In 20 days, millions of people in America and around the world will take to the streets with joy and relief in their hearts, COVID-19 be damned. (Wear masks, please!)
In 20 days, millions of people in America and around the world will spontaneously burst into tears, and many of them will not be expecting that, because they don't usually spontaneously burst into tears. But they will anyway.
In 20 days, millions of people in America and around the world will feel the oddest feeling, and it will be the lifting of the weight that's been on them ever since November 8, 2016, and January 20, 2017. The existential dread will start to be eased. Of course, because Donald Trump has been such a malevolent, selfish failure, it won't just go away. For many of us, Trump's presidency, especially since the start of the pandemic he worked so hard to spread, has been full of tragedy that will stay with us forever. Even those of us who have fared generally pretty well will have to heal, will have to bear scars.
We write this to you tonight on New Year's Eve, as the clock is becoming 2021 across the globe, to say that yes, for real, the worst part of this, the part where Donald Trump is the president of the United States, is really going to be over soon. It's fewer than three weeks away. And we are certain that he, festering disease that he is, will find a way to make these 20 days feel like even greater hell.
But we really did do that thing in November, and by "that thing" we mean we turned out by the tens of millions and we voted that motherfucker's worthless ass OUT. Joe Biden won in a landslide, and we're not just saying that because Trump told us so many times that a vote of 306 to 232 in the Electoral College is a landslide, since that was the number Russia helped him eke out, while losing the popular vote by almost three million. Joe Biden beat Trump by seven million votes, and almost five percentage points, which is just about exactly where a lot of the polls said it might shake out.
Joe Biden took back all the Rust Belt states Trump just so happened to win after Paul Manafort gave Rust Belt polling data to a literal actual Russian spy. Joe Biden also took Arizona and Georgia and made them blue.
He did that. Kamala Harris did that. We did that. You did that. I, personally, did that, THANK ME LATER.
And yes, it's always darkest before the dawn, and if you are like us, you still have a fearful voice in the back of your head that's telling you that maybe somehow Trump will succeed in stealing the election at the last minute, which would officially end the American democratic experiment. He won't. But if you're like us, you won't believe it until you see it, at least not all the way.
On January 5, five days from now, Georgia will go to the polls, and if voting numbers so far are any indication, Jon Ossoff and Raphael Warnock might (MIGHT!) even gain on Joe Biden's Georgia victory. But it only happens if we all work to make it happen, so your first job as an American citizen in the new year is to find out whatever you need to do to help in Georgia. Make phone calls, donate, if you're in Georgia, see what you can do to help directly on the ground. Joe Biden deserves to have a Senate that isn't a total piece of shit as he becomes president on January 20, which again, is happening, for real, on January 20.
We did this. 2020, on top of everything terrible about it, was the year we took our country the fuck back.
Now let's act like it.
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2020: The Year We Motherf*ckin WON.
I think Holly's cooking with onions again.
Peace HP. He was fucking magnificent.
Elegant, refined happy doggos are still elegant refined happy doggos even after they have sniffed someone else's butt.