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This year, like every year since people started being born, a lot of people died. It has gotten so bad for famous folks since 2016 that we are already sick of people saying "saw (fill in the blank) trending, didn't know if they were dead or a pervert." But yeah, that happens a lot, so here is a list of folks who are in fact deceased, and only a few of them were also rumored to be that other thing.


Happily, some notable people are still not dead, but if anyone makes one of those Keith Richards jokes, you are automatically banned. Haha, just kidding I can't do that, but for real, be more creative! And hold on tight Betty White, we love you.

Anyway, here is a list of some of the people we could think of who were both famous and then dead in 2017 -- including mostly a LOT of musician types, and a whole lot of men. It appears that those who did not die at 27 years old have started falling off at a rapid pace. Hopefully an important person has been left off this list so that you can be righteously indignant that they were forgotten, like how people do about the Oscars. Please yell about it in the comments.

HAPPY NEW YEAR! Can't wait to see who dies next.

Mary Tyler Moore. You know who she is. One of the first women to have a show about having a career instead of a husband or family. It is sad that she has died. We must now hold on to Marlo Thomas that much tighter.

Chris Cornell. Terrible. Suicide is always terrible and I like to think he was doing autoerotic and it got out of hand. Amazing singer, a part of every grunge band there ever was, especially Soundgarden, Temple of the Dog, Audioslave.

Tom Petty. Still verklempt about this one. Talk amongst yourselves. Tom Petty is one of those people that when you start trying to listen to all of his music you love it takes like 6 hours and a whole bottle of bourbon. American Girl in Silence of the Lambs is one of the creepiest soundtrack usages ever.

Gregg Allman. Macon, Georgia's Allman family's second best musician (fight me). Gregg managed to outlive his brother Duane by 46 years simply by staying off a motorcycle, but still doing all the drugs, and getting married SEVEN times til his liver finally gave out.

David Cassidy. Glad it wasn't Shaun, but a lot of people loved the Partridge Family, and this guy in particular, a real lot.

Mel Tillis. He was famous in the '70s for having a severe stutter, and singing country songs some people actually really liked.

Jerry Lewis. SUPER famous, did a lot of good charity work for kids, member of the Rat Pack, and it's weird how much Milo Yiannopoulos looks like him (seriously, no?).

Glenn Campbell. Sang a song about working for the power company that was pretty famous in the '70s, and also this one. Really good at drinking.

Pat DiNizio. Honestly did not know this guy was dead til I started doing this list. But who doesn't love the Smithereens? Pat DiNizio became some sort of New Jersey politician as well, which is odd. Their '88 show at Jacksonville State was fantastic.

Jim Nabors. Gomer Pyle was from Alabama, had a crazy, fairly high pitched, country speaking voice and beautiful baritone singing voice. Married his husband in 2013, just about as soon as it was legal, after having been with the man for 38 years.

Fats Domino. Sold more than 65 MILLION records. One of the first Rock and Roll Hall of Famers, also had terrible anxiety.

Robert Guillaume. Benson. He was also the mayor on Seems like Old Times with Goldie Hawn, ever seen that one?

Ralphie May. Big time comedian.

Harry Dean Stanton. Quite a prolific actor, but come on, he's gonna be Andie's sad dad from Pretty in Pink forever.

Frank Vincent. Most of the Italian movies and TV shows you have ever seen including Raging Bull, The Sopranos, Casino, and Goodfellas, where he was stabbed in a trunk with some of the best sound effects ever

Sam Shepard. That hot guy who played Chuck Yeager on The Right Stuff, was also a well regarded, multiple award winning playwright. He also dated both Patti Smith, and lived with our forever hero Jessica Lange for more than 3 decades and they had kids together.

Rose Marie. She made a black hair bow iconic, Dick Van Dyke more funny, and also became very twitter famous in her 90s.

Adam West. Oh no, the Mayor from Family Guy, said millennials everywhere as I scream BATMAN and slap them repeatedly.

Bill Paxton (not Pullman, which will never not be confusing). But still, first and foremost he was Chet from Weird Science and he also did that Tornado movie with Helen Hunt, and a bunch of other things, while definitely not being Bill Pullman.

Hugh Hefner. He probably lived long enough, what the hell else did he have left to do?

Della Reese. Touched by an Angel, sure, but mostly MY PINKY TOE! This lady more than held her own against Redd Foxx, Richard Pryor, Eddie AND Charlie Murphy.

Charlie Murphy. Responsible for one of the most iconic moments of teevee in the '00s. Made Rick "Habitual line stepper" James famous again until he too died sometime after this video.

Chuck Berry (literally thought he had been dead way before now, seriously what happened? Y'all think he really watched people pee? Also SPY magazine ruled so hard). Anyway, Chuck did some terrible stuff in his personal life, but also wrote some great songs and inspired a lot of other great musicians, and now he is dead.

Malcolm Young. Angus's brother and co-founding member of AC/DC. These guys are the most fun to drive way too fast in a 1983 Honda Civic hatchback and yell-sing along to. If you haven't done that, I highly recommend it.

That's all that I can think of now, but, if you know of anyone else who died harder than American exceptionalism in 2017, remind us!

Also, you should definitely donate to wonkette in one of these people's names.

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Robbin Young. Fair use so we can all see the boob picture she sent to her 12 true loves.

Robbin Young starred in the Roger Moore masterpiece For Your Eyes Only as the seventh female lead, "Girl in Flower Shop." She also starred in a bunch of Playboys, and the DM's of a humble Romanian hacker who stole her heart. But he was not a humble Romanian hacker, he was 12 Russian military intelligence officers in a trench coat. And now Young has shared those DMs and pictures of her buzzies with the Sun, because that's the one that's fookin' classy.

See how she loved! See how Guccifer ghosted her ass! See how she loves him (them) still! See how she was all up in Seth Rich and shit! (We think Young's judgment might not be awesome.) Also she wrote this "erotic poem," and we're going to need you to read it.

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And now it is time for your weekly reminder that in the Trump era, FUCKING APESHIT OUTRAGE WORKS.

On Monday, Donald Trump, the transactional president who for some godforsaken reason sees Vladimir Putin has his one true father, discussed making an Art Of The Deal with Russia that involved letting Robert Mueller interrogate the Russian spies who hacked America in 2016 (with Russian supervision, of course, in Russia) in exchange for sending Putin whichever American citizens hurt Putin's poor fragile butthurt pansy-ass feelings the past several years. One of Putin's targets is Michael McFaul, the former ambassador to Russia, whom Putin just hates. Hillary Clinton isn't on the official list yet, but give it a few weeks.

On Wednesday, Sarah Huckabee Sanders looked at reporters and told them Trump's people were considering the idea, but hadn't decided yet, because it's so hard for the Trump administration to decide how many treasons to do per week.

But hooray! The White House has decided that, after literally every American with a patriotic bone in his or her body said, "THE FUCK YOU SAY," they will not send Americans to Putin's gulag after all. The Washington Post reports:

The White House announced Trump's opposition Thursday as the Senate prepared to vote on a resolution telling the president not to honor Putin's request, which would have exposed former U.S. ambassador Michael McFaul, among others, to Russian questioning.

"It is a proposal that was made in sincerity by President Putin, but President Trump disagrees with it," White House press secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders said in a statement.

Oh my fucking Lord, Shuckabee, did you really type that Putin's offer was "sincere," or did Donald grab the statement after you finished with it and add those words in illiterate Sharpie in the margins, along with "DOES NOT MEAN PUTIN IS NOT MY BEST FRIEND" and "NO COLLUSION"?

By the way, that resolution passed the Senate with flying colors:

WOMP WOMP, Trump! Sorry American freedom and democracy stepped all over your dick again! Guarantee it's gonna happen again! Go fuck yourself! Enjoy the 48 Big Macs you have for dinner tonight! Don't talk directly into the soccer ball Putin gave you, 'less you want it to talk back to you in Russian!

OK post over.

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[Washington Post]

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