Regular readers may remember a golden period of mockery over the summer regarding the American Family Association’s “Boycott McDonald’s” initiative, in which a bunch of fat slobs ceased taking their 12 kids to McDonald’s 78 times a week because some vice president gave money to some San Francisco gay cause once. There were funny comments and we laughed, because who were these fucking people just cold validatin’ every stereotype about Bitters? And yet, McDonald’s has now caved in to their demands to remain “neutral” in the “culture wars,” which these fundie idiots think is an actual hot war between Orcs and Dwarves.
From the Boycott McDonald’s site:
Great news! Because of AFA supporters like you, McDonald’s has told AFA it will remain neutral in the culture war regarding homosexual marriage. AFA is ending the boycott of McDonald’s. As you know, AFA called for the boycott in May after McDonald’s joined the National Gay and Lesbian Chamber of Commerce (NGLCC).
McDonald’s said it’s Vice President, Richard Ellis, has resigned his position on the board of directors of NGLCC and his seat on the board will not be replaced. McDonald’s also said that the company has no plans to renew it’s membership in NGLCC when it expires in December.
In an e-mail to McDonald’s franchised owners, the company said, “It is our policy to not be involved in political and social issues. McDonald’s remains neutral on same sex marriage or any ‘homosexual agenda’ as defined by the American Family Association.”
“I wanted to leave a comment, but there is no way to type a comment in.”
Announcement [Boycott McDonald's via Radar]
{ 96 comments }
Spineless BurgerMongers make me…Grimace?
Yes, the AFA can claim victory, McD’s can sell their “food” to morans and the same dumbass morans can go back to killing themselves slowly by eating McD’s “food.” It’s win win win.
Great, now the AFA can get back to doing what they do best, cheating on their wives with other men.
Now Ronald McDonald is going to have to go back to soliciting sex in airport bathrooms and rest stops. You ever see a clown penis come through a glory hole?
Were Ronald McDonald and the Hamburglar forced to resign too? They’re a couple raging homosexuals if I’ve ever seen one.
Damn! Now I have to give up Egg McMuffins! @#$!
So, now Wonkette will lead the way in boycotting McDonald’s for giving into the bitter, heteros? Let’s threaten to take our sodomy elsewhere.
They melted just like cheese on a Big Mac when it came to pressure.
Owner and founder of McDonalds Restaurants Inc, Ronald McDonald, has remained quiet on the issue, choosing only to smile and spread his arms in a welcoming pantomime
“I wanted to leave a comment, but there is no way to type a comment in.”
HA!! I’d forgotten that line originated from this particular retardfest. It remains my favorite thing ever written on the internet.
Folks are going to have to suck it up (pun intended) and bite the bullit (ouch), because everyone eatin’ out (HA!) at Ronald’s house from now on.
Okay enough.
[re=129685]StarkRavingMan[/re]: New rallying cry for teh bitters: Four Bucks for Coffee is Just Stupid.
Who needs McDonalds when we have Connecticut.
Yes! This will finally stop all that awful butt sex.
Ronald is teh ghey? I thought he was just another ICP fan.
I seemed to recall reports that the “boycott” had no measurable effect on Mickey-Dees sales. It will be interesting to see if they get a bump now.
Though that’s doubtful unless the child care system in Nebraska negotiates a catering contract with McDonalds since that’s where the bitters have dumped most of their mutant spawn.
This is great news — now I don’t have to be ambivalent about my loathing for McDonalds. Unmitigated contempt is back!
To think the theists bitch about us atheists. Well, at least they can get back to soliciting gay sex in bathroom stalls.
I can’t boycott McDonald’s. I depending on their Monopoly game to make me a millionaire since my 401k is now empty.
Time for the big RMcD to go back into the closet and become Jack-in-the-Box.
[re=129707]Worlds End[/re]: Specifically, McDonald’s bathroom stalls.
[re=129706]SayItWithWookies[/re]: On the other hand, it would be kinda cool if a coupla gays in Connecticutt had their wedding at a McDonalds.
I hope all the AFA members die from eating this crap and/or being sodomized in the bathroom of McDonald’s.
Fuck you McDonald’s
Today Micheal Moore is a conflicted man.
McDonald’s is still in business?
I’m confused: does this mean I have to stop cruising for man sex in Mcdonald’s bathrooms, drive-throughs and french fry areas?
I can haz cheeseburger?
Hah! Wingnuts don’t know the difference between its and it’s! The AFA loses the grammar war!
Sigh.
“our policy to not be involved in political and social issues”
Yea sure, Ray Kroc – McDonald’s founder – sent half a million in illegal campaign contributions (illegal even in 1972) to the Nixon slush fund which paid the Watergate McBurglars. In return, Nixon pushed through a bill which limited the minimum wage and limited employee benefits to people over 21. For the following three decades, unless you were over twenty one you could not get minimum wage on a job and could not get more than 32 1/2 hours a week work so to avoid state laws which tried to circumvent the “Ray Kroc Minimum Wage Law”. The limitation on employee benefits for persons under 18 still remains.
Whew! Now all these surly fatasses can go straight, (pun NOT intended), from the Palinberg rallies to stuff their ugly, rascist pieholes with junk. Hatin’ works up an appetite!
McDonalds sucks cocks.
Oh wait, or does it? I’m confused.
No more happy meals for Ronald out back.
“McDonald’s said it’s Vice President, Richard Ellis, has resigned his position on the board of directors of NGLCC and his seat on the board will not be replaced.”
Arrrrrrrrrgh! It’s “its,” you lard-luvvin’, crucifix-humpin’, barely bipedal morans. Oh, and the new AFA slogan should be “We put the BOY in boycott…” Just saying.
Thank god!! Now I can restart special ordering mayo on my quarter pounder.
Does it make me an elitist if I haven’t eaten mcd’s “food” since I was 12? I would like to think so, cuz that is some serious cred.
Orcs and Dwarves?
Orcs and Hobbits. Always Hobbits at Our Wonkette.
[re=129727]Whiskeybaby[/re]: It does, it just remains neutral about it…
Well, considering something like two-thirds of Americans oppose gay marriage, I’m not surprised they’d cave. At the end of a day of reading Wonkette, I’m always happy to be living in Canada. That whole gay marriage thing was so 2003. Companies here trip over themselves to support gay rights. Y’know, as if they were humans or some shit.
Actually, this is just McDonald’s secret guerrilla war against the bitters. Now they can come back to the Golden Arches to fill their lardasses with trans-fatty goodness until their hearts explode and then when they are all dead the world will rejoice in a glorious homosexual orgy.
Why can’t Barack Obama admit that the surge won the culture war?
…they will need as many inbred fat-asses coming through their doors as possible during the impending depression. And for that exact same reason I believe they should have held out. When all of us are begging for change on a corner, the only food we will be able to afford are double cheeseburgers off the dollar menu.
I was always uncomfortable siding with McDonalds on anything. I welcome this totally meaningless change.
This has nothing to do with the gays, but I had a McRib sandwich the other day, and it was truly horrific. I remembered them fondly from my youth, but it turns out I must have been an idiot as a youth, because this was one horrible sandwich.
Does that mean that the McDonalds board of directors will all have to get gay divorced now?
[re=129712]4tehlulz[/re]: yep
Are the bitters screaming “Kill Him!” to Ronald, too?
Ugh, thank god. Take anymore apple-pie-related 3rd-degree burns the roof of my mouth can not.
And for the record, my new ceremonially-committed same-sex partner and I just want equality under the law, not the “sacred” label of “married” branded on to our foreheads by your Magic Sky Daddy.
Fine. Have it your way.
Orcs and dwarves… Jim, it’s very clear you play Warcraft. It’s okay… there’s nothing wrong with that. You can come out of the closet, man. What server are you on? Are you in a raiding guild?
And the most important question… do you play the hardcore straight Horde, or the gay republican Alliance?
Oh, great, now I have to boycott McDonalds. Oh, wait, I never ever fucking go in there. Carry on then.
[re=129710]dano[/re]: me too
It’s Adam and Eve, not Ronald and Mayor McCheese.
I guess its time fire back up my http://www.boycotttheafa.com website purchased during the height of the crazy fun.
Haha. Now these fucks can go back to loading up their kids on Mickey-Dees. Then they can all die of obesity, heart disease, and diabetes, but not before they spawn another generation of hulking, ignorant losers.
Well played, McDonalds, well played.
You god somethin’ against orcs and dwarves? I tell ya, Thrall would cut through this shit quick if he was President. He wouldn’t care if you’re gay, straight, undead, cursed with an extradimensional plague, whatever. If you can wield a two-handed axe, you’re fine by him. President is kind of a step down from Warchief, though.
BattleAxe Party: THRALL/BRONZEBEARD ’08
Change we can cleave in!
[re=129724]Spirochete[/re]: Extraneous apostrophe’s — they were good enough for Jesu’s, they’re good enough for me!
[re=129756]checkonechecktwo[/re]: Congrats on the commitment! Wait…that doesnt’ sound right…
[re=129738]mattbolt[/re]: Quit bragging about your dumb progressive country with your stupid treating people with equality. When was the last time the least intelligent members of your society organized to force a fast-food chain restaurant to make a totally meaningless gesture undertaken only to placate a group of people who think dinosaur bones are a trick by God to test our faith?
Curley: I don’t know how relevant your point is. After all, Obama was only 10 years old when that law was passed, and McCain was only 89.
[re=129761]Reefpilot[/re]: Actually that could be a Warhammer reference for the keen eyed…
Goddamnit. Nerd talk on Wonkette. My two sick obsessions have merged.
[re=129761]Reefpilot[/re]: http://www.wowarmory.com/character-sheet.xml?r=Moon+Guard&n=Sussemilch
Fuck you Kroc and Fuck that shitty food. Gays don’t fuckin eat that shit anyway. I mean, have you SEEN us lately? Puuleez, mayor mcheez…
Yeah, Ellis will just give his bonus money, which he will up about the amount of the donation, in private and take the tax break himself.
Whatever.
Leave it to the wingnuts to ignore the 1,389,843,836 legitimate reasons to boycott McD’s, and pick the one that doesn’t even make sense, and then declare a victory when the status quo is restated to them. Well played, fundie ‘necks. Well played. Give yourselves a Double Quarter Pounder With Cheese and Supersized Fries. I hear Mickey D’s is doing the Monopoly game now!
Off topic, but is Ronald’s you know, cock, like striped or something?
[re=129714]SayItWithWookies[/re]: Yes, after winning a million from the Monopoly game. They’d invest it in astroglide, ’cause, ya know, we’re all bottoms now, like it or not…..
super-size my boycott please.
their fries suck anyway.
[re=129689]mattbolt[/re]: Saving his equally wide stance with his legs for the stalls?
[re=129759]Ilikepigeons[/re]: WIN.
[re=129740]evilbilly[/re]: Totes true. Everyone knows that teh gayz are very, very fit.
[re=129682]Outstando[/re]: I hope someone didn’t beat me to this: the great thing about the clown glory hole is that they somehow fit a THOUSAND penises into it.
I will no longer think about Big Macs in the middle of hot hot gay sex.
[re=129725]JamesMichaelCurley[/re]: Well, yeah, Ray Kroc was a crock, but then his wife died and left all that money to NPR. You’d think karma would give us a better balance than “Story Corps.”
Is it a surprise that McDonalds would give in to Big Fattie? They’re pandering to their base.
I was always wierded out when I saw McDonald’s listed under “restaurants” in the phone book. McDonald’s is a restaurant?
Well now it’s even weirder. McDonald’s is “neutral in the culture war.” What does any of that have to do with cold congealing sticks of frozen potato in a grease-stained paper envelope, or a thin disc of overcooked meat-substitute dripping hormones and transfats onto my axle-grease stained fingers while my congesive-heart-failure wife “diets” in the passenger seat by refusing to supersize her frozen whipped corn-syrup “strawberry shake”? What culture war? We’re just stopping by our local McDonald’s “restaurant”!
[re=129779]magic titty[/re]: Good news Angry! Diets high in sugar, fat, preservatives and sodium are known to lower sperm counts and cause more frequent miscarriages-one or two more generations and the McDonald’s lovin’ crowd could be extinct!
and of course the people’s republic of venezuela is the first to strike back: http://edition.cnn.com/2008/WORLD/americas/10/10/venezuela.mcdonalds/index.html
[re=129812]Sussemilch[/re]:
For the Horde!
http://www.wowarmory.com/character-sheet.xml?r=Feathermoon&n=Veranilla
[re=129925]Reefpilot[/re]: Awesome. Is it my imagination, or are Horde players liberal and the Alliance conservative? When I see something totally right-wing kool-aid posted on the wow forums 99% of the time it’s posted by a human paladin.
Good, now all these bastards can die of coronaries and diabetes and cancer after eating their fucking hearts out at Mickie D’s
[re=129948]Sussemilch[/re]: Me and my godless commie buddies are all Alliance so SUCK IT, you monsters!
[re=129948]Sussemilch[/re]: Offtopic forum ?
[re=129948]Sussemilch[/re]:
Or a nelf. Yeah. Definitely on feathermoon, you got the moonies and morons alliance, and they outnumber us 3, 4 to 1. If the “pretty up the horde” blood elves hadn’t come in, we’d be outnumbered by nelves alone. Speaking of which, when BC hit, we were overwhelmed with alliance bitterz rolling horde. Almost split the server due to a population rush until free transfers were offered, then back to normal.
All in all, divine intervention ftw. I dont like blood elves, but I like what paladins bring to the table.
We have our fair share of “conservatives,” horde-side. But at least their logic is working. They can frame an argument and kick your ass without resorting to spamming LIBRAL or SOCIALIZT or TERRST over and over. They haven’t said much lately… we have a fun sarah palin thread on the feathermoon forum and about ten to one, both horde and alliance, it’s been ganking her with some serious snark bizness.
We will not return to your regular scheduled wonketted snark program. But remember… Jim and commenters do play warcraft, and if it is brought up, it will be discussed.
Though no more winks. I was hoping a simple ; ) would be a palin winky reference in ascii, but instead I got the yellow icon. For that I am eternally sorry and will wear sack cloth until wrath comes out.
[re=129894]earling[/re]: MMMMmmmm, strawberry shake. They are neutral like Switzerland for Gods sake, not like the Coors people.
[re=129963]edgydrifter[/re]: Go find a mailbox to dance on.
Ugh – there goes my plan to cater my homosexual wedding with campy McDonalds apple pies – it’s back to fennel and brie for Troy and me.
Boy cot – what Congressman Mark Foley kept in his office for the visits from the male pages.
[re=129979]Reefpilot[/re]: I am really, really heartened that despite the giant nerdork I am and have been since ’89 I have nfi* what you’re drooling about.
And back on topic, what I’ve always hated about McD is that, to me, everything there tastes like their fries, and their fries taste like cardboard. Mind you, as an (8 year old) illegal, er, undocumented, immigrant my first meal in the USA was a Happy(tm) one. I guess if I’d been a little more precocious I would’ve had interpreted it as a metaphor and gotten a better idea where my parents were dragging me to (picture those hilarious signs along I-5 outside San Diego, with Juan, Maria and little Pedrito running across the highway). And I would’ve ran back.
*no fucking idea
[re=129761]Reefpilot[/re]: That was Lord of the Rings obviously.
A major corporation without a backbone? I’m shocked!
[re=130115]Kadeedy[/re]: That’s cause it’s been ground and used as filler in burger
[re=129738]mattbolt[/re]: THey understand the ECONOMICS of it all… Gay men and women have more disposable income.. just be cause they are GAY and not fucking BREEDERS like the rest of us….. …. Oh.. NOW I get why Craig and Foley are Repubs…and when you think about it, maybe more Republicans ARE gay…. they HATE paying taxes for schools and children’s health care….
Now if only the higher-ups at Chick-fil-A will stop pouring cash into Focus on the Family.
[re=130255]azw88[/re]: They aren’t Breeders, ergo they will not buy 28 ‘Happy Meals’ a week for their 2 little tubs of lard…
The continued inability of adults to grasp grammar rules that public school made sure I learned in 5th grade astounds. “It’s” vs. “its” is not that goddamn difficult.
McDonald’s sucks anyway–they keep trying to market their Chick-fil-a rip-off sandwich in Atlanta. Boo.
Rev. Wildmon of the AFA is always up-in-the-air about something or other (it keeps the bucks rolling in), sometimes over the most absurd things. A few years ago, AFA was upset that some guy got a grant to write a book protesting US Navy sailors getting drunk and laid in Thailand. Apparently Patthaya Beach has replaced Olongapo as the playground of the 7th Fleet, and he was urging the Navy Brass to stop it. I guess AFA didn’t like the implication that thousands of 19 year olds were buying all the perverted sex imaginable, and that offering them Bible studies wasn’t working.
Zhu Bajie
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