It sure was Christmas morning for racists on the Fox News commenter forum today!
Let’s jump right in and see how some of these lovely folks responded to Fox’s breathtaking bait, “What funny BlackBerry messages would YOU would send to the president and how he might reply?”
- “Are you white or black?”
- “IS IT TURE THAT YOU AND HAGATHA HAVE TO COME IN THE BACK DOOR OF THE WHITEHOUSE?”
- “Do you think you would have made it into Harvard if you were white?”
- “Just a small reminder BO says:
June 4, 2009 at 11:14 am
YOU’RE H A L F – W H I T E!!!!!!!HA HA HA HA HA
not until his failures sink in. then he’ll be known as the cracka who screwed up.” - “i would ask why they made such a big deal about what dog hes getting when hes already got one bi.tch. (miche.lle) in the whitehouse.”
- “Pack yo bags B. hussein, you be movin’ to Liberia”
- “your a failure, resign now you idiot”
- “YOU HAVEEEEEE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME?!!!! “OBAMA’S FOR REAL”? YEA, FOR REAL AFRICAN. NOT AMERICAN SO INELIGIBLE TO POTUS. YOUR VIDEO SAYS IT ALL!”
- “when you are trown out of the white house dont dont forget to clean up the jerry curl off the oval office”
- “we dont need to impeach your azzz you are not legitament potus”
- “Barak the Majic N E G R O lived in Islam”
But so very few of them actually answered the whole question: how would he respond? Here’s one fine commenter who actually showed some goddamn effort.
Me: Mr. President, why do I have to show my birth certificate to get an enhanced license to cross the border, but you don’t need to submit one to be President?
B.O.: Uhh…let me find my uh…teleprompter. Okay, here it is. Because I’m uhh…trying to hide something, and uhh…you’re not.
Me: Are your “uh’s” already in your teleprompter script?
B.O.: Uh, yes.
Me: How much of our taxes is your teleprompter scriptwriter getting?
B.O.: None…(please insert your own ‘uh’s’ from here on in) it will be the taxes of your kids and grandkids paying him.
Me: Why are you so friendly with people in the Middle East that would love to kill us?
B.O.: I have so much in common with them with my religious background and all, and when I ruin America, or let them destroy it, I can always return to my place of birth in Kenya.
Me: Thanks for your time and unexpected truthfulness.
Well go on, Wonkette readers, join in on the fun!
You Decide! [Fox Forum]
{ 200 comments }
“your a failure, resign now you idiot”
Irony overload.
reading this shit makes me suicidal.
WAR HIS DAT BERF CERTIFIKATE YA HAW HAW.
These fuckers keep talking about the second coming of Christ— can he just come and take them now?
Dear Barack Hussein NOObama,
Who was better, the Stylistics or the Impressions?
(i ask because it’s the only question you’re qualified to answer without your affirmative action telerpromterr handy)
Thanks,
magic titty
I would include a link to that forum and ask him how he puts up with that shit.
President Obama, are you romantic and very affectionate, someone who freely gives hugs, scritches, cuddles and kisses?
“I have so much in common with them with my religious background and all, and when I ruin America, or let them destroy it, I can always return to my place of birth in Kenya.”
I love that he thinks Obama sounds like those Nigerian Investment Opportunity emails, for obvious reasons. Thus, the TelEproMteR
Dear Fox Forum,
Snark is not as easy as we make it look. Maybe practice some in private first, in front of a mirror or something.
Sincerely,
Wonkette
[re=332523]magic titty[/re]: Without question The Sylistics. I submit “Rock and Roll Baby” and “Stone in Love with You” into evidence.
Dear Obama,
Do you love Satan as we no you do? Check one Yes No
“OBAMA’S FOR REAL”? YEA, FOR REAL AFRICAN.
This is just too much to handle.
Well, half the population is below average in intelligence, and 20% of the people have to be in the bottom quintile, you know, the simple, honest workers and tradesmen and women who toil at the thankless jobs that keep america going; you know, morons.
for gods sake …. there’s 2 bitches. Dont forget about Hillary. I am very funny!!!!
They are losing their edge, not once did I notice the word “infanticide.”
” searching for the Truth says:
June 4, 2009 at 4:46 pm
The highway to Heaven is only through Jesus . All others have no ground.”
I wonder what kind of dent that left…
I might have just fallen in love with the last commenter, if only because s/he can spell, and is probably the only person on Fox News who can.
Dear Barack Obama,
As a moderate conservative, I respect many of your new policy approaches, yet I must disagree with some of your economic decisions. Do the manufacturing bailouts not have an overwhelming cost to implement per job saved? Could we not use the money to instead retrain hundreds of thousands of laid-off workers and give them financial support in this transition period?
HAHA DISREGARD THAT I SUCK COCKS
I tried to find a youtube video that mashed Nobama and Michael Jackson’s Black or White. America disappointed me. I only found two and neither were anti-Nobama. This one at least has some Jesus-lovin’ in the beginning. So much wasted potential, America.
Genuiz rites:
I AGEE WHOLE HEARTEDLY!!
It’s the Masons rites:
U.S. Citizens’ 4 Economic Freedom says:
June 4, 2009 at 11:48 am
Stop spending money that isn’t there. Cooperate when we investigate ACORN and its multiple affiliates sponsored by Soros, Lewis & the Sandlers.
_____________________________________________________________________________________
We know that your buddy Bruce Ratner owns 1/2 of the NY Times bldg. All oy you corrupt leftists hide under the same rock, ACORN, et al.
Hey R.a.g.h.e.a.d., my Children were all born in Hawaii at Queens and St. Francis Hospitals. Their Birth Certificates Look nothing like that phoney piece of C.r.a.p. you put out . How about the truth .Or don’t you know what that is.???
matt says:
June 4, 2009 at 4:10 am
got watermelon?
@ME: President Obama, where was that stooped and mealy-colored old man I used to call poppa when the merry-go-round broke down?
@RENEGADE: Nuts.
How many of the posters on the Fox Forum were actually Tucker Carlson?
how do you stand the racism from teh stupidz?
WHEN WILL U BE INTRODUCIN THE AMEROS????
Wow, this makes me want to publish a book called “Racist Childrens’ Letters to Obama.”
Why do I have to choose between buying food and buying weed?
I would probably ask where he gets those crisp, white shirts. I wouldn’t mean anything weird by “white,” either.
PZ: Why’s everyone so racist on this forum?
BO: The Internet brings that out in people. Anonymity.
PZ: So you don’t attribute it to being FOX?
BO: Fox didn’t make them racist, it only gathered up the racists and brought them to one place.
PZ: So does it bother you?
BO: Well, you know… they can say what they want, but I’m president. Haha.
PZ: Thank God!
Lietuva says:
June 4, 2009 at 2:44 pm
Me to Barry S: I need an explanation. I went to Ask.com & entered “did obama get foreign student status at college”. The site directed me to AXJ: Action for Justice Intertnational Forum. YES, OBAMA GOT AID FOR BEING A FOREIGN STUDENT FROM KENYA.
Countdown to when a small town elected official asks: Would you trade your birth certificate for a telepromptr made of watermelon, fried chicken and welfare? and then twitters about/mass emails it to the world…
It sure was Christmas morning for racists on the Fox News commenter forum today!
Jim, Fox News makes sure that EVERY DAY is a gift to racists and simpletons.
For those who aren’t aware. The latest and greatest Obama conspiracy is……………………………………………………
He’s a clone of an egyptian god!!!1
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GqZBTzx7lp0
Can you please give California money to build bullet trains to Vegas?
” katie says:
June 4, 2009 at 10:56 am
Your company might be doing better the last 5 months but what about the other millions of people. What do you do for a living? Let’s see how well your company is doing here soon. When other people fail that is money that would go to your company, so until everyone is doing better your company will not stay stable!”
Anyone know of a link to a good wingnut translator? I’m having trouble deciphering this one on my own.
1362 comments and counting (makes us look a bit puny here). Can’t read past the first few:
“Don’t be so sorry all the time, you’re making the United States of America look like sad sacks.”
Yeah, whereas guys like you make America proud, right?
Q: Who got Fosterized so that you could scuttle the Whitey Tape?
[re=332523]magic titty[/re]: Impressions… with or without Curtis Mayfield? I think it’s a trick question…. you diabolical bastard.
Min: President Obama, would you, as a personal favor to me, promise to never again speak to or otherwise acknowledge anyone affiliated with Fox News, in any form or fashion, until Edward R. Murrow rises from the grave in righteous outrage and bitchslaps the entire lot of them?
Barry: Okay.
They are already moderating the hell out of it. WHAT HAVE YOU PEOPLE DONE. We couldn’t even get in a question about TELEPROMPTERZ? This is unAmerican.
What the hell would racists do if someone stole their caps lock key?
So much for expanding the base and moving beyond racial stereotyping. I wonder what the “best commenters” receive. An honorary KKK membership? 24 karat gold plated trucknutz? Stockpile of ammunition?
Here’s an idea, use the screen name of other people on that forum and pretend you’re them.
Dear ACORN,
If your dog Bo barks while the rest of the family is praying to the east, do you beat him?
[re=332569]shortsshortsshorts[/re]: mention jesus and then you’ll auto go through.
A true racist not only misspells Jheri curl, but has no idea what it is. Other than something vaguely Negro. I mean, c’mon: he could have at least mentioned Soul Glow.
[re=332571]Dave J.[/re]: SHOUT LOUDER INTO THEIR MOUSE!!!!!!!
WHy DO YOU HATE AMERICA??!????!?!?!?!? also bill ayers rvd wright secret muslim tellypromters ACORN
Prezent Nobama: Are you just Jimmy Carter in blackface?
[re=332540]Mr Blifil[/re]: That’s because these comments were “funny.” The preborn holocaust is no laughing matter, son.
“Barak the Majic N E G R O lived in Islam”
Love how “negro” is the only word he made an effort to spell correctly.
Wow. After reading three pages of those comments I feel like I was in a room full of preschoolers fighting over the last lollipop. Must buy beer and aspirin on the way home.
[re=332521]american mutt[/re]: Me too. I was going to make a joke and then I read the first five comments and I was overcome with anger and irritation. Maybe I shouldn’t be surprised by rampant, ignorant, moronic racism, but I guess I like to expect more from human beings, if you can call these Fox Forum frequenters human beings.
Q. How do you intend to completely marginalize the Republican Party?
A. By creating open forums where the extreme right wing revels in their blatant racism and idiocy so as to demonstrate to the moderate republicans the true nature of their party, thereby disenfrachising them and moving them over to the Democratic Party.
Why didn’t they just title it “Open Post”? I’m sure the results would have been the same.
[re=332569]shortsshortsshorts[/re]: OUR FREEDUMBS OF SPEECHES IS DOOMED UNDER THE FASHIST REJEEM OF GOULAG OWNER, AFRICAN HILTER BARRACK HUSSEIN LUCIPHER NOBAMA. NO EXCUSE ME WHILE I GO SNIFF MORE AIRPLANE GLUE AND WATCH BECK 9.12.
IT’S MOOSE-LIMB TelEpRomPTerZ!! WHERE IS BIRF CERTFACE?
[re=332572]PrairiePossum[/re]: Well, they probably don’t need an honorary KKK membership or a stockpile of ammo, and the gold TRUCKNUTZ are probably too negro for them, so I’m guessing they get a signed photo of the Palin child of their choice to furiously masturbate to.
Where is the Rhode Island Department of Retardation when we need it most?
[re=332522]shortsshortsshorts[/re]: Seriously. Let’s get on with the Rapture so I don’t have to deal with these jackasses anymore.
Which half of Tiger Woods swings the golf club?
Fox-tards of the world untie
“Thanks to the VERY few posters who know the difference between your and you’re”
Like a cool burst of fresh air through a pig farm.
[re=332530]loquaciousmusic[/re]: Hilarious.
HEY OBAMA
BET YOU DIDNT WEAR A FLAG PIN CUZ U WERENT SHURE WHICH FLAG TO PICK AMERICA OR KENYA LOL
[re=332522]shortsshortsshorts[/re]: I am SO begging for Jesus to come back and take his goddamned whiny children away. I have babysat them quite long enough.
Personally, I’d love to take a brief trip to Heaven, just long enough to watch Jesus whip the shit out of his “children”, for being such hard-nosed, insensitive, selfish people. O, to learn from the Master about goodness and virtue and selflessness… and holy revenge!
Some things are meant to stay buried over in the FOX Friends areas of the intertubes. For the good of us all.
[re=332567]Canuckledragger[/re]: With.
[re=332534]sham69[/re]: But what about People Get Ready and I’m So Proud? Hmm? We’ll have to wait until NObama responds…
[re=332536]Jim Newell[/re]: B FARE JIM NEWELL HEE WUZ BORN IN ENGELAND.
Unabounding idiocy knows no bounds.
Q: WY DID U BOW DOWN N KISSS MUZLINS AT METTNG DID TEH TELLEEPRMOTERS TELL U TA DO TAT??!!!!???
A: It was my predessor, George W. Bush, who kissed the King of Saudi Arabia, not me, you fools.
I just copied and pasted a Kanye West blog rant there.
how is babby formed
how girl get pragnent
What? No one has suggested “A nigger says what?”
[re=332549]bfstevie[/re]: Trick question. They are all Tucker Carlson.
Jesus! Where the fuck is the Rapture, Kirk Cameron? It just can’t come soon enough, can it?
“when you are trown out of the white house dont dont forget to clean up the jerry curl off the oval office”
So not only is he an illegal Kenyan Muslin, he’s from 1991? The nerve!
H e w a s b o rn t h e i l l e g i t i m a t e b a s s t e r d s o n o f a k e n y a n m u s l i m a n d a w h i t e K a n s a s W HO RE.
Thanks, Specialist G, for: “Mr. President, even though the vast majority of Americans support you and your policies, there are inbred, home schooled hillbillies who wet their beds over the fact we have a Black President. How hard do you laugh at them?”
An enormously large publicly traded media conglomerate is sponsoring this nonsense/hatred. Fox really does need to step back and observe what they are sowing. BTW: I’ve heard it pretty straight that Murdoch and I quote from someone that really God’s truth worked for him, Murdoch “has a problem with the blacks.” No shit seriously.
How is this possible:
Hi BO: Get lost or find a big hole and jump in and pull the dirt in behind you….
Gee whiz, you’d think the yahoos at Fox have a shutter-threshold, the point at which the ugliness they pander to makes them throw up in their mouth a lil bit. Apparently they likey.
Alright, whomever posted these-
Q. What important advice did Dubya give you when you two spoke before the inauguration?
A. Dunk the pretzels in water first.
Q. Iceberg or Romaine?
A. Neither, Arugala.
- WIN. Also.
I am crying with laughter. Fuck me, but teh stoopidz are out in force.
[re=332565]19kevin8[/re]: translates to:…looks like some ninja chick just goosed Slow Joe.
If Babmi-O is “TOTUS”, may we now call Slow Joe “D’OH!TUS”?
Because it all means the same thing- N000Bamza1!1!!11
Anyone know of a link to a good wingnut translator? I’m having trouble deciphering this one on my own.
Don’t use Babble Fish for translating wingnut-ese. I tried it once and crashed their whole network for the rest of the day.
[re=332618]orange[/re]: I’m assuming that that was posted by a Wonketteer?
You are such a musical people. Are you teaching your beautiful children the native music of their land?
Well done, people, it appears virtually 50% of the comments on the first page are about TruckNutz!!! in one form or another.
There is absolutely no way these people will believe anything other than what Fox, Limbaugh et al., are cramming down their throats. They have no sense of history, let alone the irony that their voting choices hurt them economically. Enraged by evolution, homosexuality, and abortion they believe any authority other than the self-selected ‘Right-thinking’ pundits is against them and lying to them. If it was Hillary instead of Obama they would be slamming her as a lying, cheating lesbian hell-bent on socialism as well.
I love my country but I think it’s time we saw other people.
Oooh! Someone made the “Blackbarry” connection! Lulz all OVER the motherfucking place.
[re=332553]tunamelt[/re]: Make brownies, duh.
“HAGATHA” is by far the most baffling word in that entire hell-mess.
[re=332591]El Pinche[/re]: You make sad people happy all over the world. You are like the Mother Theresa of the Internets.
[re=332614]AlexisHidell[/re]: How dare Wonkette tempt me to post in a forum… full of idiots… while I’m at work!
FOR SHAME. That’s not “NSFW” we can believe in!
WHERE IS MY RING!!!!?!
correct use of “you’re”? enough awareness of Liberia to use it in a racist joke? some of this is pretty heady for these folks…
It brings a tear to my eye to see such a fine example of democracy in action.
[re=332625]picadillythirds[/re]: Guilty on the first one. Notorious BIVALVE, beeyotches!
…frankly I’m surprised that all of the questions didn’t start with: “How many n#ggers does it take too…”
It’s good to see that the comments at Fox are now teabagged with Truck Nutz.
Bummer – apparently they blocked my ip after several Truck Nutz-related posts. Oh well, back to work.
Right Wing Translator
Dear President Obama,
I am concerned with the following things:
Your place of birth, your muslimicity, your bowling score, your activities as a community/communist organizer, your knowledge of street thugs (both black and Chicagoan), your choice of congratulatory hand gesture, the homosexuality of your vegetable preferences, your hatred of white people including your grandmother, the throwing-under-the-bus of said grandmother, your alleged supernatural negronitude, your wife’s black supremacist church tirades and the records thereof, your obvious possession of the mark of the beast, the drug use of your African-black brother, your transmission of control over the means of production to the government, and your love of sexually educating five year olds and personally killing abortion-surviving babies with a combination of your bare hands and islamo-commie-negronic magic. Why won’t you admit to any of these very true things?
I read 7 or 8 pages in, and then I had to stop. The death threats and invitations to commit suicide were really beginning to bring me down.
I weep for my country.
I went back to page 1 of the comments, and saw this one… it was actually pretty good, for a “blackberry/texting” motif:
A Berger says:
June 3, 2009 at 9:21 am
Saudi King: Mr. Obama, I told U no bow in public.
Obama: But I wannab BFF
Well, on second look, it still sucks. But if you consider it was 63 minutes after original post, that’s pretty damn swooft for the output of an uneducated redneck.
[re=332590]NoWireHangers[/re]: Winner, lol. You are so right.
Like a linguistic Galapagos, the tardosphere provides us a living, farting, masturbating example of how language confined to a closed system adapts to fit the environmental pressures of that system:
For example, “bi.tch. (miche.lle)”– while ee cummingsesque at first glance– most likely indicates a clumsy and primitive attempt to evade the auto-censoring of expletives and other trouble-words (see[re=332586]mdotsota[/re]‘s N E G R O-noticing above for another example). We can thus infer that this learned behavior was elicited from real-life adaptive pressures- to wit, there exists one or more actual websites wherein such commenters have so frequently engaged in casual misogyny and race-slurring as to require the employment of censorship software by the sites’ proprietors (in response, of course, to their own environmental pressure of irrelevance-by-association), despite any ideological sympathy for such language.
What’s amazing though- and this is where the teeth really hit the bone– is that rather than upping their syntax or getting the message to more successfully cloak and elide their cosmological awfulness, the commenters have instead found a way to drop bi.tches and N E G R O S regardless.
As Mark Twain once said, after all, “the difference between the right word and the almost-right word is the difference between the lightning bug and the lightning.”
So yeah. Galapagos negro lightning. Shit is retarded.
[re=332652]I_P[/re]: I got IP blocked last week for my hate email to O’Reilly.
The surprising thing is that 85% of those comments were written by John Gibson and Brian Kilmeade.
[re=332658]goodluck/badluck[/re]: That gets my vote for comment of the day, mostly for “Galapagos negro lightning.”
[re=332658]goodluck/badluck[/re]: That was “inspiring.” Did you know, however, that a lot of people don’t need to be read three times in order to understand their point? SIMPLIFY, MAN— you don’t have to write a diatribe so anti-opinionated that it seems insulting. Be more funny.
Clearly the statistics relating 3rd grade literacy to future residency in the clink are complete bullshit. True, these fuckers should be in prison but since they’re not…
[re=332658]goodluck/badluck[/re]: I nominate you for post of the day. I’d say WIN!1!1! except for the possible bannination.
[re=332658]goodluck/badluck[/re]: slow clap
What funny BlackBerry messages would YOU send to the president?
I think, Fox News, what YOU meant to say was “what funny Magic-NegroBerry messages”… Also, Fox should encourage people to submit their rantings in webcam form, for extra slack jawed wingnuttery.
[re=332658]goodluck/badluck[/re]: Chinchilla sunburn theology. Additionally.
T Nutz says:
June 4, 2009 at 6:44 pm
Q- Do you agree that John Gibson is an self-loathing butt pirate?
Got through.
kemosabe says:
June 4, 2009 at 1:00 pm
A C O R N
Anti
Constitutional
Organization
Ra cists
N egro es
Wow. Nothing like a “them niggers is racist!” comment to throw my own self-delusions into perspective.
Should I go to a free vodka night in a sketchy area of Los Angeles even though I have work tomorrow?
Yes, we can.
[re=332629]AnnieGetYourFun[/re]: probably. lots of work involved and things appear to be spelled correctly.
also, there’s no evident stank.
[re=332658]goodluck/badluck[/re]: Took the words right from my teleprompter. Youtube commenters however, have it all over Fox commenters any day of the week. Except for today.
[re=332658]goodluck/badluck[/re]: “All generalizations are false, including this one.”
I mean god dammit do we really have to jump into this? Or maybe “I can live for two months on a good compliment.” DO NOT QUOTE TWAIN. HE WILL DESTROY US ALL.
I wish every day could be a war blogging day with extra truck nutz.
[re=332675]tunamelt[/re]: What part of LA is this?
[re=332654]Min[/re]: Nah don’t be sad, look at all the wonketters out there, counter-commenting, we are kicking their ass cuz we are way funnier.
[re=332579]american mutt[/re]: Huh. Turns out they don’t like it so much when we use their names. Shocking.
Me: I found out there is a small nuclear device in the Fox News building. When will you call in the air strike?
BO: There are many Fox News affiliates around the country. We need precise intelligence. Which building is it in?
Me: Does it matter?
[re=332675]tunamelt[/re]: [re=332682]american mutt[/re]: You know, maybe one of these days we should have a Wonkette/LA booze night. It seems like a good idea, but then again, it’s never wise to view the man behind the curtain.
Hey guys, just to throw a point out there: the common assumption here that these commenters are probably all poor hillbillies is more than a bit off. I know it’s hard to stomach, but I’m going to bet a good portion of those comments come from people at the same economic level as many Wonketteers, or higher.
See helpful map: http://www.stat.columbia.edu/~cook/movabletype/mlm/6graphs2008.png
I’m just sayin.’ You CAN go to college and learn nothing, including spelling, as long as your parents make plenty of money …
[re=332682]american mutt[/re]: [re=332690]NoWireHangers[/re]: It’s actually in the area I live in, so calling it sketchy is really just a commentary on How I Live.
Mr. President:
Do you believe that Republitards who take Faux News as gospel will be sucked into a black hole of their own wingnuttery, and if so, would it be better characterized as the Anti-Rapture or the Cosmic Colonic?
[re=332658]goodluck/badluck[/re]: ohhh. that’s why people use those dots. wonkette is returning as my place of higher learning.( that was not poetry)
[re=332683]mrpuma2u[/re]: You’re sweet.
Give ‘em hell, boyz.
Hmmm mine did not show up, WHAT IS WRONG. Here’s what is said:
Howza cum colerds alway rich n white alway poorr in merica!
evy white christin is poor n caint get hep why cum? i ben pryain on this n know I know what ahppen, jesus dont love white poeple know more.
i been christin for 29 years since i was 18 i had lord cum in my hart but er. i dont beleve anymore.
jesus i think is just n1gg3r lover or worse, hie was an arab right? well arab same as n1gg3r, like obama.
[re=332608]magic titty[/re]: Oh Noobama is too young to answer that one. What I want to know is “Where was Etta James at your fancy dance? Was she stuck with a purple ticket?” [re=332649]
AngryBlakGuy[/re]: Welcome home. I spent an hour yesterday with your diary and learned a lot.
AH WELL WONKETTE PEOPLE in LA, I’ll be there tomorrow night. E-mail teh shorts@shortsshortsshorts.com, unless you want to kill me. If that is the case, I will rick-roll you.
[re=332677]bankruptcamaro[/re]: I always imagined some grizzly couch-bound Santa Claus of racism who magically comments on every single youtube clip ever.
[re=332679]shortsshortsshorts[/re]: you’re right, I’ll admit, but as you pointed out above i’m kind of self-indulgent, word-wise. So here’s one more, ponderously on-topic:
“I don’t give a damn for a man that can only spell a word one way.”
This is the blogwar we needed to bring us together after a week of banhammering and whatnot.
Also, I wonder if the boys over at Fox are so angry because they seekretly wanna buttsechs with BHO.
[re=332639]Josh Fruhlinger[/re]: I just assumed “Hagatha” was Broomhilda’s cousin or somesuch and a cartoon expert person such as yourself could verify that for us civilians.
[re=332699]Ken Layne[/re]: They have a very refined filter for heresy at Fox. The theological implications of having jesus cum in your heart set it off.
Pretty much every comment from the past hour just got wiped.
Oooohhh yooou sneaky Fox moooods! *shakes fist at sky*
Dear Mr. President,
On days like this, when you get actual, written evidence that a pretty good chunk of your country are illiterate, racist, retarded assholes, do you ever want to hit a sharp wall with your face over and over again? I know I do.
[re=332612]The Brothman Prophecy[/re]: +100,000 for the SA reference.
[re=332692]Tra[/re]: The only people with money in teh red states are angry Burger King and Chick-Fil-A franchisees.
Ach, Gott im Himmel, FOX News. Was ist mit unserer Amerika? Fickst du, arschloch!
[re=332718]mattbolt[/re]: So, uh, they left all the racist rants and deleted the satirical ones? Really?
…
Fascinating. I can’t WAIT to see their “top five.”
[re=332701]shortsshortsshorts[/re]: I really would be up for it, but I have an out of town friend coming in tomorrow for a wedding. Someday…
[re=332693]tunamelt[/re]: Koreatown is only mildly sketchy.
[re=332725]President Beeblebrox[/re]: But the people who work for those franchises voted for Obama.
The most ignorant, conservative people I know are middle class to wealthy. You have less room to afford to be stupid when you’re poor. And you don’t have a lot of time to sit around typing racist screeds on Fox News sites. Or, usually, a computer.
Why do you all go on right wing sites? I am so happy in my liberal oblivion.
Ah shit. IP banned. It was fun while it lasted.
[re=332699]Ken Layne[/re]: Probably the word “cum” got censored. Give it another shot, champ.
[re=332751]June Cleaver 2.0[/re]: this is a warblog. JOIN US!
[re=332699]Ken Layne[/re]: I think they’ve just effectively deleted every post from the last two hours….except those from a recognized Klan ip, that is.
so annoying…I wanted to post a second part but it won’t let me…guess I’m no longer allowed… le sigh.
@POTUS: Maybe if you came out about following this book, more of the illiterati on Fox News who just learned to use the internets might support you and stop shooting doctors in Kansas. GNOC!
@E money: I WOULD BUT THE REST OF AMERICA, AN UNDENIABLY CHRISTIAN COUNTRY, EVEN THOUGH THE UNION OF CHURCH AND STATE IS SPECIFICALLY BANNED BY THE CONSTITUTION, IS NOT READY FOR THE POWERFUL MESSAGES CONTAINED IN ELIYZABETH ANDERSON’S BOOK AS CONVEYED TO HER VIA THE HOLY SPIRIT DIRECTLY. SHE’S MY IDOL…TOTES. CD9 (Biden) LOL! TTYL
[re=332665]shortsshortsshorts[/re]: I disagree, shorts. As a science nerd, I laughed at the first pass. Needs more TruckNutz, however.
“Barack, please turn down the Isaac Hayes album, Cheney just hanged himself!”
hope I’m not repeating any prior post but when Mr. Hoover’s G-men…uh, whateverthatguy’s name is has those all American G-men toss a few subpoenas around, grab the Fox servers and get the IDs of those posters, there’s gonna be some fun reunions in the supermax. Oh…wait, the Fox servers get so totally wiped out regularly so even those folks at No Such Agency can’t retrieve the stuff.
“q: mr. president, if i have a hard time telling the difference between idiots posting on fox forum and people posting on fox forum to mock the idiots posting on fox forum, does that make me an idiot who is also posting on fox forum?
a: …”
Which one of you fine people is responsible for this act of hilarity?
[re=332796]Mad Farmer Manifest[/re]: I wish I could claim it.
[re=332796]Mad Farmer Manifest[/re]: and this….
“legitimizing idiocy, however, well as you can see…we effing rock at that. I mean look at us tardz. Despite all evidence to the contrary, despite every verifiable truth; we still believe you’re a muslin terrist, born on eastor island, gey, illiterate, and out to turn us into your white slaves. Say what you will about fox viewers but WE DO NOT GET OUR BIGOTRY CONFUSED BY THEM PESKY FAKTS!!!!”
The whole thread is taken over with TruckNutz and mockery. Well done, mighty warbloggers.
Oooohhh…apparently I’m unbanninated! Moar TRUCKNUTZ!
[re=332796]Mad Farmer Manifest[/re]: guilty.
you can see how Fox’s audience believes “fair and balanced” : the “reporters” concede to the liberal p.o.v. by not being OVERTLY racist (usually), like they are.
Oh right, it’s all coming back to me, why I promised never to set foot in the USA again…
[re=332808]iantenna[/re]: As punishment, you get 3 whore diamonds.
Those folks postin’ over on the FOX Forum (which is NOT like the Penthouse Forum of my adolesence) need to spend some time on adultfriendfinders and get some serious whoop-on to relieve such pent-up sexual frustration.
Is it funny anymore? Or more like laugh so ya don’t cry?
[re=332815]Mad Farmer Manifest[/re]: thanks, though i had to consult urban dictionary on that one. do i lose whore diamonds as a result?
It hurteth my head too much–
“Obama, you cannot education our youth”…
And it’s far too late to education this pack of ‘tards.
1. get pelosi to admit mistake that she lied
2. with the evidence pelosi seen and did not admit
3. prosecute with that evidence cheney, w bush, rice and rumsfield
4. turn them over to the hague
5. pelosi to resign after figures go to jail for life
Anyone have a clue what this gem might mean?
It really sounds like it should have a link to a blog featuring pix of projectile diarrhea
Fucking IP-banning Fox Motherfuckers!!!!1! Okay, besides the lack of snark, what’s wrong with the following?
Me:
Dear Pres. Obama,
Do you find Fox News commenters to be dumb-azz crackers, or just a bunch of ignorant racists?
– slug
Obama:
Dear Slug,
You seem to be repeating yourself. The best term for those people, who seem to be hung up on pickles, mustard, salad greens and birth certificates, is humourless dumb-azz ignorant racist crackers.
– O-man
The thoughtful, cogent posters at Fox Forum are making me doubt one of my core librul beliefs. Im pretty well convinced now that this whole evolution thing is a bunch of bullshit.
“B.O.: None…(please insert your own ‘uh’s’ from here on in)”
Now that’s just lazy. The commented was clearly a darkie.
[re=332827]x111e7thst[/re]: I think it’s something about Pelosi lying about her moonlighting gig as a dominatrix, and the high-level government officials who were her clientele… or maybe they were placing some illegal bets on cockfights.
Dear Nobama Muslin Commnist Soshialists ACORN librul messiah: we demand secession, teabagging and scritches for every FOX viewer!
Ah yes, the eloquent, insightful commentary of the far right in all their glory! All displaying their masterful command of the English language, incisive powers of argument and debate, and sterling red-state educations! They need only a leader worthy of them–a Megan McCain I say–who will surely bring their exalted Repubatard party back to power!
[re=332629]AnnieGetYourFun[/re]: Except wouldn’t a Wonketteer be smart enough to know you don’t need the adjective “whore” after “Kansas?”
[re=332699]Ken Layne[/re]: Clearly the docents over at Fox News felt your comment would go over the heads of their audience. You have a CAPSLOCK key on your keyboard for a reason. Use it!
[re=332562]american mutt[/re]: I think we found the eye of the perfect storm of crazy.
http://thefreemanperspective.blogspot.com/
The capitalization and spacing of N E G R O resembles ads for slave auctions in 18th-century newspapers. Hmmmm!
HAINOUS! I can’t get a word in over there. It is HAINOUS! or maybe it is HAINUS.
[re=332832]EdFlinstone[/re]: On the tree of evolution, there are branches and twigs. I believe these people are more the twig variety.
[re=332800]19kevin8[/re]: Mine. Unfortunately for Fox, Northern Virginians still haven’t learned to secure their routers. They’ll have to IP ban half of Fairfax County to stop me.
[re=332808]iantenna[/re]: I would gay marry you for that beauty.
You guys rock.. The Wonkette presence on the Fux Forum (wasn’t Forum the name of a letters to the editor feature of Hustler?) is sheer brilliance. I luv u guys!
[re=332853]AxmxZ[/re]: Holy crap.
[re=332853]AxmxZ[/re]: Well my goodness but that is truly original refreshing and open minded.It’s like our old friend Nadine but with nice pictures. Sometimes I love the internet.
If anyone’s tired of messing with the Foxfarts, you can always help Atrios stuff Dobbs’ ballot box. Scroll down to the lower right. http://loudobbs.tv.cnn.com/
Gosh, I hope someone has forwarded this stuff to, I don’t know…Jon Stewart, Keith Olbermann or the Secret Service.
Whichever.
Who’s the dude on the right side at freemantv? He really rockin that 70′s pornstar look with a healthy dose of to catch a predator creepiness.
[re=332562]american mutt[/re]: wait! one of the comments! what’s the ‘o’bama reverse (yes we can) speech’ video that’s very scary???
anyone?
oh i found it:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TMOpw3GY0Rk
how do people have this much available time and not be on wonkette?
What’s with the “M.ich.elle is a b.itch” and “N E G R O” stuff? I see it on HuffPo too. Is that to avoid getting flagged for moderation or something?
[re=332893]102415[/re]: [re=332888]imissopus[/re]: I wonder if this person realizes that he’s a character from an Umberto eco novel?..
Just read a few pages.
Awesomeness to all Wonkeeters.
But.
Where the hell is the fight in those tards? No rebuttal?
Or am I confusing the Wonktards with the Foxtards?
Or are the Wonktards posting both sides?
I need to go drink now.
Q. Is Rush Limbaugh really a child sex tourist or does he just play one on TV?
A. The FBI is looking into that.
When you eat your Bilderburgers and French Socialist Fries, do you use K-chip or Muslintard?
[re=332692]Tra[/re]: Excellent observation. I also used that map to interpret the best places to spend money, and revitalize the economy in liberal states. May be time to take that vacation to scenic New Mexico…
“Barak the Majic N E G R O lived in Islam”
Where exactly is Islam? Is that a country or a city? You would think that Fox News viewers would at least educate themselves, you know, crack a book. Oh wait.
american mutt says at 5:12 pm, June 4th, 2009
- Reply
reading this shit makes me suicidal.
———-I actually already killed myself and am a ghost. I started to write a comment on the shit posted there, but the words simply escape me. Unreal.
Dear Mr. President:
Does the secret magic underground tunnel from the White House go to the Greenbrier Resort; the secret mountain hidaway near Fort Ritchie in Western Maryland; Area 51; Tyson’s Corner; the secret bunker beneath the Vice President’s House; Chief Ike’s Mambo Room; the Pentagon; the secretive Pentagon II facility; CIA headquarters in Langley, Va.; Pendelton Harrington’s McLean Estate That Is Really a Secretive Government Facility in McLean; or the Crystal City Underground Bunker Facility?
Thank you!
YOu shoLd be tortur teh unamarikans WhO direPEkt teh oFFIce of PRezidint and Call yur wife Bad nams.
See, I wouldn’t even read that crap unless it was here. Somehow organizations(or disorganizations) like Fox think it is okay for racists/idiots to post things like that.
And Frontpage- the secret tunnel goes to Five guys cause both Barack and Michelle ate there.
There does seem to be some form of moderation over there. My question had to do with how many miles of cock Roger Ailes has sucked during his life, and there is a two hour gap in the comments from when I posted. And the irony is, it’s a question I actually want to know the answer to.
jeebus christi, I got out of town on business and THIS is what I miss? Hell, I need to quit this job. Conservitard warblogging is ten times as amusing as PUMA warblogging. (plus, less dander)
[re=332692]Tra[/re]: Wait, where’s the graph for the $75K-$150 voters?
Also, I heard from a reputable source that Rupert Murdoch has FOX tattooed on his scrotum. Why would he deny this?
Faux news = greatest comedy channel of the 21st century…and their viewers are the biggest clowns of all!!
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