Wonkette
If there’s one thing the Clintons have absolutely zero compunctions about, it’s raising money to fund their Presidential porn collections, nefarious parking-lot murder plots, and cynical seduction of “hard-working white Americans.” So it’s kind of amazing that Hillary Clinton isn’t just sending out her own goddamn fundraising letters and leaving our precious Barry and Joe out of her shameful shillery, but there you have it: Vice President-elect Joe Biden is issuing a fundraising appeal for the Secretary of State-to-be, who needs dollars to pay off the “hard-working individuals and small businesses” (read: Mark Penn and the Bilderberg Group) who helped her tour Florida and Michigan shouting about DISENFRANCHISEMENT long after she’d lost any realistic hope of winning the Democratic nomination.
Here is Joe Biden’s stupid email:
From: Joe Biden
Subject: Our commitment to a friendPresident-elect Obama and I have been assembling our team, and we plan to hit the ground running next month.
We want to be ready to go, and that’s why I’m asking you to help us honor an outstanding commitment we made during the election.
Our campaign pledged to help Senator Hillary Clinton — one of the vital members of our team and our future Secretary of State — retire her campaign debt. That’s the money her campaign owes to the vendors across the country that make our political process possible.
Barack and I had the deepest respect for Hillary as an opponent on the campaign trail. Her undeniable intellect, talent, and passion strengthened Barack as a candidate and tested our movement for change.
We welcome Hillary as a partner in our administration, and I hope you will show your support by helping Barack fulfill our campaign promise.
Will you make a contribution of $100 or more now to retire Hillary’s campaign debt?
I saw your generosity and commitment to this team throughout the election, and I know we can do it.
In the general election, Hillary was one of our strongest advocates. She traveled the country and did more than 70 events, raising money and bringing new supporters into our campaign.
As Secretary of State, she will be indispensable in furthering Barack’s agenda for change.
Let’s welcome Hillary to the team and thank her for her efforts in support of our campaign by helping to retire her debt to the hard-working individuals and small businesses that were a part of the election:
https://donate.barackobama.com/hillary
Your support and generosity got us this far, and I know I can count on it now.
Thank you,
Joe
Jesus. Why doesn’t she get the old money-printing troll to just add a couple million to the press? Hillary Clinton’s campaign debt will be nothing compared to the debt we’ll be carrying to finance her next pet project (war with Syria/Iran/Canada, plus a Lear jet full of giant blonde whores for her husband).
“Will you make a contribution of $100 or more now to retire Hillary’s campaign debt?”
nope
Sheesh, just give her a bailout of her own. Problem solved! It worked for the financial industry, right?
Well I hope she spent three damn days, driving to Washington in a hybrid horseless, for absolutely no reason! Cause that’s what she’d do if she were really interested in getting the big buxxx.
Why donn’t the fucking PUMAs retire her debt?
I’m proud to introduce “The Inverse PUMA” to the jargon.
Joe, say it ain’t so, also.
Also: Can we just start rounding up the jobless/homeless/hobos and start feeding them to Mark Penn? I bet that would placate him for a while. Two birds, one fat, slobbry stone. Who’s with me people?
And FWIW, “A Lear Jet Full Of Giant Blonde Whores” sounds like the title of a Tom Waits song.
But Paul Wolfowitz said her campaign would pay for itself.
You (and your giant Clintonian ego) ran up the bill, now pay it!
Right about now Biden has to be thinking, “this VP thing is gonna suck so hard…” Grab your ankles, Joe.
I see Hillary needs a new plan:
1. Get job with Goldman Sachs.
2. ?????
3. Profit!
Wait a minute…NPR says Obama’s got $30M still in the bank from the campaign. Shouldn’t he cough up the dough?
SKS, you put the alt text monkey on our collective back, don’t cut us off cold turkey.
So than that’s also part of the deal. She becomes SoS provided Ball comes clean about donors to his foundation and that Barack and Joe raise funds to make up her campaign deficit. Any other conditions precedent or clauses in the agreement that we should know about?
I can’t even really snark about this. Hillary and Bill are worth about 8x what her campaign owes. Much of what they have earned was because he was President (speaking fees, book contract, etc.), and both of them are still earning big bucks–he as head of his foundation, and she as SecState. Neither of them has to worry about finances for the rest of their days. There’s not a chance in hell I’m going to pay a cent to them when they could simply cut a check and retire the debt completely.
SayItWithWookies: As the U.S. is now a Third World kleptocracy, all she needed to do was get into the government to recoup the funds through rent-seeking and asset stripping. And she did it, without even winning! Therefore, these fund raising letters are highly unnecessary…
Well, since you asked politely … no.
StephanieInCA: I am guessing the Big 3 had the corporate jets fly in (passengerless) and are powered up on the runway for the escape with the $$$.
Meanwhile, in AK. Gov. Palin is still doing an inventory of the clothes she needs to return….
SayItWithWookies: She also thought the superdelegates would greet her as a liberator.
Joe begging for teh munnies 4 uber-rich Clinton’s “Obama sux” campaign gives me the sad.
More cheetos. More pr0n.
Can I haz weekend now?
$100 OR MORE? Do these fucking people think money fucking grows on trees? PREY TO YOUR GORILLA HILLARY. DO NOT ASK ME FOR MONEY.
Alt text:
“Ow! What is that, a carrot? OK, sign my name to the thing.”
Oh fuck all these self-obsessed plutocrats. Um, so the answer is no.
Dave J.: I’m with you. I don’t know if Joe or Bill or Hill have read the newspapers or turned on their HDTVs lately, but we got no money to spare, esp. to give to multi-millionaires. Their gall is epic. Barry is starting to piss me off with all these ‘asking for more money’ emails.
Hillary will be a Playboy centerfold before she gets a dollar from me.
Fuck - FDL has their Peggy Noonan up before ours (But no Blingee, so I wont read it)
I got the note. I figure Bill and Hillary have 100 times what I have. Not a penny.
Oh for fucks sake. I actually like Hillary. Honestly. But she ran her campaign into the ground and kept going when there was literally no chance she could win. So instead of begging me for money how about you pay it yourself you cheap egomaniac? Mkay?
Also, the upcoming war with Canada: Alberta first please. Steve has it coming.
V572625694: No, Barack can’t just give her the munnies. People donated to, you know, his campaign. So I think it would be illegal to re-appropriate those donations to another campaign.
Dave J.: The funny thing is, a lot of the “debt” is the “loans” that the Clinton’s made to her campaign. They’re trying to get us to re-pay Hillary the millions of dollars that she donated to her own pathetic vanity project.
I think that Obama/Biden should get Rush Limbaugh to join the cabinet -
They can pay him his current salary just to shut up.
Perhaps Putin and Kim Jong-Il could be bought off as well … all paid for by donations to change.gov …
I will be happy to donate $100 so long as I am provided with oral sex.
It can be from anybody. I’m really not that particular.
Unlike a lot of you, I don’t even hate Hillary, but I wonder if Joe the Biden is experiencing the same bad taste in his mouth as I am in mine.
Lascauxcaveman: Sounds like you got your wish Mr Blifil: ??
Mr Blifil: What about the Brown Bush?
Oh, go on and give the nice lady some money. It will help our economy here in Iowa, where I’m sure her DC-imported drones left stacks of unpaid bills.
I know its been said quite a lot that as Sec of State Hillary can no longer raise funds to retire the debt, which on the surface is true, but according to the US Office of Special Counsel in an advisory on the Hatch Act, there is nothing to stop either her Campaign Committee or Chair or any other [non-government employed] supporter from soliciting funds to retire any campaign debts…in fact, Hillary can even attend fundraising events designed to retire that debt after she is a government employee as long as she doesn’t make a direct personal plea….
As far as I can tell, she is under no pressure to retire the debt before becoming Sec of State…thus i feel sure we will continue to receive these utterly lame/shameless requests for some time to come…
Hillz, put on your big girl panties and suck it up…..
Looks like a phishing attempt to me.
Hey, she’s got a job…. and if her creditors are breathing down her neck, SEND HER OUT OF THE COUNTRY MORE OFTEN… it’ll make her hard to find and has other advantages as well….she can take her husband…problem solved…Oh, I should dig deep to help her…? …well. let’s see what I’ve got… no, that’s not it….oh, hand me those cheetos….
Dave J.: I don’t think you appreciate just how much hookers and blow Bill buys.
On the fifth day of Christmas my true love gave to me:
Five diamond whores
Four calling girls
Three French tarts
Two Herpes pimples
And a Lear Jet full of Giant Blonde Whores
Wait, so from the email it sounds like “vendors across the country” are still waiting to get paid? Seriously? If Hilz has stiffed the printers and caterers and whoever else (small businesses, mostly) that she used after her campaign was clearly doomed, then she is a much more amoral bitch than I gave her credit for.
If she’s actually paid them all and is just trying to pay herself back, that’s another thing.
Still not gettin’ any munnies from me, tho. Bill can give a couple more speeches and they can both suck it.
FreshCliches: My all-time fav line in a Tom Waits song is as follows: “I’m getting harder than Chinese algebra”
Seems appropriate, no?
I’m sure the PUMAs would pay for this if they knew about it. But I bet they all put Biden in the Kill File.
Bill and Hillary and their
shameful shillery.
I guess they have to ask, but do Barry and Joe really think anyone who supported them is going to help the Clintons repay themselves for their campaign loans? No, I don’t think so.
Meanwhile, back out in the hinterlands, in the Dew Drop Inn, Kentucky and WV, the citizens gather nightly and await their own private Godot. For did she not claim she was one of them, vowing to banish that Bar-Black back to the cotton fields back home?
“You seen ‘er yit?”
“Nope, ain’t show hide ner hair.”
They slosh dark draft, watch the door. It’s a Cargo Cult.
Maybe if Hills agreed to work for $1.00 a year.
snort! snort!
Wouldn’t pay off her debt, but who cares?
CivicHoliday: Mine is “Who were the ones that we kept in charge? Killers! Thieves! And LAWYERS!”