Republicans Consider Thinking About Growing A Conscience. Wonkagenda For Tues., Oct. 8, 2019

Republicans Consider Thinking About Growing A Conscience. Wonkagenda For Tues., Oct. 8, 2019

Morning Wonketariat! Here's some of the things we may be talking about today.

Republicans revolted en masse yesterday after the administration announced US troops would be pulled from the Syrian-Turkish border. Politico details how gobsmacked national security leaders and Republicans led by Senator Lindsey Graham and Majority Leader Mitch McConnell joined Democrats in putting their foot down. In response, our God-Emperor, in his self-described "unmatched wisdom," decided to hold off (again). Naturally, Lou Dobbs demanded Republicans apologize for hurting Trump's delicate constitution, and wept with Corey Lewandowski about globalist RINOs leading Trump off the primrose path.

NBC gossips that Turkish President Recep Tayyip Erdogan was pissed he didn't get any special treatment when he and Trump were both in New York for the UN General Assembly meeting last week, and a call was set up to keep both precious snowflakes from melting. During the call Erdogan threatened to invade Kurdish camps (again) and Trump caved, prompting Mick Mulvaney -- who was listening in -- to make a panicked phone call to Defense Secretary Mark Esper to let him know Trump was about to stick his toad penis in a hornets' nest.

BONUS: The Washington Post reports the Kurds are fed up with a century of wishy-washy support from the West, and are terrified of being slaughtered by not only Turkey but Russian- and Iranian-backed Syrian troops the next time Trump takes a phone call.

Former National Security Advisor Ambassador Susan Rice sat down with Stephen Colbert last night and said Trump is "batshit crazy" to stab the Kurds in the back.

Susan Rice: Pulling U.S. Troops From Northern Syria Is "Bat**** Crazy"

This morning a new Washington Post-Schar School poll shows 58 percent of Americans support the House Democrats' impeachment inquiry. Additionally, 49 percent say the House should go ahead and #IMPEACH the motherfucker. [Poll]

The administration's self-immolation on Ukrainium One has Republicans and Trump World on edge seeing as how The Boss has admitted he crimed on national television and his only defense is to shove all his scandals into the same Russian nesting doll.

House Democrats are mulling over a number of steps to protect the identity of the second whistleblower, including masking their face and voice. Later today, the House Intel Committee WON'T grill the super rich US Ambassador to the EU Gordon Sondland, who is "disappointed" according to his lawyer that the administration has ordered him not to appear.

The Washington Post reports Foggy Bottom is full of depressed saps under Secretary of State Mike Pompeo. Career foreign service officers are pissed Pompeo is letting Rudy Giuliani run around the world chasing DEEP STATE conspiracy theories like a drunk, geriatric Carmen Sandiego.

The LA Times gossips that House Republicans are scheming to use a seemingly inevitable impeachment inquiry as a way of feeding their Ukrainium fever dreams. Since there's no official impeachment inquiry (yet), Republicans, as the minority party, technically can't subpoena Joe Biden for his Benghazi emails. In addition, House rules require the Speaker to grant ranking members the ability to issue subpoenas, and it's unlikely that Nancy Pelosi will let Devin Nunes make any more midnight moooves all over Washington (again).

Gabe Sherman gossips that Never Trump Republicans see Utah Republican Sen. Mitt Romney as their own personal Obi-Wan Kenobi. According to the usual cadre of unnamed officials, Romney has the power to drag moderate Republicans who are usually too chickenshit to weather a tweetstorm over the line on impeachment, and "the things he's saying are freaking Republicans out."

CNN has a live tracker of what Republicans AREN'T saying about Trump's debunked Ukrainium One scheme. A laughable majority of congressional Republicans are dodging reporters, while half a dozen desperately try to change the subject whenever they're gabbing with other TV talking heads.

(Acting) DHS head Kevin McAleenan walked off a stage at Georgetown University in shame after students and activists began protesting during his keynote address to the school's Migration Policy Institute. [Video]

Some racists are crying that Mar-a-Lago "caved to the Left's bullying tactics" in canceling an event planned by an anti-Muslim group. Sad.

Early this morning Joe Biden released his secondary education plan. The campaign says Biden wants a massive investment in community colleges, including offering two years of free community college education.

Sen. Bernie Sanders has dropped a plan to tackle corporate lobbying to the 2020 Democratic National Convention. After bragging about small dollar donations, the plan calls for a ban on corporate contributions to inaugural events, and capping donations at $500. [Plan]

South Bend Mayor Pete Buttigieg has a new plan to reduce the cost of prescription drugs. Mayor Pete's plan echoes similar proposals by Senators Kamala Harris and Bernie Sanders in capping out-of-pocket drug costs, and slapping big pharma with steep fines for jacking up drug prices. The plan calls for the federal government to negotiate drug prices based on their therapeutic benefit, the cost to bring them to market, the costs of treatment, and their price overseas. [Plan]

Sen. Kamala Harris has a new paid family leave plan that would see every worker receive six months of paid family and medical leave. Anyone making under $75,000 would get a full wage replacement under what Harris calls her "Children's Agenda." Harris's plan aims to curb child poverty by 50 percent in her first term by creating a federal inter-agency working group, and increasing the availability of nutritional assistance and tax credits for people with kids. [Plan]

ICYMI: The Miami Herald has smuggled footage from inside the crumbling Martin Correctional Institution in Florida. The footage shows widespread drug abuse, guards' apathy towards inmates' health and safety, squalor-like living conditions, and the fallout of Hurricane Irma. [Clip]

#behindthebarbedwire filmed by INMATES FILM at MARTIN C.I. in

Politico has a doozy on the administration's obsession with polygraph tests.

The Daily Beast stumbled across an arch-conservative shitposting group on Facebook owned by Real Clear Politics. The group peddles all the usual pro-Trump memes, and appears to be a clickbait scheme to drive traffic back to RCP's other sites.

The Chinese government was VERY butthurt after last week's episode of South Park poked fun at the state's uncompromising censorship and the douchebags who allow their art to be compromised, ordering the show scrubbed off the Chinese internet. Show creators Trey Parker and Matt Stone responded on Twitter, "Like the NBA, we welcome Chinese censors into our homes and into our hearts. We too love money more than freedom and democracy. Xi doesn't look just like Winnie the Pooh at all." [Clip]

The Return of Fingerbang - "Band in China" - s23e02 - South

And here's your morning Nice Time: IT'S TOPI!


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Dominic Gwinn

Dominic is a broke journalist in Chicago. You can find him in a dirty bar talking to weirdos, or in a gutter taking photos.


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