Alabama GOP Senate Candidate Roy Moore Only Molested One Little Girl, Allegedly

This does kind of sound like him.

OHHHHHHHHHH SHIT. The forces of Satan are out and about, and they are trying to destroy the Alabama Senate campaign of God's perfect Republican angel Roy Moore! That is surely the only explanation for why the  Washington Post  reports that Roy Moore, who has perfect morals and knows God really hates fags, allegedly molested a little 14 year-old-girl when he was 32:

Leigh Corfman says she was 14 years old when an older man approached her outside a courtroom in Etowah County, Ala. She was sitting on a wooden bench with her mother, they both recall, when the man introduced himself as Roy Moore.

It was early 1979 and Moore — now the Republican nominee in Alabama for a U.S. Senate seat — was a 32-year-old assistant district attorney. He struck up a conversation, Corfman and her mother say, and offered to watch the girl while her mother went inside for a child custody hearing.

Her mother, Nancy Wells, thought he was just being nice. But it sounds like maybe Roy Moore was being the opposite of nice, unless he had recently read in the Bible that some little girls in those days got married at age 10, and it made him feel pervy tingles in his Down Theres, secure in the belief God approved of his actions:

Alone with Corfman, Moore chatted with her and asked for her phone number, she says. Days later, she says, he picked her up around the corner from her house in Gadsden, drove her about 30 minutes to his home in the woods, told her how pretty she was and kissed her. On a second visit, she says, he took off her shirt and pants and removed his clothes. He touched her over her bra and underpants, she says, and guided her hand to touch him over his underwear.

Clearly this is the man God has chosen to shepherd Alabama toward a more righteous future.

WaPo talked to three (3) other women who also say Moore "pursued them when they were between the ages of 16 and 18 and he was in his early 30s," but those cases are simply creepy and do not rise to the level of sexual assault.

Of course, Moore is firing back, saying the evil forces of darkness (Democrats and WaPo, of course) are just lying to attack his reputation, which was very godly to begin with. Besides, Moore says, if he had really done this nasty thing, wouldn't it have come out during an earlier campaign? Corfman, who according to WaPo is a Republican Trump voter, explains why it didn't:

She says she thought of confronting Moore personally for years, and almost came forward publicly during his first campaign for state Supreme Court in 2000, but decided against it. Her two children were still in school then and she worried about how it would affect them. She also was concerned that her background — three divorces and a messy financial history — might undermine her credibility. [...]

“I have prayed over this,” Corfman says, explaining why she decided to tell her story now. “All I know is that I can’t sit back and let this continue, let him continue without the mask being removed.”

Fair enough to us! Roy Moore is cordinally invited to go fuck himself for even suggesting that this woman needs to explain why she didn't come forward to tell the world about Roy Moore's Alleged Stranger Danger Bad Touches until now.

WaPo, which has Corfman's full, detailed account, points out that at the time, the age of consent in Alabama was 16, so please, Baby Boomers, do not get up on Wonkette's dick about how things were different in the olden timey days. If these allegations are true, Moore sexually assaulted a minor child.

Let's look at Twitter for a couple reactions to this news about a gay-hatin' Bible-beating wingnut being (allegedly) a kid-touching perv:

The answers to the questions posed in those tweets are 1) sure seems like a metric fuckton of them are! and 2) literally nobody is surprised by this news.

 Breitbart published a story before WaPo did, revealing that the liberal agenda fake news rag was planning to do this lying hit piece. Steve Bannon's "alt-right" mouthpiece features Moore's feverish denials and points out that he has been gay-married to his wife Kayla for 33 years. It does include the allegations, but then immediately PROVES bitches be lyin', because here is why:

The Post is owned by Nash Holdings LLC, a holding company for billionaire Amazon founder and open borders champion Jeffrey Bezos.

The newspaper formally endorsed Moore’s Democratic opponent Doug Jones in the senate race.

In a series of articles, Breitbart News has documented Jones’s close associations with far-left groups financed by George Soros that push open borders and a host of radical causes.

Fuck you, Breitbart.

Hey, Alabama, remember that nice Democrat Doug Jones, the guy who's running against Moore? Jones is a civil rights lawyer who prosecuted KKK members for bombing a black church in Birmingham in 1963, which is a very different record from Moore's, which includes thinking he speaks for God, refusing to abide by the Supreme Court decision granting marriage equality to gays and lesbians, and now, allegedly, taking a 14-year-old girl to his house and making her rub his hard dick. Maybe that's the real reason Moore is scared to debate Jones. 

The choice is yours, Alabama, but if you'd like to donate to Jones's campaign, click this clicky. 

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[ Washington Post ]