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*HEY, YOU KNEW WHAT YOU WERE GETTING INTO:* It's the one day every four years that Floridians vote in primaries, and by tradition this means that voters are reporting "technical glitches" with voting machines. We hear that one of these complainers, that was actually not a human but a famous blimp, said that when it tried to vote for Ron Paul, the machine's robotic Fascist-arms stuffed it in a black burlap sack and threw it to the bottom of Lake Okeechobee. [Orlando Sentinel]

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The great journalists at the National Enquirer regularly sent advance digital copies of stories about Donald Trump and his political opponents to Michael Cohen, according to a story in the Washington Post, which cited "three people with knowledge of the matter" as sources. Probably Trump was one of them, you know how he is.

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Times have been tough for those Trump supporters who are fine with his rampant bigotry but are discovering he's going to screw them like any number of non-wife-like women he totally swears he's never met.

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