- People might hate President Obama, but they hate Congress more, so … epic win for healthcare reform (if Obama fires Congress)? [AP]
- Chief Justice Roberts does not think the Supreme Court is above criticism — just above public criticism. [Los Angeles Times]
- Liz Cheney’s “who are these terrorist lawyers, defending terrorists?” video was so repellent to members of the legal profession that even some Republican lawyers were turned off by it. [New York Times]
- Bank of America will eliminate the whole “We will charge you $35 if you overdraw your account when you pay for a 69-cent pack of gum” thing, which makes them Heroes. [SmartMoney.com]
- The First Couple of France is rumored to be having wild affairs with, let’s see, a gal who kinda looks like Carla Bruni and a man who looks like Benicio Del Toro crossed with Prince Valiant. PICS OR IT DIDN’T HAPPEN. [Telegraph]
- What is with the people always getting mad at the Scandinavian cartoonists? [ABC News]
-
Authors
Kaia Mursi (45)
Kirsten Boyd Johnson (800)
Jim Newell (5431)
Wonkette Jr. (628)
Liz Colville (96)
Blair Burke (171)
Garrett Quinn (13)
Ken Layne (6696)
Matt Langer (40)
Arielle Fleisher (385)
{ 34 comments }
You know it’s bad when Ken Starr shakes his head disapprovingly.
I can understand Carla straying from the presidential bed, and I appreciate that the French public expect their leaders to have affairs, but does beaky-nosed dwarf Nicolas Sarkozy really wake up in the morning, look at his wife and think “well, she’s alright I guess, but I’m really out of her league – an attractive guy like me could do better”?
Roberts needs to take some unjustified outrage lessons from Sarah Palin.
Even Alan Dershowitz objects to the Cheney video, but when he suggests that lawyers should be allowed to *provide cutting-edge advice* to terrorists I can’t help but wonder it that whore is not trying to squeeze a retainer out of Bin Laden himself.
Liz Cheney’s “who are these terrorist lawyers, defending terrorists?” video was so repellent to members of the legal profession that even some Republican lawyers were turned off by it.
All together on 3: THEY’RE NOT REAL REPUBLICANS!
Mark my words: if it turns out that Sarkozy and Bruni have an “open” marriage and are actually engaging in regular foursomes with the named “affairs” (which I strongly suspect is the case) I.am.moving.to.France.
Did anyone catch Thiessen’s attempt to justify Liz Cheney’s bullshit on The Daily Show last night? It’s not that they are attacking lawyers for representing unpopular clients; it’s just that, by interjecting themselves to uphold the Constitution against some vague alleged threat, they’ve proven that they hate America and want the terrorists to attack.
Then he started yelling at John for contradicting him and not letting him just monopolize the whole conversation. Dick.
Chief Justice Princess G. Premenstrual
This Scandinavian cartoon makes me mad because it’s drawn so poorly. It really needs some stink lines to be truly offensive.
http://ekstrabladet.dk/grafik/nettet/tegninger40.jpg
American politicians get into trouble for having affairs because they have affairs with ugly people or “the help.” Bill Clinton got into trouble not for the affair, but because he was messing around with an employee. He was out president, and a person of that stature should have been messing around with Claudia Schiffer.
Case in point: No one cared when JFK messed around with Marilyn.
Not sure why Carla Bruni likes ugly dwarf men.
Considering she’s the daughter of a lesbian pornographer and the vilest golem ever to walk the face of the earth, Liz Cheney didn’t turn out too bad.
So will BofA still let me buy my $2 coffee and just not charge me the fee, or will they deny the transaction?
“Ey, Roberts. I see ya’ got somethin’ on yer sweater there.”
“Oh? Where?”
“Right… HERE!” *fist flies in uppercut motion to Roberts’ chin*.
Mayhem ensues.
(apologies to NatLampoon)
[re=527745]Serolf Divad[/re]: That’s what appears to be the case with the reports of Gov. Patterson’s & his wife’s “affairs”. That sort of thing should be fine if it works for the couple, and not our business (the attempt to cover up the staffer’s sexual harassment, on the other hand, is a real crime); but in America we demand our politicians live up to puritanical standards.
Cheney-McCarthy wedding in 3..2..1
[re=527738]Hello Sunshine[/re]: It is not sexism, it is a truism, the old saying that the men like to remember, in order to console themselves, when a woman of incredible beauty walks by, and they know that they will never, ever, not even in their imaginations, ever get to bang a woman like that. What we say is “whenever you see some incredibly beautiful woman, remember, somewhere, there is a guy who is sick of fucking that.”
[re=527743]Hunger Tallest Palin[/re]: No real republican can be a lawyers settle disputes within a system of justice which is based on evidence and facts and in which the decision is made by an impartial judge or jury. The New Model Republican, typified by Cheney, ignores the facts, lies whenever convenient, and tortures and murders anyone who opposes them.
Read “No real republican can be a lawyer; lawyers settle disputes. . .”
[re=527745]Serolf Divad[/re]: I join in this pact with you, regarding France and moving there. I regard their enlightened and sophisticated ways about such things with abject awe.
[re=527780]Prommie[/re]: [re=527745]Serolf Divad[/re]: I say screw it, we go anyway. I’m trying to get a job there now! We could form a continental wonkette brigade, some sort of escadrille lafayette, and well, that’s as far as I have gotten into this AM’s coffee, so I am out of steam.
Also, next time we have a header “nothing’s shocking,” would it be too much to ask to get the jane’s poster? This week has been so incredibly gay, it would be nice to get some boobies, and flaming heads.
[re=527776]Prommie[/re]: Sorry, but this is crucial. (It’s too late to unfuck Godwin’s Law, but this one can still be saved.) The ancient wisdom, handed down from father to son, is: “No matter who she is, how hot she is: some guy, somewhere, is sick to death of her shit.”
See how it applies to the current strife, but also explains quite a lot of recorded intra-celebrity difficulty? That’s because it’s true. Princess Grace’s old man came home with a load on, one night, and took one look at the missus and said, “Jesus, what a pain in the ass. I’d give real money if she’d just shut up for one night, or maybe take less than ninety minutes to get ready to go out.” If this isn’t true, the Universe isn’t true.
“Jihad Jane???” WTF?
[re=527827]GreenHalo[/re]: We could move their to protest socialized medicine; do they allow alcoholics to get liver transplants? When their name isn’t “Heinz?”
[re=527756]the problem child[/re]: Me neither, but it IS encouraging for ugly dwarf men everywhere, isn’t it?
Goddammit, I agree with Roberts about something.
[re=527849]Prommie[/re]: Um, I don’t get it. I was trying to correct “he’s bored with fucking her” to “he’s tired of her shit,” and if you don’t think that’s a significant difference, ask your married friends. Socialized medicine, liver transplants, the Heinz family: no comprende.
Although, can I just say “harvesting the dead” is such a cool phrase. “Now, many many lifetimes later, we harvest the organs of the dead! Urrrghh!” I can’t stop loving that, especially when the lid is being blown off the practice and a major motion picture about repo men taking back organs is about to hit the screens.
(Dear Crazy Uncle Larry: Okay, you MIGHT have some kind of point about organ harvesting, but as far as bankers controlling the world economy, and oil companies spending billions to define the discussion on climate change, you’re still Black Helicopter Cray-Zee, you lovable precious-bodily-fluids crank, you. I’m certain of it. Love, G.H.)
[re=527874]GreenHalo[/re]: So sorry, that was meant for Serolf Divad and Crank Tango. As to your crucial difference assertion, I am just saying, I have heard variations, and really, the degree of shit one that can be put up with is directly proportional to the degree of “not tired of fucking” anyway, so its not that crucially different, I would think.
Liz Cheney = cunt
[re=527888]Prommie[/re]: One might argue that “The first person to mention Nazis loses the argument” is functionally equivalent to “As a political discussion continues, the probability of one side comparing the other side to Nazis approaches one.”
One would be wrong, of course. One would have to have a sort of psychological tin ear. One would miss the point by several degrees of latitude and longitude. But one could plant one’s flag and claim the ground in the name of Planet X, regardless. It’s a free country.
The idea that being tired of having sex with someone is equal to being tired of someone’s shit is fascinating and possibly revealing, but not really interesting as a philosophical point, if you’ll excuse me.
Wasn’t it Shakespeare who said “First let’s kill all the cartoonists?”
[re=527933]GreenHalo[/re]: Sorry, sir, we simply disagree. Being tired of someone’s “shit” is an unremarkable, mundane observation. Everyone gets tired of shit, and some people have lots of it. The remark that one would get tired of boning an incredibly hot chick, this is a remark which is surprising, and goes against what one would think, it would seem unlikely, to one wh has never boned a truly hot chick, but on reflection, and from observation, it is actually true.
Your version is also true, its just boring.
She is so much like her father in so many ways. In fact, her clit is so freakishly long that she uses a urinal.
[re=527849]Prommie[/re]: There is talk of France changing back from socialized medicine, because it simply DOES NOT work. The same could be said for Canada, the man from their country that is the equivalent of our surgeon general had to come down to the american-canadian border and be treated in AMERICA because there were enough doctors in canada because of their “enlightened and sophisticated ways”(socialized medicine).
Comments on this entry are closed.