• February 11, 2012
  • President Obama is expected to sign executive orders decreeing free foot massages and cookies for Guantanamo detainees, just like his opponents always warned us. [UPI]
  • People who work in the downtown, Mall and Capitol Hill areas will be treated to rolling street closures and anti-abortion protests today. [Washington Post]
  • Hillary Clinton was very predictably approved as secretary of state, but you already knew that. [Los Angeles Times]
  • Ha ha suck it LBJ: Obama’s inauguration drew a crowd of 1.8 million, which is 600,000 more than Johnson’s record-setting 1965 inauguration. [Washington Post]
  • Violence continues in Sri Lanka, where the military took over a Tamil Tiger command hub in the north. [BBC]
  • The parties most closely associated with China’s melamine-tainted milk scandal were sentenced to death (the men) and to life in prison (the women). [Reuters]

{ 47 comments }

AngryBlakGuy January 22, 2009 at 9:05 am

WIN! on the “Decemberist” title!

ManchuCandidate January 22, 2009 at 9:05 am

Why not just make those responsible for the melamine mess drink milk? Saves on bullets so they can use the lead for toys.

queeraselvis v 2.0 January 22, 2009 at 9:06 am

Ha ha suck it LBJ: Obama’s inauguration drew a crowd of 1.8 million, which is 600,000 more than Johnson’s record-setting 1965 inauguration.

According to the Nielsen family, Obama drew the second largest TV audience, after Ronald “Yippee Ki Yi Yeah Motherfucker” Reagan. Of course they didn’t take into account all of us who saw it on the Intertubez.

Tommy Says Ira G is a Tool January 22, 2009 at 9:10 am

Here’s a Wonkette project for Secretary Cankles….when she takes her first trip outta town, get a cab and cruise by her D.C. digs and see if Ron Burkle shows up in the Hummer limo.

Serolf Divad January 22, 2009 at 9:13 am

China’s got the whole bread and circus thing down to a science. Whenever a big corruption scandal breaks they line up a few players against a wall and put a bullet in the back of their heads. Bye, bye, the end. No need for long investigations, no need for deep seated structural reforms, no need for implementing robust oversight agencies, no need for adequately compensating victims. A 10 cent bullet is a lot cheaper than all that and gets enough people to shut up about the whole thing that everyone can just move on with their business secure in the comforting notion that a few more corpses have been added to the Chinese legal system’s ultra-efficient killing fields. It’s no wonder the Chinese news agency was one of the few to express appreciation for G.W. Bush’s time in office and skepticism of Obama’s commitment to strong U.S./China relations. The Chinese autocracy and the Bush/Cheney plutocracy are, ultimately, cut from the same cloth.

Darehead January 22, 2009 at 9:15 am

1.8 million, but where was Dan Quayle?

shanemacgowan January 22, 2009 at 9:21 am

OT, but the commentators on Fox and Friends said this morning that the second swearing-in doesn’t count either because Barry did not use a Bible.

freakishlystrong January 22, 2009 at 9:22 am

Not to go OT, but did anyone see Russell Tice on Olbermann last night? Bunny haz a scared…Makes one wonder if they got all of us as well, and if they did, Suck it assholes!

Terry January 22, 2009 at 9:23 am

I don’t think LBJ would mind that Obama beat his record. Now, if Bush has done it, that would have pissed the old boy off, I’m sure.

Darehead January 22, 2009 at 9:24 am

Sara must have gotten up late, found herself one story short, consulted the Ouija and landed on “T.”

T, as in Tiger. Tony the Tiger? NOOOOOOOO. Tamil the Tiger. Which has what to do with Obama? I don’t know. But it’s a peaceful little island country with nice beaches and mellow people like Hawaii, and yet there is racial violence there on a scale you’d never expect. The end.

freakishlystrong January 22, 2009 at 9:26 am

[re=225472]shanemacgowan[/re]: Did you happen see Hannity and Limpball’s hate salad? I could only watch about two minutes. Yay Post bi-partisanship!

queeraselvis v 2.0 January 22, 2009 at 9:27 am

[re=225472]shanemacgowan[/re]: As I told TGY on a previous thread, here’s the text of Barry’s first Executive Order:

Dear Chris Matthews and the Faux Nooz Krewe:

You are still a bunch of doughy pantloads. Eat a bag of dicks.

Sincerely.

PRESIDENT Barack Hussein Obama

P.S. Feel free to kiss my black ass. No, really.

shanemacgowan January 22, 2009 at 9:29 am

[re=225476]freakishlystrong[/re]: I can take a few minutes of F&F in the morning to leer at the newsbunnies. The tart factor has gone up exponentially since Barry’s election. I think they sense something.

Terry January 22, 2009 at 9:30 am

http://www.thedailybeast.com/blogs-and-stories/2009-01-21/what-bush-did-right/

She needs to borrow a few meds from Laura. Karen Hughes is obviously delusional.

shanemacgowan January 22, 2009 at 9:31 am

[re=225477]queeraselvis v 2.0[/re]: Personally, I’d choose the firing squad over eating a bag of dicks. The morning guys on Fox would probably choose differently

ManchuCandidate January 22, 2009 at 9:32 am

[re=225473]freakishlystrong[/re]:
Of course they did. Blackmailing journos and news organizations has a long and storied past. Of course much easier if you think you are secure and shit using stuff like encrypted phones and email while unaware that 99% of the crypto algorithms comes from the same NSA that is monitoring you and “licensed” to electronic/SW makers.

Oh good morning, NSA. How are you?

[re=225475]Darehead[/re]:
Good times. Good times.

WadISay January 22, 2009 at 9:34 am

[re=225473]freakishlystrong[/re]: My reaction was, it ought to be clearly prosecutable, and that Mr. Tice should get a remote starter for his car.

Servo January 22, 2009 at 9:36 am

[re=225475]Darehead[/re]:
I imagine the military perpetually chasing them in one large circle around the island, like the Keystone Kops.

freakishlystrong January 22, 2009 at 9:37 am

[re=225482]ManchuCandidate[/re]: I think why I’m baffled is that I perused AM “news”, all of them, to see if this made ink, anywhere, to my shock and awe, it did not.
And it should’ve.

pondscum January 22, 2009 at 9:37 am

[re=225480]Terry[/re]: What about the dog? She doesn’t tell us what happened to the dog!!!

Terry January 22, 2009 at 9:43 am

[re=225487]pondscum[/re]:

She gave it to Mittens, obviously, as a gift as he has a way with animals.

Servo January 22, 2009 at 9:44 am

[re=225468]Serolf Divad[/re]:
Actually, China’s Defense Minister, Colonel Hu Changming, has stated his hope that the Obama administration considers military cooperation ( joint exercises ) between the two nations. It will be interesting to see how that plays out. Chinese-marked Su-27s at an airbase near you? Stay tuned.

MoonshineJoe January 22, 2009 at 9:45 am

I was sort of hoping that this new post was actually about the Decemberists (the band, not the revolutionaries). Imagine my disappointment when I discovered it was just about how Obama’s inauguration could beat up LBJ’s, I mean who didn’t know that?

ManchuCandidate January 22, 2009 at 9:45 am

[re=225486]freakishlystrong[/re]:
Same reason why they don’t talk about Military Analyst Club

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/harry-shearer/the-military-analyst-scan_b_100930.html

The wimpy media higher ups have a self image to uphold and the thought of them being beaten by the craven dopes of the Bush Admin is too much for them to admit to. Better to think of oneself as Upton Sinclair than the ShamWow guy.

freakishlystrong January 22, 2009 at 9:46 am

[re=225480]Terry[/re]: I hope she can fly Golden Retrievers in to Paraguay…

Larry McAwful January 22, 2009 at 9:48 am

China proves how civilized its government is by executing men but not women. Of course, considering China’s dire woman shortage right now, that’s not terribly surprising, I guess.

Contrast this with the government of the state of Georgia, which was the first in the United States to hang a woman to death. Yeehaw!

ManchuCandidate January 22, 2009 at 9:49 am

[re=225480]Terry[/re]:
Damn, I thought the article would be, I don’t know, a couple of words at most.

AfghanVet January 22, 2009 at 9:51 am

[re=225464]ManchuCandidate[/re]: China makes the family pay for the bullet for those they execute. Nice touch if you ask me.

AfghanVet January 22, 2009 at 9:54 am

As I crossed the street to go to work today I waved at President O as he drove by and I had to laugh as I thought about all of those people who endured cold, long lines and taffic to get a glimpse.

Mr Blifil January 22, 2009 at 9:59 am

[re=225473]freakishlystrong[/re]: Yeah, I was also shocked to find out that the government keeps a record of which license plate is registered to the car my wife and I drive. I’M UNDER THE THUMB OF THE GODDAMN MAN!!

When I discovered this I had a strong urge to pack my family in the car and drive it off the Verrazanno bridge, hopping out at the last instant to save myself. I had to defer action however when a flaw in my getaway plan became apparent, as I realized I’d have to hitch a ride back off the bridge. I’m now working out a new scheme involving a parachute/hang glider and a set of really strong wrist guards like the in-line skaters use.

Mr Blifil January 22, 2009 at 10:00 am

[re=225507]AfghanVet[/re]: When they come for you, do not run.

Serolf Divad January 22, 2009 at 10:19 am

[re=225495]Servo[/re]:

Did he reach out to Obama with his black gloved hand and express the desire that they rule the galaxy together as father and son?

Herunar January 22, 2009 at 10:28 am

[re=225468]Serolf Divad[/re]:
You talk from your rear end?

freakishlystrong January 22, 2009 at 10:28 am

[re=225514]Mr Blifil[/re]: Hmmm..whaddya think Onstar is for?

actor212 January 22, 2009 at 10:40 am

[re=225504]AfghanVet[/re]: I’m surprised Bush didn’t adopt this in Texas, Vet.

Servo January 22, 2009 at 10:42 am

[re=225527]Serolf Divad[/re]:
Buffet Diplomacy with General Tso.

Min January 22, 2009 at 10:52 am

I’m trying to find the snark in the Sri Lankan situation, but alas. I fail.

OTOH, LBJ is probably lying in his grave, doing a Texas two-step and chortling like a madman. Because that’s the kinda guy he was.

JamesMichaelCurley January 22, 2009 at 11:19 am

[re=225465]queeraselvis v 2.0[/re]: And Reagan’s 1985 inauguration was on a Sunday in the midst of a three day week end. Obama’s was on a Tuesday, the day after a three day week end.

queeraselvis v 2.0 January 22, 2009 at 11:26 am

[re=225567]JamesMichaelCurley[/re]: Thus birthing the Republican ideology that Reagan was more popular than God.

Paul Tardy January 22, 2009 at 11:33 am

So why was he inaugurated in Kenya? Surpirsed even the wingnuts didn’t catch that. He’s not my president until he is inaugurated right here in the USA.

“I’m trying to find the snark in the Sri Lankan situation, but alas. I fail.” Just remember Pres. Obama defeated terrorism (in Sri Lanka) on the first day on the job (although I suppose the Bushies will claim the Shri Lankan triumf for their own). Next week, Fiji, hurrah hurrahh.

hobospacejungle January 22, 2009 at 11:58 am

[re=225486]freakishlystrong[/re]: “I think why I’m baffled is that I perused AM “news”, all of them, to see if this made ink, anywhere, to my shock and awe, it did not.”

I said to my wife as we watched last night, “this will be ignored by everyone else.” No one has any interest in this story getting play. Not the Congress who voted for immunity for the telcos and certainly not the media who are still extricating their craniums from Bush’s colon/rectum/anus. Unless something specific comes out, like “we tapped Katie Couric’s phone sex” or something, consider it not news.

I hope I am wrong but our greatest hope is probably other signatories to the CAT starting investigations into US America torture and embarrassing the fuck out of Hopey for not doing anything.

p-Sludge January 22, 2009 at 11:59 am

can’t decide.
* obama=spock
* obama=batman
* obama=adama

actor212 January 22, 2009 at 12:36 pm

[re=225600]p-Sludge[/re]: How about Spamadama?

intellijen January 22, 2009 at 12:44 pm

of the boisterous anti-abortion teens:

Most of the young people had participated in a massive sleepover last night at the National Shrine of the Immaculate Conception

which should really read “National Shrine of Teen Pregnancy Out of Wedlock”.

stick that one in your song, ms. morissette.

mylesfromnowhere January 22, 2009 at 1:02 pm

Hopey’s new memamine laced kool-aid (for repubs/paultards/pumas only)…gets that awful taste of sour grapes right out of your mouth! or just for pumas, the taste of snack cakes.

Portugal (The Man) January 22, 2009 at 1:12 pm

Servo:

What number combination platter is that? I might get it when I order take-out (or take-away, damn Limeys).

NebraskashireGentry January 23, 2009 at 10:53 am

when I was in Little League, we used to play the Tigers.

most of them wanted to play professional baseball when they grew up. I’m sad to see that this is what became of their childhood dreams.

Comments on this entry are closed.

Previous post:

Next post: