How Is Trey Gowdy Fucking The Republic Today?

Maybe it would be easier to ask how he's NOT fucking the republic.

After Trump-loving super-moron Devin Nunes "recused" himself (he really didn't ) from the House Intelligence Committee's investigation into connections between Donald Trump's campaign and Russia, we were supposed to believe the new GOP leadership, under Rep. Mike Conaway, was going to act growned up and patriotic and work with Democrats to get to the bottom of one of the most important questions our nation has ever faced, namely whether the sitting president and/or his people colluded with a hostile foreign power to steal the Oval Office. That has not happened. Instead, moron Republicans on the committee, actually led in everything but name by Rep. Trey Gowdy (R- Benghazi ), have turned their efforts to trying to smear the very existence of the Steele Dossier, the collection of raw intelligence compiled by British spy Christopher Steele.

In that spirit, Gowdy and his fellow Republicans on the committee have sent subpoenas to the FBI and the Justice Department, because ... wait, what? No, for real, what the fuck is Gowdy up to here? The story was broken by the  Washington Examiner,  because that's where wingnut propaganda stories break, we guess:

In the most significant escalation yet in the wrangling between Congress and the FBI over the Trump dossier, the House Intelligence Committee has subpoenaed the bureau and the Justice Department for documents relating to the dossier, the FBI's relationship with dossier author Christopher Steele, and the bureau's possible role in supporting what began as an opposition research project against candidate Donald Trump in the final months of last year's presidential campaign.

The subpoenas are an indication of growing frustration inside the committee over the FBI and Justice Department's lack of cooperation in the Trump-Russia investigation.

Hahaha, let us translate from Washington Examiner into normal human reality-based English! Trey Gowdy and Devin Nunes (who again, is not really "recused," especially considering how two of his buttboys showed up at Christopher Steele's lawyer's office in the UK this summer, for "reason") are really pissed off that the FBI and the Justice Department -- i.e. the monstrous "Deep State" of Americans who actually love America instead of flip-topping their throats open for Donald Trump's dick, like Gowdy and Nunes do -- are actually focused on the Trump-Russia investigation, as opposed to doing Trump's bidding by investigating "leaks" and "wire tapps" and the REAL Trump-Russia conspiracy, which is that the Democrats concocted the Trump-Russia conspiracy in order for Hillary Clinton to steal the election FROM HERSELF, and that Fusion GPS, the intelligence firm that originally hired Steele, also had a Russian client one time, which must mean ALL THE FIRM'S WORK is for the Russians.

It just makes sense, as long as wingnut conspiracy raccoons live inside your brain and are fucking each other right now.

If you'll remember, Senator Chuck Grassley, whose sexually active brain raccoons are named Fran and Gunther, has been leading his own similar effort in the Senate Intelligence Committee, putting the dossier on trial, instead of actually trying to do a Trump-Russia investigation.

For those who need it, here is a quick recap on what actually   happened last year with the creation of the dossier:  Last summer, a "Republican client" contracted with Steele to do run-of-the-mill oppo research on Donald Trump. After Trump got the nomination, the spy's work continued, paid by somebody "allied with Democrats." But then he started finding "HOLY SHIT!" connections between Trump and the Russians, to the point that he wasn't just working for his client anymore. In fact, his findings freaked him out so much that he thought the FBI needed to see what he was seeing. And class, do we remember who ultimately handed then-FBI Director James Comey what is now known as the Steele Dossier? DING DING DING,it was John McCain! 

Now, that's pretty simple as spy narratives go, but it's still too difficult for Trey Gowdy's Foghorn Leghorn ass to understand, so he still is full of #confuse:

Like investigators with the Senate Judiciary Committee, who are also pursuing information about the dossier, the House committee wants to know the origin of the FBI's involvement in the creation of the document. They are particularly interested to know whether the FBI or Justice Department ever presented information from the dossier -- unverified, possibly from paid informants -- to a court as a basis for obtaining a surveillance warrant in the Russia investigation.

The FBI's involvement in ... the creation of the dossier? But we literally just explained that  McCain gave them the ... oh fuck it.

"I want to know the extent to which it was relied upon, if at all, by any of our intelligence agencies or federal law enforcement agencies," Gowdy said, "and to the extent it was relied upon, how did they vet, or either corroborate or contradict, the information in it?"

Perhaps somebody can sit Gowdy's dumb ass down and affix a helmet to his head (for his own protection, because stupid people need helmets) and explain that yes, the FBI has used the dossier of raw intelligence, to investigate and verify its claims, and in some cases to debunk them, because THAT'S WHAT YOU DO WITH RAW INTELLIGENCE, YOU GODDAMNED HAYSEED ASSFUCK.

So far, the FBI and Justice Department have told Gowdy's subpoenas to pound sand, so Gowdy has extended their deadline to September 14, which gives the FBI and Justice eight more days to continue telling Gowdy to eat shit.

We are enraged and need more coffee right now, so let's just agree that we've answered the question of how Trey Gowdy is fucking the American republic right now. He's always doing it in some way or another.

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[ Washington Examiner ]