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Liar, Liar. Wonkagenda For Wednesday, Sept., 18, 2019

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Morning Wonketariat! Here's some of the things we may be talking about today.


Trump's slap happy boot licker Corey Lewandowski brought his made-for-TV shit show to the Hill for Democrats' first "impeachment hearing." If, like us, you watched until your liver demanded a good pickling, Lewandowski and Republicans' farcical water carrying isn't a surprise. Once Barry Berke, legal counsel for the House Judiciary Committee, took over the questioning, we were treated to a remarkable moment where Lewandowski admitted he's a goddamn liar who should have called the FBI about Russian fuckery in the 2016 election, and that he Trump told him to lean on Jeff Sessions during Robert Mueller's probe into said Russian fuckery. [Morning Maddow]

Combative Corey Lewandowski Begrudgingly Affirms Mueller Report's Truth | Rachel Maddow | MSNBC www.youtube.com

A new Politico/Morning Consult poll shows House Democrats have rallied radical lefties to #IMPEACH the mother fucker, but they've still got a long way to go if they're ever going to get flyover country to come to their senses. The divide on impeachment is most evident in the rift between House Speaker Nancy Pelosi and Judiciary chair Jerry Nadler. Pelosi is concerned with the raw politics of protecting vulnerable Democrats in 2020, but Nadler knows we need to do SOMETHING about Trump's ALLEGED high crimes and misdemeanors. [Data for Nerds]

The Office of the Director of National Intelligence doesn't want to hand over info to the House Permanent Select Committee on Intelligence about a whistleblower complaint to the DNI's inspector general. Republican Rep. Devin Nunes mooed that the complaint wasn't "urgent" because it had nothing to do with the agency itself. Acting DNI head Joseph Maguire is already blowing off a congressional hearing on the issue, prompting Rep. Adam Schiff to threaten to slap Maguire with a subpoena.

Members of the House Intel Committee voted to release thousands of pages of transcripts from the half-assed Republican-led Trump-Russia probe last year. The Daily Caller was the only one reporting this story at deadline this morning, but their write up is littered with doublespeak, so there's no link.

The administration's latest attempt to appease corporate slimeballs involved the administration arguing before the Supreme Court that the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau is unconstitutional because it tied Trump's tiny hands from "You're Fired"-ing the agency's director.

Democrats are hoping to avoid another government shutdown at the end of the month, but it's unclear whether or not that will happen. Yesterday Nancy Pelosi agreed to fund bailouts for farmers being fucked by Trump's trade war, but a number of other issues remain. Concern over the Republican raid on health and education programs for Trump's goddamn wall will likely stymie a procedural vote on Pentagon funding today, making it increasingly likely Congress will just kick the can down the road with a stop-gap funding bill (again).

The Trump administration is burning Gadsden flags with its plan to revoke California's ability to create its own emissions standards by saying the federal government's authority supersedes that of the states. NO STEP ON SNEK!

In the eyes of Donald Trump, homeless people have declared war on Los Angeles and San Francisco. Trump's plan to keep all the poors from lowering property values with their public defecation is still a secret, but he's flying around California begging super rich closet conservatives for money.

Republicans are a little worried the NRA won't be able to help them hump guns all the way to election day due to its own civil war.

Post-mortem polls from last week's debate are starting to roll in today, and the main takeaway is that things look REALLY good for Sen. Elizabeth Warren right now. Steve Kornacki is geeking out over the popularity of candidates among certain demographics, and Dave Weigel notes voter trends echo data from earlier this summer. In addition to all that, the math nerds over at 538 have a wonky analysis on what voters seem to care about right now. [NBC News/WSJ Poll]

Politico reports that Trump's 2020 campaign is having trouble locking down suburbanites in Wisconsin thanks to a less than surprising combination of factory closures, Never Trumpers abandoning the Republican party, and a highly energized Democratic voter base. On top of that, new polling shows Republicans in jeopardy of losing Arizona up and down the ticket. Election day is still 412 days away, so don't get complacent!

The Daily Show's Trevor Noah compared Sen. Elizabeth Warren's massive rally in New York the other day with Trump's rally in New Mexico. Yes, Trump called one of his "Hispanics" a "WASP."

Warren and Trump's Dueling Campaign Rallies | The Daily Show www.youtube.com

DINO Rep. Dan Lipinski is throwing a tantrum (again) after Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez endorsed his primary opponent, Marie Newman. Lipinski, the most conservative Democrat in the House, calls Newman an "extremist candidate" because of her support for legal abortion.

Protect Our Care, a Democratic-aligned group focused on health care, will launch a $2 million ad campaign to help 10 Democratic freshmen who may be vulnerable in 2020. Roll Call reports the group is trying to get out ahead of GOP attack ads that will inevitably call Democrats godless gaymo-sexual communists who are coming for your guns.

Pete Buttigieg scored the endorsement of almost 60 current and former mayors this morning. Mayors Steve Adler, Christopher Cabaldon, Nan Whaley and Sly James penned an op-ed in USA Today calling him a role model and mentor. If y'all love Mayor Pete so much, why don't y'all you gay marry him?

DC Mayor Muriel Bowser and Del. Eleanor Holmes Norton are pushing DC statehood ahead of a House Oversight hearing on the issue tomorrow. NO TAXATION WITHOUT REPRESENTATION!

Israeli elections are still too close to call, putting the future of INDICTED Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu in limbo. Political kingmakers have refused to back either of Israel's two main political parties, led by Bibi's ultra-conservatives, and his centrist rival, Benny Gantz, potentially setting up a bevy of negotiations in dark, smoky rooms in order to form a coalition government. Or maybe nobody smokes in those dark rooms anymore.

Facebook's new Supreme Court will have the ability to override the decisions of Mark Zuckerberg -- as if they would rule against their boy-king.

Aaron Rupar 'splains how Fox News talking heads have been desperate to spin Justice Brett Kavanaugh's cock chronicles as another hatchet job against a rich, beer-loving yuppie with an abundance of white male privilege.

Abortion rates continued their long, downward trend, according to a new data released by the Guttmacher Institute. It's unclear WHY abortion rates are falling as they've ticked down in almost every state since 2017. It should be noted the data doesn't include recent abortion restrictions in states like Texas or Ohio, the closure of abortion clinics throughout flyover country, the effectiveness in preventative birth control measures, nor does it factor in the decline in overall birthrates across the country.

We are full of sads to report the passing of Mary Martha Corinne Morrison Claiborne Roberts, more commonly known as NPR's Cokie Roberts, after complications with breast cancer. America's manbaby in chief and a cadre of forgettable conservative talking heads are already saying awful things about Roberts, a journalism legend who stomped a trail into Capital Hill that is still followed by women today, but the clowns have been muted by an outpouring of condolences, and colleagues sharing memories. An obit from the New York Times recalls how Roberts got started in the old white man's world of news back in the 1960s, and the Washington Post has a good piece about the 1972 disappearance of Roberts's father, then-House Majority Leader Hale Boggs. Yesterday Roberts' fellow NPR colleague, Nina Totenberg, penned a touching memorial calling Roberts "the personification of human decency." Cokie Roberts was 75, and leaves behind her husband, two children, and six grandchildren.

Last night Stephen Colbert sat down with Sen. Elizabeth Warren to talk some shit about Trump, her plans to fix all the broken things, and her four hour selfie line the other day.

Elizabeth Warren: A Country That Elects Donald Trump Is Already In Trouble www.youtube.com


And here's your morning Nice Time: BABY CEPHALOPODS

Baby Cephalopods' First Moments www.youtube.com


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Dominic Gwinn

Dominic is a broke journalist in Chicago. You can find him in a dirty bar talking to weirdos, or in a gutter taking photos.

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