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Happy Kwanzaa and Boxing Day, Wonketariat! We'll be slow-posting with both Evan and Dok out, so just consider it "artisanal." Here's some of the things we may be talking about today.


Because he seems to be devoid of a soul, Trump questioned a seven-year-old girl's belief in Santa Claus on Christmas Eve, saying that it was "marginal" for her to believe a magical fat man can singlehandedly save the world by scaring people into being good, for goodness sake.

Trump cheerfully called America a "disgrace" on Christmas. The mad king then continued to hold the country hostage by demanding someone pay for his damn wall. Trump then criticized the Fed (again), and said of the falling stock market, "I think it's a tremendous opportunity to buy." Trump also criticized House Democrats for "presidential harassment," and flailed and railed about James Comey.

With Trump refusing to take up any negotiations to reopen the government unless he gets WALL, Politico reports many congressional legislators are bracing for a government shutdown that could last well into the New Year, with Sen. Pat Roberts advising legislators to "hunker down like a jackass in a hailstorm and just take it."

Fact Check: Over the last several days, Trump has claimed that his administration is building a border wall, or a fence, "or whatever you want to call it," however the New York Times has a decent infographic on existing border measures.

An eight-year-old Guatemalan boy detained by CBP died in a New Mexico hospital on Christmas Eve. It's unknown what caused the boy's death, but CBP reports the boy was initially diagnosed with a common cold at an area hospital, remanded back into CBP custody, then readmitted to the hospital several hours later. :(

Democrats are already targeting Martha McSally in 2020 with a number of candidates, including astronaut Mark Kelly, a turncoat Republican, and several House reps who are already sniping at each other in the press.

Judd Legum reports the ongoing election fuckery in the North Carolina 9th was so bad that the sleazeball at the center of it all, Leslie McCrae Dowless, bragged about a "a new trick" where he was throwing absentee ballots in the trash. Legum reports that the county Board of Elections was working in cahoots with Dowless. According to sworn affidavits, Dowless was allowed to copy absentee ballot request forms, and abused open records laws to gain access to data that allowed him to target black voters.

A former Florida sheriff's deputy who was rehired as a school resource officer killed his family before turning a gun on himself in front of the local high school. Tragically, his six-year-old granddaughter, wife, and daughter didn't have guns to defend themselves.

Chicago has canceled its 2019 Women's March citing a lack of volunteers and high costs. The cancelation comes as the group's national leaders face charges of anti-semitism for praising Louis Farrakhan (among other things). This is why we can't have nice things!

It's not just the US: Global markets are in a free fall and analysts are worried they could continue to fall well into the New Year as production slows throughout the Americas, Europe and Asia. This morning the WSJ reports US farmers can expect even more losses after the new TPP kicks into gear and lowers trade duties for 11 of the US's largest competitors throughout the Pacific, including Japan, Canada, Australia, New Zealand, and Chile.

The New York Times seems to have dug up the podiatrist who diagnosed Trump with "bone spurs." Records show that the Queens-based doctor had Fred Trump as a landlord, and would often brag about a quid-pro-quo agreement. HHMMMM!

The Christmas story Trump and Pence heard at the National Cathedral was all about Jesus being a refugee and migrant child fleeing from dictator. WaPo reports the sermon was written long before the First and Second families suddenly decided to go to the progressive, anti-gun and LGBTQ-friendly house of worship.

And here's your morning Nice Time! X-Mas RATS!

Rats Get A Christmas Treat! | Cities: Nature's New Wild | BBC Earth www.youtube.com

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Dominic Gwinn

Dominic is a broke journalist in Chicago. You can find him in a dirty bar talking to weirdos, or lying in a gutter taking photos.

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Can we just say that when Fox idiot Maria Bartiromo sounds like the sane person in a situation, that is a worrisome situation? That is what happened when Donald Trump -- who's just had a fantastic Infrastructure Week, assuming it is Infrastructure Week, and we always do -- sat down for what was supposed to be an easy breezy "You're the best!"/"No YOU are, Mister President!" interview with his beloved Fox pals.

Instead Maria Bartiromo had to ask the question on everybody's mind, which is WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU OH MY GOD, or, more clearly, is there a reason you have spent this entire week of your presidency picking a fight with a dead guy, who somehow seems to be winning that fight, because you are literally so stupid and incompetent you LOSE FIGHTS TO DEAD GUYS?

She said it nicer than that, though.

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Last fall, after Wisconsin voters rejected Gov. Scott Walker's reelection bid and chose Democrat Tony Evers instead, Republicans in the state legislature got very busy doing anything they could to limit the power of the incoming governor and the new Democratic attorney general, Josh Kaul. Hey, voters may have chosen Evers, but that didn't mean Rs had to let Democrats actually govern, now did it? As Republican state House Speaker Robin Vos rather notoriously said at the time, the lege had to act because "We are going to have a very liberal governor who is going to enact policies that are in direct contrast to what many of us believe in." So in a two day "extraordinary session," the Republicans shifted power from the executive branch and gave those powers to the legislature, which conveniently remained in Republican control thanks to gerrymandering. Scott Walker signed the bills and then began his career as an idiot on Twitter.

Yesterday, a Wisconsin judge found the entire lame duck session violated the state constitution, and invalidated the laws it passed. Dane County Circuit Judge Richard Niess said in his decision the Wisconsin constitution is quite specific about when the legislature can meet, and nope, the "extraordinary session" didn't meet the constitutional requirements, so sorry guys, you didn't follow the rules and your laws ARE MOOT.

The Associated Press lawsplains the constitutional neener-neener:

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