America’s top bone-shattering Moral Megaphone to the Foreigns, Hillary Clinton, after months of begging, has finally been granted Nobama’s permission to deliver her first major speech as Secretary of State! (18 million cracks, natch.) In her address this afternoon at the Council on Foreign Relations, the famous lady will declare America’s ardent support for capturing terrorists, not capturing non-terrorist muslins (like four people total), preserving human rights everywhere all the time, fixing some minor Israeli/Palestinian tiff, nonproliferation of rad nukes, saving economics, and the climate changes — you know, gay stuff. And yet there is still one comical bit about how America can still just bomb the fuck out of everybody when all else fails, leading Politico‘s Mike Allen to label this a “muscular” speech in his definitive preview.
NOT THREATENING you people, not implying anything, we still want to be diplomatic and I am the nation’s top diplomat — A+ for me, Hillary! — but at the end of the day, we simply prefer Warring.
“Not everybody in the world wishes us well or shares our values and interests. Some will seek to undermine our efforts. In those cases, our partnerships will help constrain or deter their actions.
“And to these foes and would-be foes, let me say: You should know that our focus on diplomacy and development is not an alternative to our national security arsenal. You should never see America’s willingness to talk as a sign of weakness to be exploited. We will not hesitate to defend our friends and ourselves vigorously when necessary with the world’s strongest military. This is not an option we seek. Nor is it a threat; it is a promise to the American people.”
“Yeah, no shit, but thanks for the reminder anyway, Devil-Princess,” the foes and would-be foes have responded, on Twitter.
Clinton’s “Muscular” Foreign-Policy Manifesto [Daily Intel]
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PUMA’s all over the great republic wept with joy between bites of Snackwells.
That’s a pretty presidential sounding speech. Does this mean she got the promotion?
When Hilz flexes her cankles, she sends a chill down the collective spine of the muslin terror-types.
Hil was packin’.
I’m glad we aren’t giving up on Warring. Its almost time for a new one.
[re=363133]pedestrian rage[/re]: Come now. You can do better.
i bet you the nobamas/freepers are going to froth at the mouth about how much they love hillary, unless she’s president of course.
[re=363133]pedestrian rage[/re]: You should BE WARNED. Cankle Jokes are SOOO 2007.
Alt text: today we are all comedians and/or pirates.
And if we ever find that ginormous invisible Iranian embassy in Managua, we’ll bomb it too. Hint: it’s right behind the T.G.I. Friday’s, hidden by a 23rd-century cloaking device (don’t ask).
I’ll tell you what, I was ready to vote for Hillary’s cankles over Nobama’s gangley frame, she’s one hot dame.
You should know that our focus on diplomacy and development is not an alternative to our national security arsenal.
She’s totes the type to whisper gently in your ear while pegging the living shit outta ya.
[re=363140]51dimes[/re]: Maybe we can start one where we can finally use all of those F-22 Raptor’s that we built to help out Saxby Chambliss — but are so far just gathering dust.
It’s actually kinda cool and a bit surprising that Hilz is doing a good job as SecState, and not just posing for photo ops and stroking her own ego like the last one did. This “competence” thing Hopey has introduced might just work — as opposed to, say, hiring your amigos from Skull and Bones and the Petroleum Club.
On paper the speech is pretty mild — what’s really going to set the tone is when she delivers it dressed in a Valkyrie costume.
Also, re: “months of begging:”
Q. What’s Mark Sanford’s definition of foreplay?
But also please remember, nefarious world, allow us time to consult with our soldiers before we start the warring on you, so we can make sure none of them disagree about the pedigree of their commander-in-chief and decide that there are some forms of America they are not willing to defend (I refer of course to Reserve Major Minor and his Oily Taters).
I love how she smiles politely to all those folks listening while holding a frying pan behind her back.
A. What’s the difference between a Secretary of State and a pit bull?
B. Peacekeeper missiles.
[re=363133]pedestrian rage[/re]: When Hilz flexes her Kegels, she sends a chill down the collective spine of the muslin terror-types.
/fixt (sorta)
[re=363174]Extemporanus[/re]: thanks for the fix. I will be cringing under my desk for the rest of the day, fearing the ban hammer of dated references.
[re=363169]slappypaddy[/re]: As for Major Minor – he and his dentist just won a great victory. Or maybe not.
http://www.wnd.com/index.php?fa=PAGE.view&pageId=104009
Thank goodness; I thought we were throwing $500 billion yearly into the military-industrial garbage-heap for nothin’.
Oh yes, Hillary is flexing her Secretary of State muscles. That’s why she was left home for the Cairo speech and the Russia visit. She must be at least in the top ten of people Obama asks when he needs a view on some foreign dealy or other. Hard to argue with the (Tina Brown’s?) assertion that the Clintons have been well and truly nullified.
She’s wearing a piece from her new “Bomb them!” pantsuit line.
Can she see Russia from her White House?
In our quest to uphold the peace, let us not lose track of the fact that there’s nobody more peaceful than a dead troublemaker.
[re=363188]x111e7thst[/re]: Well, if he got his orders rescinded so the Army could send him somewhere to count left-handed shift-shifters and paint rocks, I guess that is a victory of sorts.
Duck and cover North Korea…Hills is comin at ya, Strangelove style!
[re=363212]mrsixinch[/re]: Duhhh, “SMOKE-shifters.” But “shift-shifters” can be counted too. If one isn’t shiftless.
[re=363162]BobLoblawLawBlog[/re]: Thank you, sir or madame.
[re=363200]hobospacejunkie[/re]: “the Clintons have been well and truly nullified.”
Indeed. Hills thought she was getting a promotion when she was tapped for Seccy of State, but Sun-Tzu Master Obama, he who so seldom misses a trick, knew what a pain in the ass she could be if she stayed in the Senate, so… “Hold your friends close and your enemies closer.” We salute you (or grasshopper slappypaddy does), Master Obama.
[re=363200]hobospacejunkie[/re]: Hey, she was in Egypt for the speech.
http://www.talkingpointsmemo.com/images/obama-clinton-egypt-blog.jpg
And Hillary’s actually been busting her but in foreign policy — granted, it’s not as high-profile as a lot of other stuff going on, but she’s anything but nullified.
Anybody watch that film on the International Criminal Court last night? Hillary? Anybody?
[re=363233]slappypaddy[/re]: Yobama Jedi Master?
“Nor is it a threat; it is a promise to the American people, so NYAH!”
Fixed that for her.
[re=363248]bitchincamaro[/re]: Compulsory jurisdiction is so Europe.
Later this week, Hillary will be allowed to moniter the Oval Office and write names on the chalk board while Pres. Unicorn is away.
[re=363188]x111e7thst[/re]: Orly Taitz looks like she (?) should be selling orange juice to people who hate teh ghez.
If I had been named at birth Saxby Chambliss, I would have worked it an entirely different way, but I’d be rich too.
i like hilz in this position. she’s smart, she’s a bitch. we need em both.
‘hope and change’ need ‘i WILL drag out the PURPLE pantsuit’.
this is the very apex of modern diplomacy.
[re=363165]SayItWithWookies[/re]: LOL! @ the Valkyrie costume.
Hillary Clinton, Secretary of State and Lord Protector of the People of Columbia. Remember you foreign fucktards; you have to get through her to get to Obama. So, if you’re thinking of coming up in here with some funny business, you best think, again, you dirty, muslin t’rristes.
The carrots, sticks, and coercive diplomacy puppet.
Remember the Clinton sanction starvation of Iraq?
Israel-first dual-nationals of AIPAC and The Fed cover up the crimes of 9/11.
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