• February 14, 2012

Tea bear.Here’s a fun new “open thread” thing we will do, which will simultaneously tackle the Problem of coming up with an “open thread” deal and the other Problem of how your Wonkette editors need to whore their free-lance stuff, so that you will read it, and then Wonkette’s free-lance editors will be all, “THX 4 DA PAGEVIEWZ” and your editors will be all, “No, thank you, for the paychecks,” and then everybody will have sex, with a trash robot.

It is called “Wonkette Writers Around Town.” So classy! Go ahead and have fun/interesting conversations in the comments — by which, we mean, you don’t really need to make a lot of comments along the lines of “Wow somebody PAYS you to write this crap,” &c. Instead, you could just skip this post, as a rule. Easy!

  • Why can’t you legally use the Secret Legal Loophole and not pay your taxes, like the crazy people? [NBC Washington]
  • Poll of the Now: Should citizens pay income tax today, or mail a small baglet of tea to the government? Who will win?! [AOL Hot Seat]
  • Remember that one guy? Christian, likes poor people, used to be fat? Yeah well he will not become president in 2012, either. [NBC New York]
  • What the Teabaggers have really taught us is the crucial role tea has played in developing global trade. [True/Slant]
  • One way you can tell Obama is gay/socialist/foreign is his “virtue” of patience. [NBC New York]
  • Uh oh, here’s some more scintillating journalism video of today’s tea-less teabagging tea party in DC. [NBC Washington]

{ 46 comments }

Min April 15, 2009 at 7:34 pm

BEARS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

StephanieInCA April 15, 2009 at 7:35 pm

I do not know what that post meant, at all, but VISIT TEABLOGGING.NET WE HAVE POSTED LIKE A BILLION GREAT THINGS TODAY. And Shorts will have sex with you, if you want: http://teablogging.net

problemwithcaring April 15, 2009 at 7:37 pm

More whorin’! Wait, AOL what?

ManchuCandidate April 15, 2009 at 7:38 pm

Rick Perry wants Tejas wants to succeed from US America. I’d like to see how US America deals with a cattle roping/Lonestar drinking version of Somalia on it’s borders.

smashtheduck April 15, 2009 at 7:41 pm

How the fuck is a DC cop making over 100K?!?!?!!!11!

smashtheduck April 15, 2009 at 7:44 pm

Shocking that more people showed up for the pillow fight than the tea bagging.

InsidiousTuna April 15, 2009 at 7:46 pm

Fucking A. I just got back from the Waco thing. Absolutely miserable. Pics are on Shorts’ site, and I’m writing something up right now.

facehead April 15, 2009 at 7:48 pm

That photo captures the essence of me losing my virginity.

V572625694 April 15, 2009 at 7:48 pm

[re=291001]StephanieInCA[/re]: No offense, but w/r/t sex/w Shorts_x_3 do not want. Unless she is really a hot 22-year-old woman, which somehow seems improbable.

Scandalabra April 15, 2009 at 7:48 pm

I wanted to write a lovely little note to Elizabeth Askew, and thank her for all those servicey local pieces, (and even ask her out for a date at that chicken and Jack Daniel thing)…but then it turns out you have to create a whole new avatar/identity to comment on Wonkabout, and frankly, after a vodka/tonic, I don’t have the strength. Yaah! Elizabeth!

american mutt April 15, 2009 at 7:49 pm

These posts are more DADA by the day.

obfuscator April 15, 2009 at 7:50 pm

This is another shot from the Springfield bagfest.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/aka_kath/3445115749/

grevillea April 15, 2009 at 7:51 pm

Wake up, sheeple! Who do you think is making bank off your teabagging? The world’s biggest exporter of black tea is… Kenya! I know! Join the dots: Tea-British Empire=Bretton Woods=End of the Gold Standard-Kenya-Maumaus-Mao-Communism-Obama-Tax slavery!!!

facehead April 15, 2009 at 7:53 pm

From Drudge:

http://washingtontimes.com/news/2009/apr/15/tossed-package-ends-white-house-tea-party/

Choice quote:

“A robot was inspecting the package, which the Associated Press reported appeared to be a box of tea bags.”

rocktonsammy April 15, 2009 at 7:54 pm

Finally a subject matter I’m interested in.

What is it again?

Dave J. April 15, 2009 at 7:54 pm

[re=291001]StephanieInCA[/re]: Is Shorts a hot female stripper with no morals whatsoever?

Carl Winslow April 15, 2009 at 7:56 pm

The comments on that last article are incredible!
“The media did die in 2008. They can not report on a story about like Obama without his teleprompter. Keep talking about Fox news. HAHAHAHA Every Republicon Demoncrat need throwed out of office and these bums at NBC that call themselves reporters! lol”

SnarkNotFark April 15, 2009 at 7:59 pm

Wait a second, did Markos Moulitsas take over this site all of a sudden? Oh please, oh please, I would scream like I’d just won the Miss America show if I could have a Diary Rescue someday, whatever-the-fuck Diary Rescue really means.

chascates April 15, 2009 at 8:05 pm

I’m proud to announce that I filed my taxes today but managed to leave out the $200 check I was going to include as part of my tax bill. I got a new taillight lens for my truck which was sideswiped 2 months ago and got it inspected with only one day left showing I had insurance which was canceled in December.
So I got a haircut and bought two 1.7L of Tito’s vodka.

GOD BLESS AMERICA

TRUCKNUTZ & BUTTSECKS FOR ALL

President Beeblebrox April 15, 2009 at 8:06 pm

[re=291005]ManchuCandidate[/re]: With tactical nuclear weapons, amirite?

dasNeonlicht April 15, 2009 at 8:16 pm

For good open threads, I think we need the sweet stacked commenting system that Gawker and Jezebel have.

Custerwolf April 15, 2009 at 8:22 pm

Boy, that takes me back. I haven’t had sex with a trash robot in a coon’s age.

problemwithcaring April 15, 2009 at 8:34 pm

[re=291021]facehead[/re]: I just hope they don’t throw a box of harmless dry leaves at a NY Times columnist or America will be preemptively bombing Yogi Tea headquarters in three months….

Ken Layne April 15, 2009 at 8:38 pm

[re=291001]StephanieInCA[/re]: Did we not link you, on teabagging day? Damn. Oh well this is what you get for the SEX TRICK re: Shorts.

Custerwolf April 15, 2009 at 8:38 pm

[re=291076]problemwithcaring[/re]: “Yogi tea”? Please tell me they don’t make that from bear gall bladders.

Ken Layne April 15, 2009 at 8:41 pm

[re=291015]Scandalabra[/re]: You don’t! Don’t have to have another account, that is. You should just be able to login with your regular wonkette commenter account. If this is not working, write me — I can forward yr DATE PROPOSAL to Emily, too. Servicey!

problemwithcaring April 15, 2009 at 8:50 pm

[re=291081]Custerwolf[/re]: It was a natural tea company – my mama used to buy it from a bookstore in Inglewood when I was little, and take it as a sleep aid. There was ALWAYS a guy with a headdress, or weird little Hindu gods, or a Jamaican lady with a do-rag, etc., on the front of the box.

Cicada April 15, 2009 at 8:51 pm

I love how on every article about teabagging that has comments, there are always tons of people posting who claim to be in the top tax bracket. They invariable want poor people to “do their fair share” or “work for a change”. It’s a veritable buffet of class war incitement.

I didn’t exactly like the wealthy before, but reading all of their condescending “get a job, poor people” rants is making me want to go all Bolshevik on their asses.

SayItWithWookies April 15, 2009 at 8:52 pm

But what the Boston Tea Party really proved was the global ubiquity of tea, the world’s first international drink.

Tea — it’s the new water.

dsdrane April 15, 2009 at 8:59 pm

I tried to make teabags with “Texas tea”, but it all dribbled out.

Does that mean something??

Custerwolf April 15, 2009 at 8:59 pm

[re=291095]problemwithcaring[/re]: Phew….

qwerty42 April 15, 2009 at 9:04 pm

This is a good idea Ken.

cal April 15, 2009 at 9:07 pm

That trash can is actually a Dalek.

hockeymom April 15, 2009 at 9:13 pm

Ken,
What is a Global/Internationalist?
Is that like an International Man of Mystery?

Custerwolf April 15, 2009 at 9:15 pm

[re=291124]cal[/re]: That’s a pretty fancy condom he’s wearing.

Come here a minute April 15, 2009 at 9:20 pm

Ken, you need not apologize for blog-whoring. More whore, less sorry

jagorev April 15, 2009 at 9:42 pm

[re=291082]Ken Layne[/re]: This is a good idea, but post it earlier in the day, like morningish.

Also, I can’t login on wonkabout, also.

bago April 15, 2009 at 9:52 pm

YOGA FIRE!

YOGA FLaame.

hrhkingfriday April 15, 2009 at 10:50 pm

[re=291080]Ken Layne[/re]: Mmmm I have this problem too. Can’t log in as kingfriday on wonkabout. Its ok, most of the places suggested are wayyy too hipster/for people just under 21.

anabellum April 15, 2009 at 11:26 pm

This whole day reminds me of that time Frodo was stuck in that stupid elf village…and all the elves are totally intent on their stupid elf projects, doing stupid elf things like combing their hair so they look like ex-members of Flock of Seagulls…and all Frodo wants to do is get on with his march towards ultimate-fucking-death cause he’s the only sane person in Middle Earth.

Take that, Teabaggers..

SayItWithWookies April 16, 2009 at 1:43 am

[re=291156]jagorev[/re]: [re=291244]hrhkingfriday[/re]: I have the same problem, but found a workaround. If you change the “wonkabout” in the URL of the page to “wonkette” and hit the enter key, it takes you to the same page but recognizes your wonkette login.

Links April 16, 2009 at 1:55 am

Wow somebody PAYS you to write this crap.

What can I say? I couldn’t resist. I’m weak and juvenile.

buggers April 16, 2009 at 3:44 am

Yeah love the open thread idea! though earlier in the day would be fun-er, like, when we’re all pretending to look for work rather than going out and gettin’ sloppy, like I was until about 30 mins ago. LOVE YOU KEN LAYNE!!!

hobospacejunkie April 16, 2009 at 6:21 am

I was hoping for a day when you’d tell everyone about all the fun story writing you guys do elsewhere. True/Slant is an interesting idea, I hope it succeeds. And I fucking love the commenters on Sara’s offerings. Don’t know why but she attracts the dumbest and most ignorant people on the planet. It is a gift.

TGY April 16, 2009 at 10:44 am

We at GHOPAC admire coordinated whoring whenever possible.

Bowdoin April 16, 2009 at 11:37 am

[re=291029]SnarkNotFark[/re]: Diary Rescue means someone is calling your attention to something you should see and probably didn’t. Like Public Broadcasting.

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