Tom “The Sack” Vilsack has finally finished going through the Agriculture Department’s HR files, looking for some kind of job he could give to Breitbart victim Shirley Sherrod, to make everyone stop saying such mean things about him continuously. Obviously he couldn’t simply give her the old job back, as this is what’s known as a “lateral move” and it would look bad on her résumé, and obviously Vilsack cares for nothing more than the health of Sherrod’s career. What sort of job could he give her that would really be a step up … think, Sack-Man, think … wait! What if she were promoted to a gig where she fought the very racism that caused all this trouble in the first place? I’ll bet she’d love that!
Or, maybe not?
Sherrod, who spoke during several interviews Thursday morning, revealed that she was offered an outreach position that would deal with discrimination matters. But she said she’s not so keen on being the go-to person for those issues. “I would not want to be that individual that the department and everyone is looking to to solve the issue of racism at USDA. It takes a lot more to get that job done,” she said.
WHAT? Shirley, don’t you know this never would have happened if you hadn’t been an out-of-context racist? Now the burden is on you to solve racism for everyone forever. With great unasked-for media circuses come great responsibility!
“I haven’t seen the offer. … Before I say no totally, I would like to look at that.”
Ha ha, that’s right, Shirley, you hold out for more money. A lot more money. Minimum four weeks of vacation, too, and two days a week telecommuting. You can fight racism from home! Your Wonkette does it all the time!
Sherrod can of course be choosy about her next career move, as she also has an offer to tour with her buddy Willie Nelson. [Fox/HuffPo]
Read More:
- Andrew Breitbart Says Glenn Beck Helped Him With Shirley Sherrod Vid
- White House Absolutely Loved Shirley Sherrod Firing, Documents Show
- Vilsack Says He Tried Quitting, And That Immigrants Fondle Your Cheap Food
- Shirley Sherrod Displays Best Body Language Ever In Vilsack Press Conference
- Weepy Glenn Beck Can Be Your Wingman Anytime
{ 43 comments }
She should hold out for a fez, not a tiara.
The Sack should resign and let Obama appt Ms Sherrod as Secretary. Then the Sack can go back to propping up the cock of BigAg.
Shirley surely is winning the race to be Race Czar! Good on ya!
Everyone’s ignoring the real question: Did we make her go to the back of the bus before we threw her under it? The rest is piffle.
FREE SHIRLEY!
[re=623183]rafflesinc[/re]: Nothing to add. That would be the move.
As for the Obamites and the Fox/Breitbart crap, it’s like the old saying: Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, somebody’s gotta resign. Fool me thrice, and they’ll wind up being a special investigation leading to impeachment. Won’t that be ironic? The Republicans actually using the stupid way this got handled to pin something on the Kenyan Muslin?
Please take the job, Shirley, the Vile Sack needs you to pull him out of this vile sack he’s tumbled into.
Vilsack-o-shit.
She don’t need no stinkin’ Gubb’mint job, not when she can sue the fuck outta Britefart. KaChing, my sista, KaChing.
Today we are all holding out for a tiara.
Paranoid-delusional conspiracy theory: She’s holding out to sue the pants off, then back onto (because ugh, who wants to see that) Andy Dimfart. After all, it’s a lot harder to prove actual injury if you get a promotion out of the whole shitty episode.
She should totally take the Willie Nelson tour gig. There is nothing to add to this post.
Take it Shirley. It’s a sinecure. President Obama already cured us of racism. It would be like being offered a job as director of blimp traffic.
I don’t blame her one bit. Having been sacked because of a superior’s cockup, I’d make’em sweat a lot.
However, I didn’t have the leverage of a messy public sacking. Just got two days off (with pay.)
My sources tell me she’s holding out for the position of “sassy, folk-wise, matronly, black housekeeper” in Bristol and Levi’s reality show.
Fight racism from home everyday! Yeah!
Geeze, Vilsack must be the worst manager in the cabinet. Well maybe. First he fires someone based on hearing one side of the story as put out by a known delusional liar; second he thinks an accusation of racism makes someone qualified to work in race relations? I went to court to fight a ticket today, so does Vilsack think that qualifies me to be a policeman or a lawyer? Of course he probably thinks he got the USDA gig because he has a turnip for a brain, so that’s where his managerial approach comes from.
[re=623217]SayItWithWookies[/re]: Depends–did you prevail?
[re=623196]marioninnyc[/re]: Well, they did use against Clinton with great noise and effect Clinton’s response to an irrelevant line of questionining in a deposition in a bogus lawsuit drummed up and financed by right-wingers that was ultimately thrown out.
But, if an out-of-context racist can’t cure racism, who can?
Maybe an out and out racist? Glen Beck or Rush Limbaugh aren’t doing anything useful right now, are they?
Can we forget about her now and this stupid story created by some asshole reich wing video editor and move the fuck on please!
i fucking love shirley sherrod. she’s like a kurt vonnegut heroine come to life.
[re=623222]Tube City[/re]: And the investigation was done by a special prosecutor appointed to look into a fake scandal involving a perfectly legal land deal in which the Clintons’ lost money which the Republicans and media decided to claim involved some sort of vague wrongdoing. But the guy decided that gave him the power to try and dredge up any possible illegality he could find, or failing that, manufacture, which he did.
(ring, ring)
“Fox News. How may I direct your call?”
“Megyn Kelly, please.”
“Who shall I say is calling?”
“Breitbart. Andrew Breitbart.”
[click]
“Hello?…Hello?…”
He still has a future as a grifter. He and James O’Keefe could settle in to running sleazy blackmail schemes out of suburban Omaha motels. Eventually they could produce a series of educational films about prison, from inside, with titles like “Shower Etiquette: Don’t Drop The Soap!” and “Woodshop Is For Knick-knacks, Not Nasties”
Well, you see, Sherrod can’t fix racism because she is still the biggest racist this side of Thurgood Marshall, and because, in the evolving narrative, she actually got her original job in a sleazy affirmative action fraud deal. After all, she was one of the plaintiffs in a class action suit against the USDA, and we all know that whenever the blacks are compensated for their actual damages from discrimination, that’s actually discrimination, because only the blacks are racist now.
The problem with holding out for more money for a Federal position is that no Federal employee is supposed to earn more than the President. She needs to Google around and find out what Obama makes, then request a salary that is $1 less than his.
[re=623227]dex[/re]: Shirley Sherrod is literally Beatrice Rumfoord and we are all Unk.
[re=623221]Jim89048[/re]: Completely exonerated. Actually, I should be on the Supreme Court for that.
Shirley says, “Surely you jest.”
[re=623217]SayItWithWookies[/re]: I don’t know about “worst”, but his level of spinelessness would make you think he should be regulating jellyfish, not farmers.
[re=623250]SayItWithWookies[/re]: Are you sure that’s beyond refutiation?
Barry: Surely, you can find an appropriate job for this nice lady?
Vile Sack: How about the William T. Sherman memorial czarina for rubbing the crackers noses in it? And stop calling me Shirley!
You know, I really wish someone out there had a copy of the ads run by Vilsack’s 1998 opponent for governor of Iowa right now.
For those who missed this epic campaign (in 1998! for governor! of Iowa!), Jim Ross Lightfoot was the heir apparent to Iowa’s incumbent governor; Vilsack was the scrappy challenger. As polls started going in Vilsack’s favor, Lightfoot’s TV ads became increasingly hilarious. Finally, he ran one about how, as a state rep or whatever, Vilsack had voted for a bill that would allow TOTALLY NUDE DANCING in IOWA NEIGHBORHOODS.
Everyone then voted for Vilsack, because who doesn’t want totally nude dancing in Iowa neighborhoods? No one, that’s who.
So to this day, no matter what Vilsack ends up in the news for, I wonder when all that dancing is going to start happening.
[re=623217]SayItWithWookies[/re]: On the other hand, being a lawyer doesn’t necessarily qualify one to go to court. See Nixon, Richard; Gonzales, Alberto; Taitz, Orly.
[re=623261]Johnny Zhivago[/re]: He thinks the only entity that is not racist is Monsanto.
Sue, Shirley, sue. And give my best to Willie. Seriously, what effing change is this that Vilesack can only think to give her the same old PR face-of-anti-racism make-work slot. Establishment douches have been doing this since 1970. Barf.
Shirley should go on tour with baseball and racial healing legend, Clambake.
[re=623250]SayItWithWookies[/re]: Excellent! Next time I’m caught doing 160 in a school zone, I’ll look you up.
[re=623364]user-of-owls[/re]: Oh, god, no–just imagine what Breitbart would say when he found out that the “loveable old codger” LIED about playing in the Negro Leagues.
Andrew Breitbart, Press Secretary for President Palin.
Fuck me. Didn’t she have a real job before? Like, I dunno, helping small farmers or something? And hadn’t she been doing stuff like that for her whole career? You know, actually helping people?
Why the fuck would she want a fucking made-up PR job? Did Vilesack think she was the chocolate version of Sarah Palin?
That said, if they put enough sugar on it, go get it. All us olders got to grab retirement where it raises its head.
Chimpeach!
[re=623722]Enslave the Whales[/re]: Did Vilesack think she was the chocolate version of Sarah Palin?
Yes, that is exactly how she is seen. Not just by Vilesucks, either.
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