- Bazillions of dollars have been pledged to Red Cross relief efforts in Haiti via cellphone, just as Florence Nightingale would have wanted. [New York Times]
- The situation in Port-au-Prince is not improving. [Washington Post]
- Viktor Yushchenko, the Ukranian president who was quite handsome until that unfortunate poisoning incident, will likely soon be replaced by a more Moscow-friendly, less poisonable counterpart. [BusinessWeek]
- Massachusetts’ new Ted Kennedy may be a former nude model who hates healthcare, which is to say, the exact opposite of the old Ted Kennedy. A new poll suggests that New Ted Kennedy has gained some serious ground. [Washington Post]
- Now that there’s no longer a Pig AIDS vaccine shortage, nobody wants the vaccine, so doses are languishing on the shelf until the next crisis hits (at which point everyone will be sad the vaccines are expired and useless). [Des Moines Register]
- Latest installment in the Leno/O’Brien/NBC feud: All shows are cancelled and will be replaced by a permanent loop of Rosie O’Donnell shaving her armpits in a tub of Jello Pudding. [New York Daily News]
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{ 32 comments }
That clip of Rosie may go a long way to solving the obesity epidemic, who could snack while watching that?
Jesus H. Christ. Haiti is the most desparate situation I think I have ever seen. They’re going to have to pile the corpses someplace and set fire to them.
“Putin said in a live call-in show last month that he wasn’t supporting Timoshenko in the elections and reminded viewers that his United Russia party has “special relations” with Yanukovych’s Party of Regions.”
Putin party has special relations with Yanukovych’s Party of Regions. Sounds dirty but is probably more actually frightening.
[re=495256]proudgrampa[/re]: A friend of mine friends with aid workers down there was looking at pictures yesterday, and was amazed at all the dead bodies covered with blankets, some with blankets under them – she said there aren’t that many blankets down there to start with, which people would use to keep off the mosquitoes at night, but instead they’re using what they do have to cover the bodies out of respect.
But I have to say, “The situation in Port-au-Prince is not improving” wins second place in the DUUUH! awards. First is yesterday’s NPR article with the headline, “Buildings in Haiti not adequate for earthquake.”
What flavor pudding?
That seismic shock was not another Haiti earthquake. It was Angry Uncle Ted spinning in his grave.
So we know now that 500 Massachusetts voters are nuts, or at least a majority of them. How about the rest of the state?
[re=495259]Redhead[/re]: “Buildings in Haiti not adequate for earthquake.” Yeah, that one wins the No Shit, Sherlock Award.
If the situation in Haiti isn’t enough to make you sick, that image of Rosie O’Donnell sure is. Thanks, Sara!
The problem is logistics. I understand that boats are sitting in the harbors but can’t get unloaded, supplies are sitting at the airport but there is no way to move them into the city. The corpses have to be gotten out of those buildings before they rot, that would be a medical nightmare as a second wave of deaths would result from disease caused by all those rotting bodies in the rubble. It’s a nightmare.
I never thought I’d say this, but they need Baby Doc back, he was a murdering pig of a man, but he had a way with zombies. Think about it, the dead would dig themselves out of the rubble, deliver the humanitarian aide and then bury themselves, I’d be willing to give him every one of Rush Limbaughs cabana boy/sex slaves if he could pull that one off. I think he’s hanging out with Haley Barbour on one of his faux plantations, has anybody got Haleys number?
Jay Leno is a former nude model? You wouldn’t think so to look at him (but he was famous long ago). All these people replacing others, some Irish, some dead, some of the opposite sex, it’s confusing. I recognize their faces but have to give them all another name.
[re=495265]dijetlo[/re]: For this reason Bush can’t get there soon enough…
Leno and even Conan can be lame at times, but either one is better than all those crap cop shows they have on NBC.
Help…on the way…
In the short term, the U.S. military is bringing in ships equipped with helicopters to fly supplies and equipment to land. The USS Carl Vinson was scheduled to arrive Friday with 19 helicopters and 30 pallets of relief supplies.
The US military has found its niche in the new millennium.
We’re sending Rosie O’Donnell to entertain Haiti? Maybe Pat Robertson was right.
The US military has found its niche in the new millennium.
Flying in relief supplies? Offering humanitarian aid? Hauling important cargo to backward cultures? What is this, Starfleet?
LMAO @ “less poisonable”
[re=495272]Naked Bunny with a Whip[/re]: Exactly! Someone will come up with the Prime Rib Directive, shortly. There will be tribbles.
[re=495267]Mr Blifil[/re]: Bush has a way with the short bus crowd. Even Zombies have standards, I don’t think they’d listen to him. Besides, he couldn’t save New Orleans with living people. If you haven’t spent the last ten years pressure welded to your barco-lounger watching Fox, he’s the wrong kind of bokor.
The other thing we have to remember is, this is too important to trust to a known incompetent. We need Baby Doc. The Tonton Macoute is about the only thing that could restore Haiti to it’s halcyon days of squalid, barely survivable, soul grinding poverty. A bunch old, fat Americans wheeling around on their gov’ment-paid-for rascals howling about socialism isn’t going to be much help to anyone, we’d have to evacuate them as soon as their batteries died.
[re=495265]dijetlo[/re]: I’d rather see bankers and their lobbyists hauling the dead and wounded, though; I can’t say we could stop them from finding a way to make a buck at it, in terms of penance, it’d be a start.
[re=495277]dijetlo[/re]: Actually I was just hoping he’d be there to catch a whiff of Ebola or whatever horrible illness leaps off of decomposing bodies to eat healthy ones.
[re=495279]bitchincamaro[/re]: Yes, they’d be selling securitized body parts for voodoo rituals, the bastards.
[re=495276]TGY[/re]: Still no gays, though.
[re=495291]Naked Bunny with a Whip[/re]: Yeah, bummers about that. It will happen, eventually. They might be the last bastion, however.
[re=495291]Naked Bunny with a Whip[/re]: You’re not thinking outside the box, Bunny. There are vast opportunities for gay necrophiliacs, I imagine the Republican Congressional Caucus will be organizing a “fact finding mission” to go down there and figure out how long a body can lay in the rubble under the hot, tropical sun before it’s sphincter is no longer suitable for “sexy time”. I’m not certain how many of their members like to hang out in the local morgue waiting for teenage car crash victims but if the history of that caucus is any indication, there are bound to be a couple.
[re=495279]bitchincamaro[/re]: Why do you hate the Haitians so?
[re=495272]Naked Bunny with a Whip[/re]: Jesus Christ. Win.
Mugged Weekly Stranded editor John McCormack now has sadz.
****
http://www.weeklystandard.com/tws/daily/daily.asp#blog-413010
DC Police Shuts Down Brothel Near Weekly Standard Office
Sorry about the pro U.S. guy who got poisoned by Putin but whatever happens in the Ukraine is fine as long as pictures of Yulia Timoshenko like this one keep showing up.
[re=495272]Naked Bunny with a Whip[/re]:
Rush Limbaugh says that this is a clear violation by Demrats of the Prime Directive. Court martials are in order!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K3IkZl1Kzno
[re=495261]Gumboz1953[/re]: Actually, Mass. Dems are shocked by the poll numbers. Hopefully, the Dems will be energized to vote. I live in Arlington, MA and the town has never voted for a Republican for any office. People of Mass, please don’t forget to vote for Coakley!!
TubGirl hosted by Rosie , late nights on NBC!!!
DONT SUPPORT HAITI! DONT DONATE AND GIVE IN TO BIG GOVVERNMENT! YOU ALRADY DONATED WITH YOUR HARD PAYED IMCOME TAXES.
Seriously, this is what I’m seeing at winger sites. I just flip flopped on Eugenics.
[re=495389]El Pinche[/re]:
Upside: Very inexpensive programming to produce.
Downside: Low ratings
Sideways-side: Except among the kinky-fat-lesbo demographic
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