We’re so glad that Lindsey Graham is leading the immigration reform push again, in this latest attempt to seal our terrible borders and treat illegal Mexicans humanely while still Punishing them. This is called GRAHAMNESTY GRAHAMNESTY GRAHAMNESTY and we wish Lindsey Graham were actually serious about doing it, instead of just using it as lame crybaby leverage over the health care bill.
In a statement after the Obama meeting, Graham predicted that their effort would collapse if Senate Democrats proceeded with a strategy to pass a healthcare bill through a simple majority vote — a process known as “reconciliation.” Senate leaders say they are committed to doing just that.
“I expressed, in no uncertain terms, my belief that immigration reform could come to a halt for the year if healthcare reconciliation goes forward,” said Graham, who portrayed the document handed to Obama as “a work in progress.”
Graham added: “For more than a year, healthcare has sucked most of the energy out of the room. Using reconciliation to push healthcare through will make it much harder for Congress to come together on a topic as important as immigration.”
Wow! What ever happened to strongly agreeing on some issues and strongly disagreeing on others, and judging each on its own merits? Well, that was always a bullshit line, but it stuck.
These people. Now they’re trying to justify ETERNAL REVENGE AGAINST THE OTHERS! as a civilized governing strategy. Are they beginning to realize that they may have peaked too soon, with the insanity?
Even the Democrats are starting to call bluffs. Oh hamburgers, if we use this legal procedural process to get something done — a collection of fixes to a newly-signed law! — then the Republicans WON’T WORK WITH US ANY MORE, out of puerile anger. CRAZY SAD WORLD THAT WOULD BE. It’s always best to give in entirely when Lindsey Graham starts making public threats about how he’ll mope around the Senate floor, sniffling like a jackoff, if Democrats pass their major piece of legislation. Besides, Lindsey Graham almost certainly has 10 to 15 solid Republican votes for this type of immigration reform in his back pocket. It’s not like GOP constituents would get upset if their representatives support a bill that stops short of calling for Mexican Genocide.
[LA Times]
Read More:
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- Massive Pro-Immigration Rallies To Be Ignored Nationwide Tomorrow
{ 56 comments }
For the record, I never want to see the words “sucked,” “harder,” and “come” issue from Lindsay Graham’s lips EVER AGAIN. Unless, of course, he’s referring to him comparing notes with Eric Massa.
Heh. Bravo, Newell. That post was just about perfect.
Outside of Scott Brown, has any of those DBs vote with the Democrats on anything in the past year?
Can we get the Repiblicans to hold their breath until they turn blue, and then just a little bit longer after that?
Also, Graham swore he’d “de-friend” Obama on Facebook and never write on his wall again.
What ever happened to strongly agreeing on some issues and strongly disagreeing on others, and judging each on its own merits?
Hahahaha. Jim, you’re just so darn cute sometimes, I just want to come up and pinch those cute chubby lil’ cheeks.
Also, since immigration reform is about, oh, somewhere between 24th and 32nd on my personal congressional wish list, I think can live with Lindsey’s little pout-threat.
[re=529512]Doglessliberal[/re]:
Problem though… how can you tell when they’ve suffered any brain damage?
[re=529516]Lascauxcaveman[/re]: Ha that’s why I said “bullshit” in the next line!
Yeah the problem is that “all Hispanics” demanded this bill in Obama’s first two years, and stupid Obama of course promised to do it, and if he doesn’t then they won’t vote for Democrats. Stupid democracy.
That’s like when the hitchhiker in your trunk says that if you kill him and bury him in the woods, he won’t help you kill and bury the next hitchhiker. Um — hypothetically.
Oh, well, if its going to have a negative influence on the remote possibility that the senate is capable of doing something about immigration, obviously Obama will recognize that now is the time to throw in the towel on the Health Care Reform.
Its not like his administration has been preoccupied with the health care bill for the past year, and the possibility of a bipartisan immigration bill first came up, what, last week?
Can’t you try just a little bit harder?
Can’t you try just a little bit more?
[re=529520]Jim Newell[/re]: “All Hispanics” are just as likely to abandon Obama as Lindsey Graham is to line up 15 Republican votes for immigration reform.
George Bush did the best job ever on immigration reform — now that there are no jobs, illegal immigration has declined. Yay compassionate conservatism!
Dear Republicans:
Here’s your toys. Take them, and go the fuck home.
Respectfully,
Democrats
[re=529508]queeraselvis v 2.0[/re]: actually, the whole line is rather grossly sexual– “Using XXXX to push XXX through will make it much harder for Congress to come together ….”
[re=529516]Lascauxcaveman[/re]: “…immigration reform is about, oh, somewhere between 24th and 32nd on my personal congressional wish list…”
Couldn’t agree more, Lascaux. We have wasted so much time on health care, ferchrissake, that we’ll be lucky to get to number 3 or 4 on the wish list. What a freakin’ waste.
What a spiteful little bugger. I love the way he absolves himself from this with the passive voice.
Golly gee, I just don’t know how the Senate could pass immigration reform if reconciliation is used for health reform.
Well.. you could try, or even pretend to try for starters.
Graham sounds “gaudily confident” that the Repugs won’t invite Obama to their next darktown strutters ball if recincilliation used. Gaudily confident, I say.
How is that these geniuses can make governing the country tantamount to trading Pogs? And will this in any way, shape, or form inhibit my ability to access breakfast tacos? Also.
So, does that mean they’re going to vote “no” all the time in addition to dragging everything out with procedural crap, spreading disinformation through their media arm, and stirring up para-fascist populist resentment? Or is it an either/or kind of thing?
– Alex
[re=529526]Sharkey[/re]: Don’t know why, but you reminded me of Voice Immodulation Syndrome:
AND A LITTLE BIT SOFTER NOW…
AND A LIITLE BIT SOFTER NOW…
AND A LITTLE BIT SOFTER NOW…
http://vimeo.com/1913104
Guess it’s just the way my mind works.
Let’s not forget, the health care bill would have passed long ago if that bitch flight attendant hadn’t forced Chuck Schumer to turn off his cellphone.
Are you happy now, bitch?
I’m sure Hispanics will appreciate the fact the Republicans are essentially telling them that they could either get health care or they could get immigration reform but not both.
I can imagine several forms of leverage applied to the esteemed Senator, though most of them involve the use of double-layer neoprene wetsuits, assorted dildoes, snorkel hoses, and the URL of the online retailer who provides Dorothy’s Ruby Slippers in men’s size 10 1/2 EEE wide. Plus doesn’t he suck dicks for a living, or something?
[re=529508]queeraselvis v 2.0[/re]: Also, push, stuck and in.
Gotta love this one for the title:
http://www.nytimes.com/2010/03/12/business/12lexus.html?hp
Didn’t know Asians felt that way about taint.
what are you guys talking about, no compromise? Last week it being “rammed down our throats”… now it just sucks & is pushed through, making it “much harder”… They’ve come along way… Next we’ll start getting cute little Foley-esque IM’s asking what it’s wearing… This is real progress, people!!!
Today, we are all living in a Crazy Sad World.
[re=529548]Mr Blifil[/re]: Spoken like a kink aficianado. Although I’d wager Auntie LG is more of a pleather harness-and-buttplug-the-size-of-a-fire hydrant sort of girl.
[re=529545]Hooray For Anything[/re]: For real. And I’ve gotten the impression that Hispanics who vote are better at paying attention and spotting bullshit than the white poors who vote for these Republican idiots and are so easily distracted by anything the Repubs throw their way.
(Look! Over there! A shiny new threat to the white peoples of our country, and/or their ‘values’!)
Excuse me, are you down with this whole social justice thing?
[re=529509]Tommmcatt[/re]: Agreed.
The birthday boy has earned himself an extra chocolate graham cracker!
CNN International did a poll of the American housewife recently… 64 percent of the gringitas cheat on their men.
Extrapolating from this data, it is obvious that at least half of you gringos, when you… How you say, eat out your wife? When you eat out your wife, you are eating the seed of the other man.
This is disgusting to me. And also very sad.
Why not combine health care reform and imigration reform. We would agree to let the illegals in as long they work in the health care field. This will significantly reduce health care cost as they will work long and hard for practically nothing. As an added bonus, many of them have a strong working knowledge of the pharmaceutical field.
Republiklan bipartisanship=Do things our way or fuck you.
[re=529559]snideinplainsight[/re]: Funny thing is – 99% of the time, here in Wonketteland, the context is perfect for that question. Well done!
[re=529537]The Silver Fox[/re]: And the whole thing is based off the idea that passing anything through reconciliation would be the worst violation of procedure ever; which the Republicans made up out of whole cloth about a month ago, and the media dutifully claimed has always been the case.
Of course, that’s only become necessary because the Reps decided to start filibustering every single bill, which actually is at odds with Senate history, though enabled by the bullshit rules that enable filibustering by merely saying they want to filibuster.
Wow, Lindsey’s threat to not make the Democrats deal with immigration in an election year dominated by Glen Beck has to be up there with “If you keep touching me, I will have sex with you.”
[re=529559]snideinplainsight[/re]: Well, since Glenn Beck has announced that social justice is code for socialism, and all true conservatives should leave churches that say they care about social justice, I’m thinking his answer is “No”.
If we go slow on Immigration Reform the way we did Health Care, the Right Wingers are going to be able to help themselves – the signs will come out depicting sombrero wearing spiders encompassing the globe, Mexicans with rat bodies, just like they did the Japanese in WWII. They’re going to mortally insult every Hispanic person in the country and quite a few around the planet.
Let them. The only reason there’s a Democrat sitting in the Oval Office right now is because of the ex Governor of California Pete Wilson, who is the unspeakable creature who kicked into gear this latest anti Mexican furor in the first place.
I recommend giving yourselves fake Latin surnames and writing letters to the editor of all the Red State papers about how this land is your land and white people smell bad. Write one every day. Then watch all the good things happen.
Not to nitpick of a lazy Friday aft., but do jackoffs tend to mope & sniffle, as a rule?
Yeah, I guess they do. Kindly disretard this entry.
“Like a jackoff,” indeed, given the source, but I admit to a regional preference for “jagoff,” one of the three seminal Chicago words with “tavern” and “pal.” A jagoff seems so much more sinister than a jackoff, a word with an almost doll-like ring to it.
Where’s Newell’s happy birfday thread? Anyway, happy birfday, Mr. Newell!
Maybe Massa and Graham will come out of the closet today.
Ooh, it’s the birthday of sexy young ginger-boy? I’ve got his present right here!
Seriously, though, many happy returns of the day, Jim.
[re=529608]Tommmcatt[/re]: And here all along I thought “Jim Newell” was an algorithm designed to rearrange snippets captured from various stories of the day, weighted toward winning the morning. Happy Birthday News Randomizer!
[re=529557]queeraselvis v 2.0[/re]: Pony Girl, definitely.
Reason #26 for ramming the Health Care Bill down their throats: watching Lindsay’s head asplode.
Those aren’t 10-15 Republican votes in Lindsay’s back pocket – that’s where he keeps his astroglide.
Happy Birthday Jim!
Now please produce your birth certificate so we can verify that it is your birthday.
Hey Jim, Eric Massa called and wants to know when you’re available for your birthday massage. He also wondered how warm you like your bath water.
[re=529520]Jim Newell[/re]: “For more than a year, healthcare has sucked”
For those of us who are older than our fresh-faced editor, it’s sucked for far longer than a year.
[re=529520]Jim Newell[/re]: But maybe when the Mexicans see the Republics are so fucking anxious to trade amnesty for hispanic drug lords in exchange for killing any hope of health care reform, they’ll see that all Republics are the enemy.
It’s your birthday? How old are you now–17?
Enjoy it. And from the post at the top of wonkette beginning with “The residential real estate market is back” you are especially inspired on your birthday. Your shit has been brilliant today, in a smart-alecky, foul-mouthed liberal kind of way.
[re=529717]Cape Clod[/re]: and be sure it’s the long-form birth certificate, OK?
Today, we are all Smart Alecks.
Oh good lord, just promise Lindsay a few hotties from Sabado GIgante’s Gaucho special and he’ll roll over like every gin infused South Carolinian hausfrau and throw his legs up in the air.
It is open knowledge in South Carolina that Senator Graham is a football batter. Is anyone ever going to post about that? I mean, shit.
[re=529548]Mr Blifil[/re]: I imagine Massa could be persuaded to do inflict this scene on Graham, and he would know exactly how to do it – in exchange for, say, future political rehabiliation, or a decent job – and get photos. Then Graham would agree to absolutely anything the Democrats put on the table. Then come back to Massa begging for more ….
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