• February 15, 2012

Wonkette male makeup expert “Ratty” points out that Senator Kerry appeared on Meet the Press this weekend looking like he’d swung by the M.A.C. counter on the way to the studio. This is not the first time we have seen such horrible makeup errors on MTP in general, and John Kerry in particular. Do none of these people consult a mirror before they go onstage in their clown faces? [MSNBC]

{ 45 comments }

shanemacgowan February 2, 2009 at 10:46 am

Most of what you attribute to “horrible makeup errors” is really Mitch McConnell.

TGY February 2, 2009 at 10:46 am

Poor Treebeard. Only cartoonists get to draw faces like that. Then again, it wouldn’t be the first time he went off half cocked.

rmontcal February 2, 2009 at 10:52 am

What’s the problem?

norbizness February 2, 2009 at 10:52 am

HE’S JOHN KERRY AND HE’S REPORTING FOR SHIT DUTY.

P.S. Anyone remember the “who’s that Muppet made out of leather?” gag on The Simpsons?

ManchuCandidate February 2, 2009 at 10:52 am

Uncle Leo?

sarcasticusername February 2, 2009 at 10:54 am

i remember this one time when the MTP folks gave barry the most atrocious makeup job i’ve ever seen on him; they managed to make mr. sexy look truly frightening. seriously, these guys would be better off having a drunk tranny do their faces than letting the MTP folks within 10 feet of them with a makeup brush.

Monsieur Grumpe February 2, 2009 at 10:54 am
Serolf Divad February 2, 2009 at 10:55 am

Goddamns liberals! When will they finally come to realize that the only way we’re going to get out of this mess is by eliminating Taxes on all income above $500,000.00 and then taking everyone who makes less than $50,000.00 a year and turning them into indentured servants for the top 5% of income earners.

hobospacejungle February 2, 2009 at 10:57 am

I’m surprised The Human Sleeping Pill didn’t put everyone to sleep on MTP. Then he could’ve had the rest of the show to himself to promote his plan to save the economy: free ketchup for everyone. Or was it free buttsecks. Can’t remember, I fell asleep.

4tehlulz February 2, 2009 at 10:59 am

[re=233927]hobospacejungle[/re]: It was free ketchup, but only on the condition that it be used as anal lube.

loudmouthredhead February 2, 2009 at 11:04 am

Hey, I thought Steve Forbes looked almost human for once, so the makeup crew can’t be all bad at MTP.

“Personally, Ah lahk Tom Dashcle…but it does trouble me. It gives me the vaypahs!”

loudmouthredhead February 2, 2009 at 11:07 am

Democrats just don’t realize that you need to spend AT LEAST $50,000 outfitting your party members before letting them anywhere near a public forum…but be sure to say you’ll give their clothes to charity when you’re done.

Classy-looking hobos? THAT’S change I can believe in.

Naked Bunny with a Whip February 2, 2009 at 11:08 am

Would you look in a mirror if you knew that Senator John F. Kerry would be looking back at you? Would you?!

Anita Cocktail February 2, 2009 at 11:10 am

As Kathy Griffin would say, “Looks like someone pissed off the wrong queen.”

loudmouthredhead February 2, 2009 at 11:21 am

[re=233932]Naked Bunny with a Whip[/re]: How YOU doin’ there, handsome? *wink*
Time to make the ketchup…

WadISay February 2, 2009 at 11:21 am

He’s probably got a “kick me” sign on his back, too.

Mr Blifil February 2, 2009 at 11:23 am

Truly, Karloff was one of our greatest Senators.

Mr Blifil February 2, 2009 at 11:24 am

[re=233924]Serolf Divad[/re]: Originally I read that as advocating eliminating Texas. A course of action of which I would approve entirely.

Serolf Divad February 2, 2009 at 11:25 am

[re=233932]Naked Bunny with a Whip[/re]:

A funhouse mirror?

Lascauxcaveman February 2, 2009 at 11:35 am

It … it’s almost lifelike.

thongthongthong February 2, 2009 at 11:37 am

This brow flips. That one flops.
Meh. They painted his wrinkles in OK.

ChicagoTypewriter February 2, 2009 at 11:39 am

“Senator Kerry…is this enough stimulus?”

cal February 2, 2009 at 11:41 am

He likes to think of himself as Sam the Eagle, but he’s really more Snuffleupagus.

actor212 February 2, 2009 at 11:45 am

Clearly, the NBC Fifth Column does nto extend to the make-up department, which had no problem making Kay Bailey Hutchinson look like a not-fag-hag.

psilage February 2, 2009 at 11:47 am

Reason he doesn’t have any eyebrows of his own?
Got ‘em shot off in ‘Nam.
Now he’s an Alpaca.

thongthongthong February 2, 2009 at 11:49 am
HMS Nerd February 2, 2009 at 11:51 am

@actor212 – yeah, I often wondered how Republicans managed to get decent makeup before appearances on LIBERAL msm shows…then I remembered that they were republicans

bitchincamaro February 2, 2009 at 11:51 am

File this under: Lipstick on a horseface.

thongthongthong February 2, 2009 at 11:52 am
FreshCliches February 2, 2009 at 11:53 am

Meh. The collar’s high enough to hide the neck bolts.

Serolf Divad February 2, 2009 at 11:54 am

[re=233945]Lascauxcaveman[/re]:

Fun John Kerry Factoid: Had he been elected president in 2004, his statue in Madame Tussaud’s would have been the only wax figure more lifelike than its actual subject.

thefrontpage February 2, 2009 at 11:54 am

Actually, most of the time, when people appear on these goofball television political shows, members of the staff of the show handle make-up and hair. It’s very rare, in fact, for any television show guest to handle their own make-up. This is because the show’s staff members know what make-up and hair spray will work with the particular lights and cameras used on that show. And even if some diva did demand to do their own make-up, it would have to be approved by the show’s producer and director. So don’t blame Kerry on this–it’s likely just some make-up person who had a slight off-day on the show.

orbit222 February 2, 2009 at 11:54 am

Ok, So every time I hear John Kerry’s Voice I drop on the ground like I have a severe case of narkosleepy. Sometime it takes folks a minute to figure out what’s happened, but once they do it’s all ways good for a laugh. I encourage all to follow suit. If we can get everybody to fein unconsciousness every time this boor blabs, perchance we can get the blabbing to stop. Oh god it needs to stop.

Tommmcatt February 2, 2009 at 12:01 pm

[re=233964]thefrontpage[/re]:

My policy is to blame Kerry for everything that happened over the last four years, and he doesn’t get a pass on this either, godammit.

actor212 February 2, 2009 at 12:20 pm

[re=233963]Serolf Divad[/re]: Hey, at least he’d have a job after 1/20/09: giving lunch breaks to his own wax statue.

Sussemilch February 2, 2009 at 12:20 pm

Boring-o-tron shorted out… Kerry talking about ‘stimulus’ is like Bush talking about ‘literacy’.

thongthongthong February 2, 2009 at 12:24 pm

Swift browed.

madtowngooner February 2, 2009 at 12:53 pm

Wasn’t there a Dylan song, “Sad Eyed Muppett of the Lowlands”? Also.

shortsshortsshorts February 2, 2009 at 12:59 pm

John Kerry is proof that even turds have more civil rights then gays.

lawrenceofthedesert February 2, 2009 at 1:04 pm

“Meet the Press” would be so more interesting if Guy Smiley were the host.

chascates February 2, 2009 at 1:38 pm

Whoever did up Erin Burnett got it right.

donner_froh February 2, 2009 at 1:47 pm

I thought he was going to be on “Press the Meat”, then got stuck with this blah-blah-blah on Sunday morning.

sezme February 2, 2009 at 2:43 pm

Seriously, that wasn’t really Kerry was it? Wasn’t that just some guy in a rubber Kerry mask?

Uncle Glenny February 2, 2009 at 4:31 pm

Is it just me, since I don’t watch the TV, or is he – successfully – overcoming a case of Blago-hair-envy?

Joehoya February 2, 2009 at 6:21 pm

I think his eyebrows give him a quizzical, Mr. Spock-type look. It’s very becoming.

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