

[re=92685]botlrokit[/re]: No worries. Cheers to early TGIF!

natoslug September 11, 2008 at 1:56 pm

Cool. I just signed “Ted” at mrproducer13@gmail.com up to receive the Scientology Volunteer Minister newsletter. I think I’ll skip work for the next hour or so and find some other information that Ted might be interested in. Anybody know of some good bestiality sites that require an email address?

natoslug September 11, 2008 at 2:09 pm

Stupid me. That should have been Tim, not Ted.

Canmon (the Inadequate) September 11, 2008 at 4:47 pm

Can someone also help out Cindy McCain’s half-sister?

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