- President Obama will meet with credit card lenders and “press for reforms,” which is to say, ask them to quit being dicks and then they will say “Nah sorry,” and then the president will say, “At this difficult time, we need to be looking forward, not backward.” [UPI]
- The big question on torture, apparently, is not whether it is moral and in accordance with our national values; the question is whether it works. [New York Times]
- Freddie Mac is under a federal criminal investigation to see if the lender failed to warn about the risks associated with mortgage-related investments. The acting CFO of Freddie Mac just committed suicide. Coincidence? [Washington Post]
- Sorry, iPhone users, no more practicing child abuse on your phone. [Wall Street Journal]
- A suicide bomber struck in Baghdad, killing at least 28 people and wounding 50. We can probably expect more of this as the year goes on. [Reuters]
- Italy would like to move the summer G8 summit from a pleasant Mediterranean island to an earthquake-damaged city of rubble. [BBC News]
Credit Card Crackdown Imminent, Or Not! Probably Not.
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He will also say something like “The challenges are Too Great. The stakes are Too High.”
There goes my idea for a “waterboard your iPhone” app.
if waterboarding is such a fun-filled adventure for the whole family, when will Barbara Bush be waterboarded?
the stated purpose of this would be to learn who ordered the torture, etc.
but an added bonus: video of 17 CIA guys trying to restrain the beast would make a hilarious YouTube.
Great idea, Italy. Move from an island, easily turned into a fortess, to an indefensible, crumbling ruin. Looks like Berlusconi feels the same way about protecting Hopey as Il Duce did about the Ethiopians.
The comments on the WaPo article on the Freddie Mac CEO feature the usual wingnuts, of course. (“Was the guy who committed suicide found in a park?”) But they are also peppered with gems from someone whose native language appears to be French, expressing a viewpoint that is not clear to me.
This is my fave:
“I will answer in the same way. Your message has to be deleted for the eternity.”
Or, as I will say from now on: “YMH2BDFTE”
Snark off.
The regular and numbing reports of the random slaughter of innocents in Iraq has me seething more than usual, today. Each and every death there is directly the result of the criminal acts perpetrated by The Gang of W. They must come to justice. Congress and the WH are obliged to make it happen, as we are obliged to monitor their actions. The end.
Snark on.
Just when Afghanistan looked a lock to win going away in the “Hopey’s Quagmire Sweepstakes,” Iraq surges back into the lead!
OK, “Does torture work?” is a valid question, and one that can only be answered by Science. We’ll need to start by torturing Dick Cheney.
He’ll continue with “Upwards, not forwards, and spinning, spinning, spinning towards freedom.”
The fact that TWO people actually thought that iPhone Baby Shaker thing was a good idea, speaks oodles about how far we humans have to go before we reach maturity.
Shaken Baby Syndrome is fucking hilarious. That’s how Steve Jobs lost all the weight. The laffing.
Simple playground rules:
To get that sniveling kid to admit to something he didn’t do you beat the shit out of him and make him poop his pants.
To get that sniveling kid to tell you what that other sniveling kid just said you offer him your protection from the other bullies, maybe give him a piece of gum and put your arm around his shoulders in a buddy buddy fashion.
And for the love of all things right and good, waterboard the fuck out of Hannity! A mere 2 seconds will have that stinky pond scum crying for his mommy and some charity will benefit, natch. I bet they could get him to admit that he had butsecks with Limbaugh also.
As a caregiver to two former babies, I think the shaking-to-end-the-crying thing seems to be the parenting equivalent of waterboarding. It’s pretty dangerous, it’ll get you a result, but not usually the result you want.
I would never treat my iPhone so brutally. Also.
ok, actual baby shaking is unforgivable, but the fake baby shaking? fucking hilarious.
[re=297568]Custerwolf[/re]: The fact that Apple approved this app for their iphone store is motherfucking hilarious. I used to work for Apple and most of my fellow workers were the type to get down on their knees every morning & thank god they worked for the great & holy Apple. Or perhaps they were actually praying to Steve Jobs. Hard to tell. Anything that takes righteous Apple-lovers down a few pegs is win-win for me. Phones & personal computers were meant to provide material for masturbation, not to be the object of erotic desire themselves. Apple geeks often have trouble with this distinction.
So the credit card industry has one argument then, “unless we are allowed to keep screwing everybody over, we just can’t do business!”
I am truly pleased that America has finally confirmed that the ends justify the means. Now we can advocate the public dismemberment, dismemberment and execution (in that order) of Dick Cheney and G.W.B knowing that we will have the full backing of the Republican party and foxnews.
hilarious…unless you’ve spent any time around children who have suffered brain injuries, then not so much….let me restate that then nauseating like being kicked repeatedly in the balls until you piss blood just before puking small organs.
[re=297682]hobospacejunkie[/re]: Phones & personal computers were meant to provide material for masturbation, not to be the object of erotic desire themselves.
Don’t you judge me!
[re=297683]Gorillionaire[/re]: Considering the amount of mysterious charges and fees that have suddenly appeared on my credit cards over the past few months, all I can say is fuck ‘em.
I want to move Italy just west of Palm Springs; I am getting tired of Mexican food. But I can’t afford to put the move on my credit card. And torture is a very subjective term; we should experiment on credit card company executives to determine more objective parameters for defining “torture.”
Someone should market baby-shaped salt & pepper shakers.
Oops, already available:
http://www.tias.com/cgi-bin/google.fcgi/itemKey=1922531705
Let me state for the record that I don’t find the shaking baby app hilarious. As I wrote earlier, I find the fact that some fucknutz at Apple approved it hilarious. There is a difference. My cousin’s son has brain injuries from cancer on his brain stem. No more cancer, but the damage is done. That is most certainly not hilarious, nor is shaking babies.
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