Warren Buffett Now Applying For Subprime Credit Cards
by Sara K. Smith
- So ha ha, funny story: this English anti-terror muckety muck accidentally allowed himself to be photographed getting out of a car while holding a top-secret file, and so British police had to carry out a bunch of raids earlier than they’d planned due to old doofus revealing their plans to the press. [BBC News]
- Nearly a dozen states are mulling a major increase in sales or income taxes due to the “no money anywhere” problem. [Wall Street Journal]
- Virginia’s (Democratic) governor wants federal stimulus money, but its (Republican) House does not. [Fox News]
- Moody’s, the credit rating service that two years ago would have assigned a triple-A rating to a crack addict with 35 cents and a half-eaten tube of Chapstick in their pocket, has now downgraded Berkshire Hathaway’s formerly sterling credit rating. [New York Times]
- The American crew of a hijacked ship off the coast of Africa regained control of the vessel, but Somali pirates took the captain hostage and haven’t given him up, yet. [BBC News]
- A mythical substance known as “brown fat” might be able to keep you from becoming obese, if you don’t mind hanging out in a 61-degree room for the rest of your life. [Washington Post]
Kirsten Boyd Johnson (800)
Jim Newell (5429)
Wonkette Jr. (626)
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Blair Burke (171)
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Arielle Fleisher (385)
{ 21 comments }
Tell Warren that success has its enemies.
The alt text on the photograph accompanying the top-secret-doofus article made tea go up my nose.
[re=284823]AxmxZ[/re]: “Ass Bob Com Quick”, WTF? Teabags also.
So, if I cobble together $89,000 I will be able to buy one share of Berkshire Hathaway. Buy low, sell high. Warren would be so proud.
When you negotiate with a pirate, are you required to say ‘aaargh!!’ a lot?
Today that same crack addict would reject stimulus funds due to the taint of creeping socialism.
Not cool, Bob Quick. I moved my mouse over the pic of him with the docs and found the BBC had thoughtfully set the alt-text to ‘Ass Com Bob Quick’. For a moment, I thought I was back at Wonkette.
[re=284825]freakishlystrong[/re]: Doh! I’m late as usual.
I’ve kept my house around 62 °F (approx. 16.7 °C for you pinko Yer-A-Peein’ types) to save on heating and conserve energy, not to activate ‘brown fat’.
“Bob Quick” allowed himself to be photographed getting out of a car and revealed something he shouldn’t have? Will he now shave his head and have his children repo’ed?
Was the brown fat study published in the “Duh journal of medical science”? 1. People burn more calories in the cold to stay warm. 2. Skinny people burn more calories than fat people. Shocking!
Sales tax won’t help, because nobody’s buying anything. And income tax won’t work because everyone is unemployed. Ciggy tax is the only thing that will work, because everyone I work with would still smoke if it cost $2 a puff. Oh wait, we already tried that. Hrm.
[re=284836]Norbert[/re]: Not before screaming “I am the ANTICHRIST”
This seems like a win/win for the hijackers & the ship owners.
I’ve never seen a bond stooge stick his neck out like that.
[re=284849]Bruno[/re]: Well, it would be, but a Navy destroyer is on their way. Which doesn’t look good for the pirates, barring them having like a zillion torpedo tubes on their dinghy, or junk, or whatever penile euphemism they use to describe tiny boats in Somalia.
You should hear the wailing and gnashing of gums since we raised the cigarette tax a few weeks ago here in Arkansas.
Don’t tax me pr0n.
[re=284856]ChernobylSoup[/re]: One of my friends was complaining how his “constitutional rights are being infringed” because the federal cigarette tax was raised 220% “without any representation”. I’m like, it was passed by the House of Representatives. It sucks when you’re in the minority and nobody cares what you think, but you can always just vote with your dollars and stop buying cigarettes, which would at least get the tobacco lobby on your side, right? Oh, my bad, you CAN’T stop buying them! Because you’re addicted, ha ha! So you voluntarily agreed to do whatever anyone demands of you to get something, and have zero leverage on the matter? Sorry but I think that’s what’s called being someone’s bitch.
It’s CNN pirate thurday. What’s the weather like for the pirates? What sports do the pirates like? Are pirates a threat to me? Vice President Hillary laughs at poor black pirates.
Bears and chipmunks have known about this brown fat thing for, like, EVER.
Godam those medikal dokders are stoopid.
Hey Mr. British Anti Terror guy, it’s called a ‘briefcase’ or maybe ‘valise.’ You can get a nice one for £40 at Harrods. Look into it.
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