• February 11, 2012
  • President Obama went after the budget with his promised “scalpel” and excised $17 billion worth of fatty tissue, which experts agree is really not very impressive at all. [UPI]
  • GM lost (only???) $6 billion in the first quarter of this year. [Washington Post]
  • Harry Reid is going to kidnap Arlen Specter and send him to a re-education camp, where he will be drilled on important Norm Coleman-related questions until he “breaks.” [New York Times]
  • The citizens of Jackson, Mississippi, killed their mayor by not re-electing him. [AP]
  • The WHO has to call the swine flu a “pandemic” if it starts spreading freely outside the US, but the flu has proven far less lethal than your run-of-the-mill pandemic. Will it sow seeds of needless alarm if the “p” flag is raised? (Answer: yes.) [Reuters]
  • A Catholic priest in South Florida finds himself enmeshed in scandal after he was photographed on a beach doing romantical things with an adult woman. [Miami Herald]

{ 44 comments }

dave666 May 7, 2009 at 9:07 am

A priest with an adult woman………………no way.

Bruno May 7, 2009 at 9:10 am

See once you start allowing gayz to marry, priests change their ways entirely.

freakishlystrong May 7, 2009 at 9:13 am

“A Catholic priest in South Florida finds himself enmeshed in scandal after he was photographed on a beach doing romantical things with an adult woman.”

Ummm…wasn’t that the craptastical Thornbirds?

Monsieur Grumpe May 7, 2009 at 9:13 am

Federal liposuction?

4tehlulz May 7, 2009 at 9:15 am

>>adult woman

I call bullshit.

Terry May 7, 2009 at 9:16 am

Jackson, Mississippi? The fried food, heat, and humidity is enough to kill a man all on their own.

TimesUp May 7, 2009 at 9:16 am

A priest with a bonner…must be from the order of Meljizzedick.

Cape Clod May 7, 2009 at 9:19 am

A priest shouldn’t shout out, “I LOVE THIS WOMAN AND I DON”T GIVE A DAMN WHO KNOWS IT!!!!”, in public. People tend to notice it more than when it’s done by some drunk with his homely girlfriend.

BillyClubb May 7, 2009 at 9:21 am

The WHO has to call the swine flu a “pandemic”…

What do musicians know about medicine? Yes, I’m sure they know about drugs, but a visit by the Gypsy Acid Queen will not really cure anything, just make you high…

TimesUp May 7, 2009 at 9:22 am

Reid should waterboard Specter until he recants since it’s not torture anymore. Norm Coleman also, just for the giggles.

TGY May 7, 2009 at 9:27 am

Wait, what frock do you wear on the beach? (Aka: WTF or WhatTheFrock?)

arclight May 7, 2009 at 9:36 am

OMG South Florida is so ghey…

glamourdammerung May 7, 2009 at 9:36 am

I guess that priests having sex with adults does not qualify for a quiet reassignment in a rural parish.

WadISay May 7, 2009 at 9:37 am

Prosecutors say [the mayor of Jackson, MS] was drunk on scotch and power when he ordered a group of young men — some with criminal records — to destroy the duplex in a poor neighborhood.

He had a blood alcohol of .15% and 220 volts of AC.

Personally, I prefer to be drunk on beer and power.

Monsieur Grumpe May 7, 2009 at 9:38 am

What do nuns wear on the beach?

MathewBrooks May 7, 2009 at 9:40 am

Isn’t this the plot of The Thorn Birds?

MathewBrooks May 7, 2009 at 9:40 am

[re=310535]freakishlystrong[/re]: dammit you beat me to it.

Serolf Divad May 7, 2009 at 9:42 am

[re=310551]Monsieur Grumpe[/re]:

Thongs?

Now there’s a good name for a band: Nuns in Thongs. If I ever start a rock ‘n roll band that’s what I’m going to call it.

AKAM80TheWolf May 7, 2009 at 9:43 am

[re=310551]Monsieur Grumpe[/re]:

A broken habit?

Crazybroad May 7, 2009 at 9:46 am

[re=310543]BillyClubb[/re]: Damn, beat me to it.

I would like to think of GM’s $6 BILLION loss as yet another fine example of my lovely city crashing and burning in grand style. Detroit knows drama, bitches.

bitchincamaro May 7, 2009 at 9:47 am

“Episcopalians look at this and scratch their heads.”

Today, we are all Episcopalians.

AKAM80TheWolf May 7, 2009 at 9:53 am

[re=310559]bitchincamaro[/re]:

I’m fine with that, as long as we are not Episcopalins.

TGY May 7, 2009 at 9:58 am

[re=310552]MathewBrooks[/re]: [re=310554]Serolf Divad[/re]: Possibly spawning a new novel entitled The Thong Birds, obvs.

hobospacejunkie May 7, 2009 at 10:02 am

Your mouth says adult woman but your eyes say altar boy.

magic titty May 7, 2009 at 10:02 am

Damn. Catholic priests get all the chicks.

JMP May 7, 2009 at 10:05 am

And here he was a couples counselor – damn father, don’t you know that Catholic priests who advise couples are supposed to have no clue what they’re talking about?

Come here a minute May 7, 2009 at 10:06 am

[re=310543]BillyClubb[/re]: I get on my knees and pray we don’t get fooled again, into pandemic panic.

bitchincamaro May 7, 2009 at 10:10 am

[re=310551]Monsieur Grumpe[/re]: What kind of meat do priest eat on Friday?

None.

/St. Brigid School, 1964.

bitchincamaro May 7, 2009 at 10:11 am

[re=310571]hobospacejunkie[/re]: Win.

hoosiermama May 7, 2009 at 10:20 am

Death Cab for Cutie? Anyone? oh.

Mr Blifil May 7, 2009 at 10:28 am

There’s something about that ad with the blond whose mouth is gagged that gives me a funny feeling…down there.

queeraselvis v 2.0 May 7, 2009 at 10:31 am

[re=310571]hobospacejunkie[/re]: Excellent. +1.

Min May 7, 2009 at 10:38 am

Obviously, Father Alberto hasn’t read the priest’s handbook. Dude, you need to become an Episcopalian.

A Better American Than YOU May 7, 2009 at 10:38 am

And the priest’s name really is “Alberto Cutié”?
Damn you for punking us, Miami Herald!

ManchuCandidate May 7, 2009 at 10:50 am

[re=310571]hobospacejunkie[/re]:
Heh.

Monsieur Grumpe May 7, 2009 at 10:51 am

[re=310554]Serolf Divad[/re]:
I played in a band called Douche Baggley and the Pink Bidets one night. I was one of Bidets. If you need a guitarist for Nuns in Thongs I’m there.

rachelv May 7, 2009 at 11:21 am

Re: the dead mayor. I thought “sledgehammer raid” was a figure of speech at first… wow.

Jerk Cade May 7, 2009 at 11:29 am

[re=310598]Mr Blifil[/re]: Yeah, Wegman dogs affect me that way, too

Godot May 7, 2009 at 11:34 am

[re=310543]BillyClubb[/re]: After that SARS scare a few years back amounted to nothing, we swore that we Won’t Get Fooled Again.

Custerwolf May 7, 2009 at 12:00 pm

It’s bad enough having Bono out there giving medical advice, now Pete Townsend’s trying to get in on the act? Personally I feel his talent could be better put to use directing ‘adult’-erous priests to the little boy’s rooms where they belong.

Custerwolf May 7, 2009 at 12:08 pm

[re=310614]Monsieur Grumpe[/re]: And if you need an extra bidet, I can help there.

Lascauxcaveman May 7, 2009 at 1:33 pm

[re=310614]Monsieur Grumpe[/re]: I’m not especially proud to say I sat in with a band named Aids Toiletseat and the Vaginal Bloodfarts back in the late 80′s when their bass player was in the hospital.

Needless to say, I was the only one at the gig dressed like Buddy Holly circa 1959.

Monsieur Grumpe May 7, 2009 at 3:22 pm

[re=310888]Lascauxcaveman[/re]:
We kicked around the name Vagina Bloodfarts at one time. Small world.
Hey, I saw a bass made out of an M16 in a music store the other day and I thought of you. Ted Nugent would love it. I think it was a real M16 at one time.

Lascauxcaveman May 7, 2009 at 4:08 pm

[re=311085]Monsieur Grumpe[/re]: Heh. Thanks, but no. Guns make lousy guitars ad vice versa.

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